The Dogmother Posted August 22, 2008 Share Posted August 22, 2008 Sorry not to have been around recently - things have been a tad hectic (I honestly think that i get more of a rest at work than being laid off sick at home!) This one was sent by a good friend and it made me chuckle: For your next tough day (though doesn't mention, cats, chicks or jobs) To the ladies that will appreciate this one........it's funny...... THE NEXT SURVIVOR SERIES Six married men will be dropped on an island with one car and 3 kids each for six weeks. Each kid will play two sports and either take music or dance classes. There is no fast food. Each man must take care of his 3 kids; keep his assigned house clean, correct all homework, and complete science projects, cook, do laundry, and pay a list of 'pretend' bills with not enough money. In addition, each man will have to budget in money for groceries each week. Each man must remember the birthdays of all their friends and relatives, and send cards out on time--no emailing. Each man must also take each child to a doctor's appointment, a dentist appointment and a haircut appointment. He must make one unscheduled and inconvenient visit per child to the A & E. He must also make biscuits or cakes for a social function. Each man will be responsible for decorating his own assigned house, planting flowers outside and keeping it presentable at all times. The men will only have access to television when the kids are asleep and all chores are done. The men must shave their legs, wear makeup daily, adorn himself with jewellery, wear uncomfortable yet stylish shoes, keep fingernails polished and eyebrows groomed. During one of the six weeks, the men will have to endure severe abdominal cramps, back aches, and have extreme, unexplained mood swings but never once complain or slow down from other duties. They must attend weekly school meetings, church, and find time at least once to spend the afternoon at the park or a similar setting. They will need to read a book to the kids each night and in the morning, feed them, dress them, brush their teeth and comb their hair by 8:00 am. A test will be given at the end of the six weeks, and each father will berequired to know all of the following information: each child's birthday, height, weight, shoe size, clothes size and doctor's name. Also the child's weight at birth, length, time of birth, and length of labour, each child's favourite colour, middle name, favourite snack, favourite song, favourite drink, favourite toy, biggest fear and what they want to be when they grow up. The kids vote them off the island based on performance. The last man wins only if... he still has enough energy to be intimate with his spouse at a moment's notice. If the last man does win, he can play the game over and over and over again for the next 18-25 years eventually earning the right to be called Mum! I've never been a Stepford Wife myself, but lots of that rang true.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tina C Posted August 22, 2008 Share Posted August 22, 2008 *Waves* Hi Clare I have not been around much either - its the school holiday and work juggling that does it for me. And that is a very timely reminder of why I don't have time to mooch around on here much! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egluntyne Posted August 22, 2008 Share Posted August 22, 2008 I've never done the make up or nails thing but much of it rang true for me too. Oh...and I know what you mean about going to work for a rest. At least you don't heat "Muuuuum...where's my......" every 10 mins there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted August 22, 2008 Author Share Posted August 22, 2008 Oh...and I know what you mean about going to work for a rest. At least you don't heat "Muuuuum...where's my......" every 10 mins there. It's not dissimilar though... bringing up children is good training for working with all men Although I don't have to take them to the toilet.. very much like toddler taming in all other aspects though Rosie was being very 'helpful' today.. that sort of helpful that entailed asking me every 5 minutes how to do something rather than thinking about it, so I had to stop what I was doing to show her... got it done eventually though Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 22, 2008 Share Posted August 22, 2008 Hiya - was wondering where you'd been lately! The holidays are double hectic arent they? Cant' wait to get back to work for a rest myself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cate in NZ Posted August 23, 2008 Share Posted August 23, 2008 Hee hee, lots of that rang true for me as well Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chickvic Posted August 24, 2008 Share Posted August 24, 2008 very funny - I like it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jules. Posted August 24, 2008 Share Posted August 24, 2008 I like that very much Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
