Patridge bantam chicken poorly foot?

[rusky123]

OK, I was on the way home from pub a good few months ago and a man ran out of a house a few doors down from us crying for help.His English was poor.I helped recussitate(sp) a little baby with a lot of help from the ambulance team on the phone. Baby was dead at one point.I know baby was in hospital for a few weeks after, DH used to go down and ask the father about his son but have seen no sign of baby being home since. A few months ago I had a letter from a solicitor addressed to the occupier,asking me to phone him, which I did about 6 times, he was always out of the office. I left my name and number.No reply. Just recieved another letter from him asking me how many bruises I saw on the baby, if I would be a character witness for the mum, and if she was being rough with the little mite when I stepped in to help. All I saw was a baby in need and a totally distraught Mum. Their older daughter was doing CPR, she is only about 8 years old, and the Mum was doing mouth to mouth. They were doing it all wrong, but it was the only way they knew.I had to pull Mum of her very ill baby,and keep her away from him, not nice.How can I be a character witness for someone I do not know. The Dads face lights up whenever he sees DH, dont know why, DH ran out of their house, could not cope with a baby being ill, and just held the Dad in his arms and cried with him. They had lost a little boy a year before. Mum totally ignores me, wont return a smile.I would like to help this family, but feel unable to help because I do not know them well enough. If a baby is in danger I would rather not respond and let social services do their job, on the otherhand I saw the total anguish on the parents faces and want to help, nearly lost our eldest when she was 3, the trauma stays with you. Sorry if I have rambled a bit. All I can do is say what I saw, and hope I never see that pain on a parents face again.

[Egluntyne]

I think I remember you posting about this.

 

I would just say that you are unable to be a character witness as you don't know them, and as for bruising etc.....everything happened so quickly that you didn't particularly notice. You were concentrating on the task in hand.

 

Perhaps the Citizens Advice Bureau would advise you as to whether you are obliged to respond, or give any evidence.

 

Tricky.

[Olly]

I shouldn't have thought you would have time to notice any bruising etc in a situation like that - surely the ambulance staff would be in a better position to comment on that. And how could you form a view on how either the mum or dad were behaving, they must have been totally distraught.

 

Unless you feel you have got some evidence to put forward, I'd just reply and say you didn't have time to form a view on any of these questions. Better to respond, rather than ignore it, but if you have nothing to say then it's most unlikely that you would be asked to attend court. (If the court asked you to attend, you'd have to go - but that's only if they think you have something they need to hear.)

 

What a sad end to your good deed, but at least the little baby survived.

[quickcluck]

I totally agree...... if you do not personally know the family how can you vouch for their character????

 

I'd reply in writing saying some thing similar....

 

Dont let this detract from the fact that you did a wonderful thing

[Guest]

It sounds as if they are being accused of negligence or something. I would not wish to be involved.

 

I agree with what others have said about character witnessing - you can't. But you can say that what you saw were two distraught parents desperate for their baby. Re the bruising, if the young daughter was doing CPR, there may well be significant bruising especially as she didn't know what she was doing.

 

I hate to think that these people are being investigated because they have suffered more than one tragedy. That is an awful situation. On the other hand, if they are maltreating in some way, then they and their children need help. Horrible situation!

[The Dogmother]

I agree with the others, it's a tricky situation. Stick to what you know and just tell them that, the social services may be trying to bring a case against the parents and it's hard not to get involved, but I am sure that between the paramedics and the doctors at the hospital, they have witnesses who saw far more than you did.

 

 

You did a sterling job. The British Red Cross offers a helpline service to people who have been involved in simsilar cases, and will talk through things with you if needs be.

[buffie]

I was once told it's better to not respond to this type of thing.

 

Buffie x

[Helly Welly]

You can only tell the solicitor what you know and from the sounds of it you don't have eough evidence for them to use. They'll just be contacting anyone who may have had contact with the family. I would reply to the letter but just tell them what happened and tat you had no time to form opinions on anything.

 

Never forget that you were amazing that day. My Mum had to recusitate an old man who collapsed in her shop, he died in hospital which makes her feel guilty, but she kept him alive until the paramedics got there, without her he would have had no chance at all. It takes a special person to step in like that, you are a special person.

