4m x 3m Omlet pen, cube, new auto door still boxed and coop light

[Snowy]

Lovely Omletteers please give me the benefit of your collective wisdom on this one!

 

My boys are 4 and 6. We live at the top end of a quiet cul de sac. There are other children on the street around the same age. We let them play out at the front of the house - the rules are that they stay on the pavement, do not go beyond our house - only down to the other children's houses, do not cross the road etc. If one comes in, they both come in, stick together, don't speak to strangers etc. They play really nicely and the other children are all well behaved and respect our rules

 

However - there are two older boys who do not live on the cul de sac, but a few roads away (I think! ). They ride their bikes into the road, dodging cars; encourage my boys to ride on their scooters so they can ride on our bikes; swear (I couldn't believe what my 4 year old said the other day ) etc. I have pleasantly told them that my boys are not the same age as them and are therefore not allowed to join in with their 'games'; told them not to swear; even told them that they really should go and find friends nearer their own age on their own road, but to no avail.

 

My boys are outside now, washing the cars, with their friends and one of these older boys is riding his bike up and down past them and hurling obscenities at them. As soon as I go to the door he tears away, then is back again a few minutes later.

 

All I can think off at the moment is to tell my boys they cannot play out, and maybe that is the solution until he gets fed up and goes away, but I am loathe to do that as they are having such a lovely time when he is not there.

 

How do I tackle this (short of laying a trip wire across the path )

 

Thanks for listening to the ramble!

[Ain't Nobody Here]

What a shame . Hopefully these yobs will get bored soon and find another cul-de-sac to terrorise but in the meantime can you ask around and see if anyone knows where they live? It may be that the parents are no better but it might be worth trying to find out and having a word.

[clootie]

Are you using a hose to rinse the car off? I know where I'd be accidentally aiming if you were

 

Can't you keep the kids in the back garden for a while - I'm sure those older boys will soon get bored and go off to annoy someone else if you do.

[The Dogmother]

Land mines?

 

Seriously, as the others have said, it's a shame that he's spoiling it for the others. I word with his parents (who probably aren't at home/don't care) and a soaking might just deter him!

[Snowy]

Love the way you are thinking! They haven't got the hose, just a bowl of water - but they've just told me they threw water at him the last time he rode past!

I've just been sat on the front step with my crochet to keep an eye on things (getting very odd looks from the neighbours! )

Not too sure I want to involve the parents as I actually feel sorry for these boys, hence trying to deal with them 'nicely'. From what I can gather father is in the pub all day and mother wants them out from under her feet I have let them come into the back garden before now to avoid the riding in the road thing, but they just wanted to chase the chickens if they were out, and let them out if they were in

Will go back to my crochet on the step - only another 10minutes then they will be coming in to get ready for youth club *phew* kids eh?

[jackiepoppies]

The hose idea occurred to me.... but I was thinking along the lines of power washer

 

Not an easy thing to know what to do for the best. Telling the parents will probably only result in getting them a 'clip round the ear' which will only encourage them to spend more time away from home.

Can you find out if there is some sort of fun type youth club/ activity for their age group they might be persuaded to go to

 

Another suggestion is that you could ask the local community police to patrol your area with a 'softly, softly' approach with more 'exciting' activities for them.

 

Sorry, not much help.

 

Jx

[Charlottechicken]

As Jackiepoppies suggests, I'd get in touch with the local Community Police Officer and let them know that these older lads are riding on roads and being a little reckless on their bikes, also that they are trying to involve younger children, and bullying. Now is a good time for the CPO to visit the schools and give children a little talk, before they break up for the summer.

 

Good luck

[WarrensWorld]

DINKY'S so no help at all really. I have to say the young people around here be they 5 or 15, are polite and well mannered. We know them all by name all eleven of them, the advantage of living in a very small village.

 

You could always go the Israeli/east German route and build a wall.........

 

Hands up who's thinking, kids will be kids.

[Snowy]

Well after writing all this, I went and sat outside and they came over and were chatting away to me! They aren't bad lads, just silly (one of them is a bit of a walter mitty character - keeps telling me all these tall tales ) so I am happy to keep them on side and try to reason with them, they are only 8 or 9 years old themselves. Some of the tales they tell do make me wonder about their home lives Ho hum. At least writing it all down here does help to put things into perspective! I'll just have to keep an eye on things and resign myself to crocheting on the front doorstep. Like the idea of involving community support and the school. I'm in the school on Friday - will have a quiet word with them then.

[clootie]

[Guest]

you're a good mum snowy!

 

and you're a bad girl clootie!

[Couperwife]

sounds to me like these boys just want a bit of attention, but dont know how to do it safely.

 

also sounds like you have def got them on side snowy , well done.

 

hope it settles down nicely soon.

 

cathy

x

[Guest]

you are probably the only adult that has taken an interest to talk to these boys but you are in a bit of a no winner ..damned if you do damned if you dont...

 

Your children are not these boys ages and I am sure they will soon get bored. Just make sure yours do not go to anyones house without telling you first(even if its with the friends they know..)Tell them they must run in to tell you which house they are at..otherwise ground them.

 

Just keep reminding yours to stay with friends of their own age but to keep it to themselves.

 

I would make a joke of it with your children but I wouldnt encourage the big boys in your house or garden as they will keep coming round if you make them too comfy. Make excuses ie you have just weedkillered the grass or you are going out soon they will soon get fed up etc(mind you perhaps the weedkiller is a good idea )

 

Agree sure they will get so bored..also can yours not go to any clubs ie beavers rainbow etc

 

Wouldnt bother with the parents you are just making a rod for your own back

 

good luck

indie

[Chucky Mama]

Boy like these are often very open to suggestion. They can be real diamonds deep down and I think that by getting them on side they could become with a few nudges in the right direction very good for your 2 little ones. For example you could say something along the lines of 'could you keep an eye out for kids swearing around them because they are very young to be hearing bad language' . They may then feel responsible for ensuring they curb their language and encouraging others to do so. Say that your boys are very little to be out and that you whilst they need not play with them, indeed you think that they are much too young to play with them but you would appreciate it if they could keep a bit of an eye out for them.

[chickencam]

Sounds like you are taking a very sensible approach to this, I like the ideas in Chucky Mama's post too.

 

I wouldn't let them into your house or back garden, children like this need some gently but firmly given boundaries, and your family need an escape route.

[Guest]

That's how I prefer to play things too Snowy. Chatting casually is usually helpful and deals with the problem nicely without them even noticing!

 

We have had a similar situation outside our house (also cul-de-sac but with grassy area to play on). We have had to involve the community police for the last few years and my children won't go out unless no-one else is there. Although we have had horrible things happen to our house and cars, I have to say that the Community Officer has been really supportive and helpful. So far this year we haven't had any problems.

 

I hope you keep things at a more pleasant level now!