Snowy Posted September 14, 2008 Share Posted September 14, 2008 My friends must be on a roll this weekend, here's another one - had me in stitches anyway! After every flight, pilots fill out a form called a gripe sheet, which conveys to the mechanics problems encountered with the aircraft during the flight that need repair or correction. The mechanics read and correct the problem, and then respond in writing on the lower half of the form what remedial action was taken so that the pilot can review the sheet before the next flight. Never let it be said that the grounds crews and engineers lack a sense of humour. Here are some actual logged maintenance complaints and problems as submitted by Qantas pilots and the solution recorded by maintenance engineers. (P = The problem logged by the pilot) (S = The solution and action taken by the engineers) P: Left inside main tyre almost needs replacing. S: Almost replaced left inside main tyre. ----- P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough. S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft. ----- P: Something loose in cockpit. S: Something tightened in cockpit. ----- P: Dead bugs on windshield. S: Live bugs on back-order. ----- P: Auto-pilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent. S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground. ----- P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear. S: Evidence removed. ----- P: DME volume unbelievably loud. S: DME volume set to more believable level. ----- P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick. S: That’s what they are there for. ----- P: IFF inoperative. S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode. ----- P: Suspected crack in windshield. S: Suspect you’re right. ----- P: Number 3 engine missing. S: Engine found on right wing after brief search. ----- P: Aircraft handles funny. S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right and be serious. ----- P: Target radar hums. S: Target radar reprogrammed with lyrics. ----- P: Mouse in cockpit. S: Cat installed. __________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chickvic Posted September 14, 2008 Share Posted September 14, 2008 very funny Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egluntyne Posted September 14, 2008 Share Posted September 14, 2008 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Couperwife Posted September 14, 2008 Share Posted September 14, 2008 Ive heard this before, but it shill makes me laugh cathy x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ain't Nobody Here Posted September 14, 2008 Share Posted September 14, 2008 I've not seen that one - very funny . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
..lay a little egg for me Posted September 14, 2008 Share Posted September 14, 2008 loved it... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jules. Posted September 14, 2008 Share Posted September 14, 2008 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deejmum Posted September 14, 2008 Share Posted September 14, 2008 Made me chuckle Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rusky123 Posted September 14, 2008 Share Posted September 14, 2008 LOl, made me laugh Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
