Ain't Nobody Here Posted December 6, 2007 Share Posted December 6, 2007 My mother has never shown the slightest interest in my girls so I don't really talk about them to her. Today, however, to make conversation (not easy with someone who constantly moans about how awful being old is and how everything is terrible and what's the point of anything ... you get the picture) I told her they'd started laying again. She seemed pleased to hear the news then went on about how the she loves to see chickens roaming around totally free, scratching and pecking and eating worms. The implication was that mine don't have that kind of life, although she never actually said as much. I know what you are all going to say, but she's got me feeling guilty that my girls are in their run all day (especially at this time of year) and don't freerange very much. It's not as though my girls are ex-battery - perhaps they would have had a better life staying with the farmer where they were totally freerange. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Martin B Posted December 6, 2007 Share Posted December 6, 2007 Your girls are fine. I'm sure your mother didn't mean to make you feel guilty! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chickenlover Posted December 6, 2007 Share Posted December 6, 2007 for a moment i thought you meant your girls as in your daughters My chicken freerange in the garden in the summer but it isnt practical for me to do it in this weather as i cant keep going in and out checking for cats ect like in the summer and keeping the back door open at this time of year is a big no no, exspecially with 2 girls with asthma. But im sure your girls do enough scratching ect in their run, infact your mother probally didnt mean to offend you in any way, just commenting on how she likes to see chickens behaving in the way they do....Maybe you are just subconciously feeling guilty about not having the girls out and have only just realized it when your mother made her comments. Please dont feel bad or think she was having a 'dig' im sure loads of us dont freerange as much in the winter as we do in the summer, and surly if your girls are laying again that means they are happy and in good health Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Martin B Posted December 6, 2007 Share Posted December 6, 2007 for a moment i thought you meant your girls as in your daughters I have to admit I did at first too! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 6, 2007 Share Posted December 6, 2007 I did too Don't feel guilty about having them in the run, they have a lot more space than battery chooks Better in there than the fox getting them Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xScrunchee Posted December 6, 2007 Share Posted December 6, 2007 You know your Mum better than us and you no doubt know what she meant by her comment but what you need to remember is that if your Mum feels the need to have little digs at you-it is her who feels unhappy with herself and is just projecting onto you. People who are unhappy quite often try to drag other people down-sometimes they don't even realise that they are doing it. Try not to let yourself get too affected by it. You know that your girls are fine. I feel a bit bad sometimes if I haven't let them out but such is life and we are all doing our best. Chin up and smile Life's too short Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rona Posted December 6, 2007 Share Posted December 6, 2007 I sometimes feel bad too that I can't let mine free range and I haven't finished their bigger run yet but they don't seem to mind and are happy pottering about in the eglu run. They are laying well, eating well - and pooing well so I guess they are OK. Don't worry, so long as your mother doesn't go out and tell them they are hard done by they will never know and will live in blissful ignorance. Most important: Just because she is your mother doesn't mean she is right! Mothers know best and you are your chicken's mother, therefore you know what is best for them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lovemychooks Posted December 6, 2007 Share Posted December 6, 2007 I can't let my girls out to free range much now because i'm at work all day and when I get home they are all tucked up. Even though i've got a walk in run I still feel guilty sometimes but make up for it with treats for them !! Tomorrow is sweetcorn, spinach and greens hung up in the run !! Don't feel bad Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ain't Nobody Here Posted December 6, 2007 Author Share Posted December 6, 2007 You know your Mum better than us and you no doubt know what she meant by her comment but what you need to remember is that if your Mum feels the need to have little digs at you-it is her who feels unhappy with herself and is just projecting onto you. People who are unhappy quite often try to drag other people down-sometimes they don't even realise that they are doing it. Try not to let yourself get too affected by it. Have you met my mum? You've got her sussed if you haven't. That's exactly what she does - it's not the first time (by a long chalk) and I'm sure won't be the last. Oh, well, it won't be for long : "I can't live through another winter", "this'll be my last Christmas", "no point buying new clothes, I won't get much use out of them", "6 months road tax will do, I'll not be around for 12". Funny that, she's been saying things like that for years . Thank you, everyone, for your reassurance. I just needed to hear it - and I knew you'd all be there for me . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
