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[Ziggy]

Hi all,

I haven't posted for ages, or been on the forum much, but I thought there would be people here who'd be able to give sensible advice. We are going to a wedding in a month's time, the groom is my hubby's friend, and hubby will be one of the ushers. I need to get outfits for myself and the girls (human girls that is - the chickens are not invited as far as I know). Now I'm not too concerned about the girls, I'm sure that whatever they wear will be fine and I'll take them shopping when they break of from school, but what on earth do I wear to a wedding?? The last wedding I went to was a traditional Indian wedding and I was wearing a sari, and apart from that I haven't been to a wedding since I was a teenager (except my own wedding). What does someone wear to a wedding? I'm a jeans and vest and boots kind of person, and spend my entire life dealing with young kids and pets, and while I can handle a cocktail outfit for a business dinner at xmas along hubby, when it comes to knowing what is appropriate for a wedding I'm totally lost.

Help, anyone, everyone, any suggestions welcome (a friend said I HAVE to wear a hat - apparently cause hats really suit me (!!??), and while I don't mind wearing a hat I don't want to have to take on another mortgage to cover the cost of the outfit, and mostly I don't want to end up looking like the queen's twin sister!!)...

Thanks in advance,

Ziggy

Edited January 19, 2009 by Guest

[Olly]

Do you know how smart it is - is it a church wedding, register office, one of those hotels that are licensed, do you know whether the groom etc are wearing top-hat and tails or is it more low-key? I don't think you can be too dressy for a wedding, though - it's a compliment to the bride and groom if you've taken the trouble to scrub up!

 

I do think hats always smarten up an outfit, and I love them, so if they suit you, you should definitely wear one! Apart from that - anything goes, personally I'd want something I could use again in another context. A smart suit might work, with a hat; or you could get black trousers and a top with a pashmina (I bought this sort of combination for my niece's wedding a couple of years ago), or a wrap dress, they're very flattering.

 

Bear in mind that if it's January it's going to be quite cold, if it's a church wedding with the reception somewhere else then your coat is going to be on show, whereas if it's an 'all-in-one' hotel type wedding, you probably won't be wearing a coat.

 

I'd look at somewhere like Coast, Principles, Monsoon etc for a smart dress or a top that you could team with plain trousers, and then focus on dressing it up with some bling, a hat or a fascinator, and smart shoes and bag.

 

Let us know what you get!

[BarbaraJ]

Depending on your budget next or m&s per una might be a cheaper option than those above.

[stoice]

This might help you Ziggy... http://www.debenhams.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/CategoryDisplay?storeId=10001&catalogId=10001&langId=-1&userType=A&categoryId=64883

 

Pretty much anything goes now as long as your smart (A relative of my OH turned up to his own sisters wedding in jeans though - a definite no no) Even black can be acceptable nowadays as long you don't overdo it. A suit could be perfect with a bright top underneath - plus you can wear it again. The only thing I would say is don't go too bright or bold if your wearing a dress as it's not too polite to upstage the bride when all eyes should be on her. Wear what you are comfortable in too, if you're 'breathing in' all day/night or wearing too high a heel you'll get pretty cheesed off. If your not sure of a hat, try a fascinator (Feathered clip) Good excuse to accessorise if you ask me!

 

Enjoy the wedding

[Ziggy]

Thanks everyone, I knew I'd get help here! Yes it is a formal wedding, hubby was all measured for his usher suit, though the men won't be wearing top hats (the groom thinks hats don't suit him - he looked great in a hat as my hubby's best man though). I hadn't even heard of fascinators, did some google search, they look lovely!!

Thanks for the advise so far, am looking at the link sent by Stoice, there is some inspiration there (I like John Rocha's things... maybe that'd be something to think about). It will be cold and also I will spend a lot of time at the church then at reception carrying and keeping my 2 year old in control, so I want something not too 'fragile' or easily crumpled...

 

I'll keep searching... and might come for more advice again too...

[A chickychickychick-ENN!!]

Hats are all about confidence. They make me feel 'weddingy' and sophisticated and are a lovely fun thing to try. There is at least one style out there that will suit you.

 

You can't really go wrong with a cloche:

 

 

They frame the face really well, work from autumn through to spring and keep you warm as well as looking classically beautiful.

 

And if you are near a Peacocks or Primark they do them for around the £5-7 mark.

So you're not breaking the bank while you're nervously breaking old style habits.

 

Why not take a friend shopping with you to advise? I'd say matching handbag and shoes, a nice hat and some good classic jewellery - pearls are always good - and some bright lippy - these are cheap, lovely, reusable staples for different occasions, and go with pretty much any dress or skirt/top combo. And they're not limelight-stealing from the bride.

 

Anna x

[A chickychickychick-ENN!!]

Ooh fascinators! You can get a circular straw 'hat' base from a craft shop, then H&M or other high street fashion shops often do hair clips with a lot of feathers on them for £2-3 each.

 

Fascinators can be silly money, but I made mine with about four posh feather clips and a base for under a tenner:

 

[chickenanne]

if you like hats, then a wedding is one of the few times you get to wear one, so go for it. If you're not sure about them, don't bother as most weddings, even smart ones, have more hatless ladies than hatted ones! Mother of bride/groom invariably will wear a hat, but general guests - not so much.

 

If you can find something you can wear again for other things then that always makes sense - that's a great advantage of winter weddings, I think!

 

But really, just get something you like and enjoy wearing - not jeans and not "black tie" and you'll not go far wrong.

[pepe]

I do like Next, they do some lovely things, how about a really nice hair accessory, monsoon have a good selection, also there are some beautiful pashmina type of things around, save wearing a coat! Good luck, I just love weddings

[redhotchick]

I hired a hat for my cousin's wedding last May. I do like to make an effort. On the day only me and my mum were wearing hats. Everyone, including the bride's mother had gone for fascinators.

