fourfinches Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Just received an e-mail form a friend, thought you might enjoy it.... Summer Classes for Men at THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED By Friday, August 17th 2008 NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM Class 1 How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays--Step by Step, with Slide Presentation. Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM. Class 2 The Toilet Paper Roll--Does It Change Itself? Round Table Discussion. Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours. Class 3 Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?--Group Practice. Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours. Class 4 Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor--Pictures and Explanatory Graphics. Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks. Class 5 Dinner Dishes--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink? Examples on Video. Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM Class 6 Loss Of Identity--Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other. Help Line Support and Support Groups. Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM Class 7 Learning How To Find Things--Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming. Open Forum Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours. Class 8 Health Watch--Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health Graphics and Audio Tapes. Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours. Class 9 Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost-- Real Life Testimonials. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined Class 10 Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks? Driving Simulations. 4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours. Class 11 Learning to Live--Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife. Online Classes and role-playing Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined Class 12 How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques. Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM. Class 13 How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy--Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late. Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered. Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours. Class 14 The Stove/Oven--What It Is and How It Is Used. Live Demonstration. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined. Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors. Send this to all the guys that you think can stand the heat, and to all the ladies for the best chuckle of their day! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tiggy Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 very good Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egluntyne Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Hysterical. Can I book three places please. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gooner.girl Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Can i send DH to classes 2,4, 5 and 7 please?! He's actually pretty good at most of the others. Especially 8 - bless him! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joojoo Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 What a shame if I had known about those classes it may have saved me the cost of a divorce Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Richard T Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 And courses are also available for women in the following subjects: 1. Silence, the Final Frontier: Where No Woman Has Gone Before. 2. The Undiscovered Side of Banking: Making Deposits. 3. Parties: Going Without New Outfits 4. Man Management: Minor household chores can wait till after the match. 5. Bathroom Etiquette I: Men Need Space in the Bathroom Cabinet Too. 6. Bathroom Etiquette II: His Razor is his. 7. Bathroom Etiquette III: The Toilet Seat Goes Up as well as Down 8. Communication Skills I: Tears - The Last Resort, not the First. 9. Communication Skills II: Thinking Before Speaking. 10. Communication Skills III: Getting What you Want Without Nagging. 11. Driving a Car Safely: A Skill You CAN Acquire. 12. Telephone Skills: How to Hang Up. 13. Introduction to Parking. 14. Advanced Parking: Backing Into a Space. 15. Water Retention: Fact or Fat. 16. Cooking I: Bringing Back Bacon, Eggs and Butter. 17. Cooking II: Bran and Tofu are Not for Human Consumption. 18. Cooking III: How not to Inflict Your Diets on Other People. 19. Compliments: Accepting Them Gracefully. 20. Dancing: Why Men Don't Like To. 21. Classic Clothing: Wearing Outfits You Already Have. 22. Household Dust: A Harmless Natural Occurrence Only Women Notice. 23. Integrating Your Laundry: Washing It All Together. 24. Oil and Petrol: Your Car Needs Both. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egluntyne Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Another cup of tea comes down my nose. It never used to happen before I joined this forum Very funny Richard. I'd start running now if I were you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Richard T Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 I'd start running now if I were you. I'm putting me trainers on now. This forum does keep me fit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Looney Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joojoo Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snowy Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Both hilarious! Bet it causes a few more nasal washouts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevie Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 PMSL! I shouldnt laugh due to being a bloke,but they'e fantastic! and true... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chickvic Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Very funny, both of them! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jess Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Just received an e-mail form a friend, thought you might enjoy it.... Summer Classes for Men at THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED By Friday, August 17th 2008 NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM Class 1 How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays--Step by Step, with Slide Presentation. Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM. Class 2 The Toilet Paper Roll--Does It Change Itself? Round Table Discussion. Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours. Class 3 Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?--Group Practice. Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours. Class 4 Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor--Pictures and Explanatory Graphics. Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks. Class 5 Dinner Dishes--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink? Examples on Video. Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM Class 6 Loss Of Identity--Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other. Help Line Support and Support Groups. Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM Class 7 Learning How To Find Things--Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming. Open Forum Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours. Class 8 Health Watch--Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health Graphics and Audio Tapes. Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours. Class 9 Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost-- Real Life Testimonials. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined Class 10 Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks? Driving Simulations. 4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours. Class 11 Learning to Live--Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife. Online Classes and role-playing Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined Class 12 How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques. Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM. Class 13 How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy--Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late. Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered. Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours. Class 14 The Stove/Oven--What It Is and How It Is Used. Live Demonstration. Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined. Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors. Send this to all the guys that you think can stand the heat, and to all the ladies for the best chuckle of their day! LOOOOL this is all perfect i love it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gamebird Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Very funny, although a little bit worrying because I could probably do with signing up for Classes 1, 2, 4 and 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jess Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 I am seriously still laughing at this omg i need help Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms Marple Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 My sides are sore from chuckling - at both very well observed! I need to give up work as this forum is far too entertaining! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lesley Posted August 5, 2008 Share Posted August 5, 2008 Both are brilliant! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
