Mel (& Paul) Posted November 29, 2005 Share Posted November 29, 2005 I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes. Gardening Rule: When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant. The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement. Never take life seriously. "Ooops, word censored!"ody gets out alive anyway. There are two kinds of pedestrians: the quick and the dead. Life is sexually transmitted. Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth. Some people are like Slinkies. Not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs. Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing. Have you noticed since everyone has a camcorder these days no one talks about seeing UFOs like they used to? Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again. All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism. In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal. Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first. How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire? Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs! If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Frugal Posted November 29, 2005 Share Posted November 29, 2005 Very good Mel! Love the Slinky one!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mel (& Paul) Posted November 29, 2005 Author Share Posted November 29, 2005 I know, cant you just imagine it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Frugal Posted November 29, 2005 Share Posted November 29, 2005 It's the same watching anyone trip up as they walk along the street and look back to see what they tripped on !! Only funny when it's not me though ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mel (& Paul) Posted November 29, 2005 Author Share Posted November 29, 2005 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lesley Posted November 29, 2005 Share Posted November 29, 2005 Hi Mel! I liked the Slinky one best as well - wonder what that says about us? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mel (& Paul) Posted November 29, 2005 Author Share Posted November 29, 2005 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nicola H Posted November 29, 2005 Share Posted November 29, 2005 I liked the one about UFOs that is so true............. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted November 29, 2005 Share Posted November 29, 2005 Brilliant! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sheilaz Posted November 29, 2005 Share Posted November 29, 2005 ...and I laughed out loud at the last one! Brilliant topic there, Mel, I even like the title. Some to laugh at and some to er, well, ponder over.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mel (& Paul) Posted November 29, 2005 Author Share Posted November 29, 2005 I have to confess that my good friend Helen (helloooo Helen are you there?!) sent me the ponderisms and I thought they would go down well on the forum By the way, I'm not mad asking if Helen is there - she bought an eglu (pink the big girl!) recently and has become addicted to the chooks. I would say she is as mad as me, but she may be offended.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