I got a dress from principles. It is just below the knee and dip dyed going from Beige to cream at the hem. Fortunately it was a lovely day so no need for a cover up.

 

I have a lovely silk dress from Monsoon (I got it in a sale). It is a lilac/purple/white pattern all very muted. It is calf length, I have worn it for weddings, a ball, afternoon barbecue. It is so versatile. Well worth whatever I paid for it.

 

A pashmina over a lovely dress, sounds good to me.

 

Maybe some nice long gloves with a dress ring over too. Big dress rings seem to be very fashionable these days.

 

Debenhams have a free personal shopper service. There is no obligation to buy. You could try that if you have time. I did it recently and have had lots of compliments about my clothes.

[Olly]

oh yes - I'd forgotten the personal shopper service, but it's brilliant. I used it earlier in the year, and they were really helpful, and it's all brought to you so you don't have to keep dodging in and out of changing-rooms. All free, and they brought me a range of stuff in different prices - you could just be up-front about your budget anyway. They'll help you find accessories too.

[Ziggy]

ooooh... all these talks of monsoon and dresses, and the dresses pictured on the debenhams wedding clothes advise page, reminded me of something I have in my wardrobe...

It's the same as this, identical, but with thin straps. It's brown and below the knee, the bust line is quite high, not cleavage-revealing, and it is very, very comfy, and neither bride nor bridesmaid are likely to wear chocolate brown (I guess so anyway)... would this be suitable dressed up with accessories? (hat/feather clips/ bag/ coat or pashmina, obviously shoes, which I also need to buy cause my boots just wouldn't do!!)? I only wore it once so far for a xmas function, if it was suitable I could save the cost of the dress and concentrate on the 'finishing touches'... what does everyone think?

 

Here's the picture I found online : http://www.monsoon.co.uk/content/ebiz/monsoon/invt/15209424/15209424_m1.jpg

[stoice]

Sounds like a winner to me! Looks lovely. You can never have too many accessories in my book! Plus with the money you'd save from not having to buy a dress, it's a great excuse to buy a new pair of shoes!

[Ziggy]

Plus with the money you'd save from not having to buy a dress, it's a great excuse to buy a new pair of shoes!

 

I would lie if I said that very thought didn't cross my mind

Thanks!

[Guest]

are you sure the bride hasn't themed the wedding around browns and beiges (not that it matters really). Mine was all chocolate box colours

 

Love that dress but will it be warm enough? I'd be tempted to go for a simple, elegantly cut trouser/skirt suit, then you could wear boots.

 

If you need a pair of brown shoes and you're a size 8 and if you like them you can have these (for a donation to the BHWT). I bought them for my wedding but ended up going for another pair that looked more 1920s/30s.

 

Let me know if you're interested.

 

[Ain't Nobody Here]

I had exactly the same dilemma a year and a half ago. One of my oldest friends (and my bridesmaid) was getting married at a very posh venue. I don't do dresses, accessories or girly shoes so was panicing somewhat . I was also feeling a bit fat so wasn't looking forward to getting an outfit .

 

I then happened to be in T K Maxx and saw a dress I quite liked. It hid the bulges and looked quite nice and was a designer name at only £50. I then spotted a pair of very high heeled shoes in Cancer Research the exact same colour for £8.

 

I've never worn either since, but did feel good on the day . I didn't wear a hat!

[redhotchick]

Wow! That picture of a dress like yours took my breath away!

You'd be a knockout in that.

I'd defo go for something I already had, especially if I knew it was comfortable.

[Phonix]

Thats a lovely dress and you can get lovely shoes and hat/fascinator and jewlery in creams/golds to brighten it up a bit!

 

I love getting dressed up - got a course cocktail party soon so just bought a new dress from the Jane Norman outlet for just £22.50! well worth the trip!! And it'll be my first night out since sept not in fancy dress lol!

[Joojoo]

Don't forget Monsoon have got 30% off at the moment if you find anything in there you like. See Claret's thread... viewtopic.php?f=7&t=35662

[bigmommasally]

I think the dress would be perfect for the day with a contrasting jacket over the top, so you're not showing too much flesh in church, then you can remove the jacket in the evening ready for the dancing.

[A chickychickychick-ENN!!]

Wow - that's a killer dress! Love it! Pashmina and some semi-bling jewellery and strappy heels to go with it, I reckon.

[Ziggy]

Thanks everyone, I'll go for the dress, and some accessories, and something to keep warm... either a pashmina and a coat, or a good jacket... will go shopping next week (last opportunity before my girls break off from school) and hopefully get it all sorted. I like the suggestion of brighter accessories... black accessories would make the whole thing very dark (it's a wedding after all, not a funeral )

Thanks for the offer, Poet, but I'm a size 5. Those shoes have a lovely colour!

I'll have to post a picture of the whole thing together once I've got it all sorted .

[Ziggy]

Hi everyone, well the day came and went, and as I had promised to post some pics, here they are...

 

Thanks again to everyone who helped with advice and suggestions, the girls and I did feel great on the day in our outfits, and actually looked rather posh, my girls were probably the most dressed-up in the whole crowd (except bride, groom and their parents). OH was very when he first saw us... we are normally t-shirt/vest and jeans or combats kind of girls, all of us... so this was rather different!!!

 

Again thanks everyone, I was a little concerned when starting to plan it all, the advice was very helpful!!

 

 

[Egluntyne]

Super pictures. You all look simply gorgeous.

[Ain't Nobody Here]

What gorgeous photos . You all look beautiful .