[Willow]

I think you should stand up and say what you saw ie. distraught parents and what you can have no view on ie. you cannot say yes or no to bruising. The case will not be decided on your evidence alone. I have a friend who was involved in a case that I'll PM you about.

[chickenanne]

Firstly, well done for helping out and knowing what to do. And sympathies for what must now be a very stressful situation.

I imagine that the solicitor has contacted you as being first on the scene, and being involved in helping out.

Try calling the solicitor again, and if no reply then write to them, explaining what happened and that you don't know the family at all. State that all you could testify to is what you saw, and clarify that you cannot say anything more becuase you don't know.

It may be that they really jsut want you as a witness, and personally I do think you should respond to that, but only in sofar as explaining what you can recall of what happened and what you saw.

[rusky123]

I have phoned the solicitor in question a good few times this week,and like the last time no reply again from him. Really cheeses me off. I have got to the point where I think he is taking his legal aid payment and doing nothing one way or the other except send 2 letters. I might be wrong, hope so. On the brighter side did a first aid course on Monday , guess who had a massive allergic reaction to the dummy we were doing mouth to mouth on! . Mouth has only just started to get back to normal, I look like a little girl who has put her Mums lipstick on. . Scary, but glad I did the course, I think it should be taught in school, you never know when you need to step in and help. Thanks for your support, Moyna

[The Dogmother]

On the brighter side did a first aid course on Monday , guess who had a massive allergic reaction to the dummy we were doing mouth to mouth on! . Mouth has only just started to get back to normal, I look like a little girl who has put her Mums lipstick on. . Scary, but glad I did the course, I think it should be taught in school, you never know when you need to step in and help. Thanks for your support, Moyna

 

Good for you doing a course

 

I've held a first aid certificate of various kinds for the last 30 years and have used that knowledge on countless occasions - you won't regret it.

 

The disinfectant that they use on those dummies is vile and makes my lips sore too - trout pout has nothing on it! I take and use Milton wipes because I don't react to those. You can always ask them for a disposable mask to use. Some organisations provide those in the delegate packs. That way your lips don't come into contact with the dummy at all.

[Cooks]

I have to be first aid trained for my job, and have to agree the wipes they use taste horrible I just renewed my certificate and when we were using the dummies the wetness of the wipes took ages to dry so you were basically going to taste it whether you liked it or not... yeuch!

[Mrs Webmuppet]

I agree those disinfectant wipes are vile. I always make sure I have a thick layer of lip balm on for doing the CPR bit to protect my lips. On the last course I did we had to do the CPR bit first thing in the morning every morning........I caused some hilarity by leaving a lovely smear of pinky/ red lippy on the dummy. We did get to have a coffee afterwards to get rid of the taste!

[rusky123]

, Felt really embarassed cos my mouth was really trout like .Sure my staff felt I was being a drama queen!. Because I could not swallow just had to keep standing and walking about , sure the paramedic taking the course thought I was a nutter!.Once I had anti-histamine felt I could breath again, and the swelling started to go down.Took 2 days to get back to normal and the red blotches went.But really glad I did the course. Did it in college, cough, 40 + years ago, I am not that old, and again when I was a guider, only 25 years ago. So much has changed!. It does not matter how you put a bandage on, as long as it works. Amazing.

Back to my original topic, solicitor has not replied again!. Really angry now. Left detailed messages with his secretary, case number etc., if he is so desperate to get in touch with me, then for goodness sake reply. I can phone him tomorrow, he is a friend of my elder DD, but he does not know who I am, I am just a neighbour, occupier of no 77, a neighbour of this unfortunate family. A case number. If this Mother is mistreating her sons she deserves to be punished, no one should harm a child, but the minute I was dragged into that house all I saw was a grieving family. I will say what I saw, if solicitor ever replies. Perhaps I should go to his office in person. I have got so upset about this, I am willing to knock on his door!. You cannot claim to work for someone take the money and do nothing about it. Sorry gone on too long again, but this is really annoying me. I care about people and their families. That night really upset me. I was lucky and helped a little one. Was totally embarassed because I went into a Muslims home stinking of booze, and threw a fag into the gutter just before I recussitated baby. Just glad I know how to do it properly now!!!

[rusky123]

HellyWelly, just saw your post, tell your Mum she did all she could. I feel for her. No one could have done more. Been feeling more about myself lately, I have forgotern others have been through the same, give her my best wishes, XX Moyna