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Chortle Chook

I HATE my chickens

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I HATE my chickens today. :evil: They've been and dug up then shredded, but not eaten, every single one of my irises :cry::cry:

Last year they left them all alone and I had such a pretty display that I'd bought a whole lot more (irises, but ok more chickens too :doh: ).

 

I asked OH if he could strangle the wicked chickens, and he said, with a big grin, 'Now that I can do, cheerfully'. However, realising they are not even any good for the pot I've commuted their sentence to 'No meal worms all day'. I also took out a shortbread biccy which I normally share with them at elevenses and ate every single bit right in front of them without dropping so much as a crumb. I then went back in and cooked up all the eggs they have given me this week (all 4 from 8 hens :roll: ) and gave them to the dogs.

 

Now I've calmed down a bit I'm racking my brains about how to cheer up my poor little garden. Perhaps some large pots (my chickens don't fly) in the middle of the now bare patches, with some irises and tulips in those. :think:

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:lol::lol: :lol: No a step too far, not the eggs :shock:

 

Sorry I'm still chuckling. I'll send you some iris and fencing just for giving me such a good laugh.

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Uh oh. Bad chickens! I read the blog of someone who says she buries tomato cages sideways to keep her chickens from scratching in beds that she doesn't want them in. Sounds like a lot of effort, but if you are serious about your flowers, it might be worth it!

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I know how you feel ..I have given up . Hanging baskets and climbing roses for me .The pics below was once my herb garden ..The second pic is the girls onthe way to destruction...Every one said "They don't like herbs!"

 

chickens2003.jpg

girlsoutandabout001.jpg

 

 

This is my OH on the same bit last weekend. :roll:

digging009.jpg

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Thanks jackian :) I realise with chickens that they take the best bits first and because other bits are left first time round (read first year) does not mean they won't take them the second time round (read second year) :roll: My lavender has just been mollard too. :(

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Here is the ring leader in this sorry story

ChickenDill_Leaderofthepack_March2012.jpg

 

and first wife Daisy in the middle of the mess

ChickenDaisymakingamess.jpg

 

"Who me?" says Dolly, ever the innocent

Chickens-whome.jpg

 

Here is a chicken proof plant, but alas, rather boring :(

Chickenproofplants.jpg

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Not for long, mine have started eating leylandii. :?

 

That's the best ringleader I've seen 8)

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Hilarious - no shortbread for you my girls! :lol:

 

I've had them wrecking all my pots which thankfully still have last year's old stuff in - they've been well weeded but half the compost is now on the ground.

 

Sue

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Oh but you have the loveliest hens :D I know exactly what you mean. My once beautiful garden has been utterly destroyed, hence the reason I've made them their own garden. Got to be tough, Chubby. :D

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:shock: can chickens be that naughty. No mealworms! That's taking it a bit far.

 

Or should I start to worry. Our Ginger and Siouxsie seem as thick as thieves some times and despite being at the bottom of the hen hierarchy are often leading the others astray as this photo clearly shows...

naughty_duo.jpg

 

Caught the pair of them in the fenced of veg patch this morning - they had made a dust bath where I was going to plant carrots

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The Awfuls aided by Miss Dixie striped my new red and black currant plants that were shooting so strongly in the greenhouse. Can't believe it, it took 5 seconds (I know I was stood topping up feeders before I realised what they'd done). My mum very smuggly pointed out hers were really coming on. Grrrrr. No currants later in the year for some girls.

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My chooks have lots of space & fields to roam where they like, but they still get into the garden! Marlene even walks into the flippin' kitchen! :shameonu: This is the reason that I have my veggies growing in the field furthest from the house. I'm not concerned about watering, as the stream runs through or round all our fields - so can either do it by hand or set up a system or some kind.

I do have lots of daffodils in the garden, which they haven't touched at all. They tend not to touch bulbs. They left the Hydrangea alone too last year. :D However, any bedding plants will be in raised pots or hanging baskets in the garden. The rest will be spread round the fields, where they don't go - away from pigs & sheep - which will be coming soon.

I will never forget coming home once at my old house. I found my mini poly tunnel / cloche shaking vigourously. On closer inspection I found Bounty, Rolo & Smartie having a feast on beetroot, leeks, sweetcorn & radish!!!

Rolo still lives to tell the tale - she is our oldest chicken! :lol:

Emma.x

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Poor you I do sympathise. Equally impressed with your willpower. We have to use the low plastic fencing to keep them out of the beds. But boy the garden looks a mess these days, good for wildlife we suppose. Your naughty lot look mighty find though!

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I planted winter garlic in a pot and came back to find they had got in the pot and dug it all up and scoffed it. They also helped themselves to sage and spring onions, although oddly left the cabbage alone considering hens are supposed to love 'greens'.

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I, too, have pretty much given up on conventional planting. All summer we have lots of hanging baskets which are out of chooks' reach. The borders are all planted with evergreen shrubs which aren't touched by the 'girls' so the garden, actually, looks good! It's taken a while, though!! :D:clap:

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Thanks for your posts everyone. You quite cheered me up :D

 

I love the picture of your bold chooks, cloud :D

 

janeears any chance of a picture of your garden?

 

Plum, if your chooks are eating Leylandii you surely owe it to the nation to hire them out :wink:

 

My update on this is that this weekend was given up to outwitting my chickens. Either I'm a bird brain or they are chicken geniuses, but they almost had me stumped. Every time I tried to put the poor irises and tulips back in the earth, even behind a low fence, then under some chicken wire, the dastardly chickens went and hoiked them out. Then I had the idea that I could plant up some reclaimed chimney pots I've seen around to get my bulbs out of chicken reach. Alas, these prooved a tad expensive but I did find 4 tall pots in a sale at a farm shop and have up-ended two and put the other two on top of these so making a couple of little towers in which I can plant some dwarf bearded irises and tulips. I so hope this works :pray:

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It's agony reading this, just go and buy some netting and keep them out. Your bearded irises derserve it :D

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I'm seriously worried now having prepared all my beds :wink: - the stuff I've sown has plastic mesh lying over it as it won't be just the chickens digging in it, with four cats and a dog, fox too. Touch wood they are keeping off that. The beds will soon all be netted in an attempt to foil the chickens. I really would like some veg this year! The fruit is in a cage so that's OK.

 

The rest of the garden is fair game I suppose but there is plenty of space. I rely on them weeding around the plants but then again I didn't have chickens last spring so I suspect decimation will be what they get up to.

 

Sie

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So lovely to hear a story close to my own heart! I spent a fortune last year buying different types of ferms for a woodland patch in the garden. My doodles have completely anaihalated them. I've not got the area fenced off with temporary chicken fencing until they get the chance to revover but every now and again I will find one of the little blighter has managed to squeeze into the area and have anothyer go at the shoots.

 

Their current favourate is the sprouting buds on my very expensive bonsai acer tree. Almost like catnip for doodles as they cant get enough of it :x

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