craftyhunnypie Posted December 6, 2007 Share Posted December 6, 2007 take no notice love! Mine don't often free range due to the newbies been flighty & taking off & the old Omlet chooks come out for a fuss & a treat, then run back to safety of the run. We don't let them free range much as our garden joins up with nearly 12 others - so if they escaped - it would be a nightmare! We have some plastic wire fencing, that we fence of parts of the garden with, but the new ones can fly over it, even with clipped wings! Mine are very happy in their runs & produce well too. 4 out of 6 laying at the moment - in winter, so I think they are happy don't you? People are quick to say things, but I bet deep down they are jealous that you have chooks & they don't!!!! Emma.x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 6, 2007 Share Posted December 6, 2007 I felt horrible today as I didn't see my girls except for 5 seconds before we left to go shopping today. By the time we got home, it was dark and they were all in bed. They hadn't been out of their run or had any treats. I felt so awful, like a bad mother or something. We can only let them out when the weather is good anyway and that's not often. You're feeling like this because you love your chickens so, ergo, how can you be wicked or cruel? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Couperwife Posted December 6, 2007 Share Posted December 6, 2007 hmmmm are you mean and cruel ? - NOOOOOOOOOOOO you are not!!!! you are a fab chicken mummy and your girls dont want to go out free ranging all day as its too cold and windy I know this cos they were on the forum earlier talking to my girls (who also dont want to go out as its too cold and windy) Ignore your mum, she doesnt know anything about being a good chicken mummy cathy x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xScrunchee Posted December 6, 2007 Share Posted December 6, 2007 Have you met my mum? You've got her sussed if you haven't. That's exactly what she does - it's not the first time (by a long chalk) and I'm sure won't be the last. Oh, well, it won't be for long : "I can't live through another winter", "this'll be my last Christmas", "no point buying new clothes, I won't get much use out of them", "6 months road tax will do, I'll not be around for 12". Funny that, she's been saying things like that for years . Thank you, everyone, for your reassurance. I just needed to hear it - and I knew you'd all be there for me . Met sooo many people like that. Shame that they would rather wallow in self pity than see their own behaviour and try to improve. Never mind, can only help those who want to be helped. All you have to do is make sure that one day you don't turn into your Mum and inflict all that guilt and suffering on some poor soul!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Olly Posted December 6, 2007 Share Posted December 6, 2007 your girls dont want to go out free ranging all day as its too cold and windy I know this cos they were on the forum earlier talking to my girls (who also dont want to go out as its too cold and windy) Gosh were they talking to mine as well? Mine have not been out of the run for nearly two weeks, because I was away last weekend and the friend who came to check on them came after dark. There isn't time to let them out in the morning before work, and I am away this weekend too. I wish they could have a run around, but they are fine I know. Better safe in the run, fed and sheltered with a nice cosy Eglu to sleep in, than free-range, at risk, and living in a huge flock on a farm. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ain't Nobody Here Posted December 6, 2007 Author Share Posted December 6, 2007 Yeah, you're all so right, I'm a fantastic chicken mummy and my mother knows nowt. So yah boo sucks to her . All you have to do is make sure that one day you don't turn into your Mum and inflict all that guilt and suffering on some poor soul!! As luck would have it, I'm adopted so I have every confidence that I will enjoy life to the full till the day I fall off my perch . My OH has always said that if I wasn't adopted he wouldn't have married me, because he couldn't have faced me turning into my mum . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Couperwife Posted December 6, 2007 Share Posted December 6, 2007 not that I want to defend Mother, but she cant be that bad as: 1. she adopted you 2. you seem to be kind of ok really 3. you are a fab chicken mummy cathy x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egluntyne Posted December 6, 2007 Share Posted December 6, 2007 Don't let her guilt trip you into doing something that you know wont be in the hens best interests. You are not cruel and heartless. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
xScrunchee Posted December 6, 2007 Share Posted December 6, 2007 Think you would feel a little worse if you gave them so much freedom to peck about that a fox came along and killed them all. You carry on how you are Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ain't Nobody Here Posted December 6, 2007 Author Share Posted December 6, 2007 2. you seem to be kind of ok really Aww, shucks Actually, my mum is OK most of the time, she just blows up occasionally and as I'm the only person she usually sees (apart from my dad) I get the full blast. She's taking tablets now and is being quite nice to me . I have taken all your kind comments on board . This forum doesn't half do your self-esteem good . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 6, 2007 Share Posted December 6, 2007 go and give the other half a cuddle and forget about what your mum said Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ain't Nobody Here Posted December 6, 2007 Author Share Posted December 6, 2007 go and give the other half a cuddle It'll have to be the dog - OH is out at a gig . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snowy Posted December 6, 2007 Share Posted December 6, 2007 go and give the other half a cuddle It'll have to be the dog - OH is out at a gig . Even better! Dogs are much more understanding! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
little chickadee Posted December 7, 2007 Share Posted December 7, 2007 Hope you're feeling a bit better now after hugging the dog! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WitchHazel Posted December 7, 2007 Share Posted December 7, 2007 I told her they'd started laying again. She seemed pleased to hear the news then went on about how the she loves to see chickens roaming around totally free, scratching and pecking and eating worms. The implication was that mine don't have that kind of life, although she never actually said as much. Maybe, just maybe of course, your mum was trying to be supportive and enthusiastic (for once)? You mention that you don't normally talk to your mum about the girls, so the chances are she doesn't really understand the difference between them having 'freedom within your run' and 'freedom to free range'. I would guess that (like most non chicken owners) thinks that chickens are either kept in battery cages or else run free, and she equates your set up with them running free. Obviously I don't have the baggage of the history between you and your mum (although of course I have my own with mine ), so when I read the words you'd written, I didn't take them as a dig. Not sure if that helps, but thought I'd put my oar in anyway. xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
