clootie Posted January 16, 2009 Share Posted January 16, 2009 A mature (over 40) lady gets pulled over for speeding... Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer? Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding. Older Woman: Oh, I see. Officer: Can I see your license please? Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one. Officer: Don't have one? Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving. Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please. Older Woman: I can't do that. Officer: Why not? Older Woman: I stole this car. Officer: Stole it? Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner. Officer: You what? Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun. Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please! The woman steps out of her vehicle.. Older woman: Is there a problem sir? Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner. Older Woman: Murdered the owner? Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please. The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk. Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am? Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers. The officer is quite stunned. Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license. The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer. The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled. Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner. Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too. You all thought it was me, didn't you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phonix Posted January 16, 2009 Share Posted January 16, 2009 Thats really funny and when I saw the title I did think that whoever posted it had been caught speeding for just a second and then my next thought was that it would be some strange newspaper article! lol xXx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cooks Posted January 16, 2009 Share Posted January 16, 2009 good one to start the day Clootie! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jillus Posted January 16, 2009 Share Posted January 16, 2009 I had a friend who got stopped for speeding. She told the officers she could not possibly be speeding as she had a large flower arrangement in the car. She got off with a warning! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goosey Lucy Posted January 16, 2009 Share Posted January 16, 2009 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fowlbird Posted January 16, 2009 Share Posted January 16, 2009 I've seen that one before funny... we used to have a Lada... I regularly broke the speed limit in it (90 down Marlow Hill ), if I'd ever been caught my excuse was going to be that I couldn't possibly have been speeding - it's a LADA! then one day some bloke got stopped for speeding and used that exact same excuse*... couldn't use it after that could I? Fortunately I've been driving VWs for years * it was in the Daily Mirror so must have been true Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mutrix Farmers Posted January 16, 2009 Share Posted January 16, 2009 thanks clootie, I needed a chuckle. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chickvic Posted January 16, 2009 Share Posted January 16, 2009 Very funny! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paola Posted January 16, 2009 Share Posted January 16, 2009 Love it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seagazer Posted January 16, 2009 Share Posted January 16, 2009 Very funny and yes I did think it was you Clootie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
