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[fluffyfeet]

Has anybody on here ever been to a 'green' funeral, sometimes called Woodland burials?

My father in law left instructions that this is what he wanted and we have someone coming out this afternoon to discuss what is involved etc - but I was just wondering if anyone had been to one and what they thought about it.

Many thanks

 

Dawn x

[surferdog]

Hi Fluffyfeet, I've not been to one but have read about them. I believe they involve burial in specially designated areas of woodland that are kept free from traditional headstones, etc. People choosing them usually also choose more enviromentally friendly caskets such as wicker, etc.

 

I'm sorry to hear about your father-in-law. I too lost my FIL this week and am planning a funeral albeit a more traditional one.

[Olly]

Sorry to hear about your father-in-law.

 

A friend of mine works at the local Woodland Burial park, and so what I have to say is second-hand, but I have been there several times and it is an absolutely beautiful place, and most of my group of friends have now said that's where we would like to be buried.

 

The principle as I understand it, and I'm only going on the one where my friend works, is that burial is in a woodland setting. There are no headstones, but you can have a wooden marker, and some of these are lovely - not just plain wood but carved and inscribed, but no stone or metal is allowed - the idea is that in the fullness of time they will return to the landscape. Similarly, there might be a restriction on the sort of coffin used, a lot of people choose wicker or cardboard. My aunty had a wicker coffin, although not a 'green' burial, and it was really lovely.

 

Again, going on the place where my friend works, they have a hall which is used for services but its non-denominational - you can have whatever service you choose, so you could get a priest or vicar to hold it, or you could have a DIY one with family readings - it gives you a very wide choice, and you can have music and so on. In short, it can be like any funeral, it's just the final resting-place that is a bit different.

 

The other things is that they don't allow plants etc on the grave, you can use natural bulbs but they try to keep it to a woodland setting, of course you can lay flowers etc but they don't allow e.g. rose-bushes to be planted. Each one is probably different, and I'm sure whoever is coming to see you will explain their criteria.

 

I hope you are able to arrange a funeral which will be a celebration of your father-in-law's life.

[Egluntyne]

Sorry to hear about our Father in Law.

[fluffyfeet]

Thank you for your kind words.

My FIL had gone as far as copying various extracts from the Natural Death Handbook and highlighting the bits he wanted.

His first choice is Craven Arms in Shropshire, which is a beautiful place anyway, and there is a Victorian chapel and Quaker community nearby.

We can choose to have either an apple or cherry tree instead of a headstone at this particular site.

I saw a picture of a wicker coffin yesterday and it had flowers woven into the edge of the top and looked absolutely gorgeous - like a moses basket with a lid.

Having been to other relatives funerals where everything has always been quite sombre I think this will be much more like you say, a celebration of a life.

 

Dawn x

[Fizzle Knit]

My condolences to you, Fluffyfeet, and to Surferdog.

I haven't been to a green funeral but I did go to a scattering of a friend's ashes at a woodland burial site. The place was beautiful, peaceful and calm, and it felt very right, somehow.

In fact Olly I think it may be the one you know - at Epping. The staff were very welcoming there too. It's what I would choose for myself.

[Karen & co.]

So sorry to hear about your losses Fluffyfeet and Surferdog We have a woodland buriel area not far away, the undertaker was telling me about it last week, and they are supposed to be wonderful places.

 

I hope you are able to find a fitting resting place for him.

 

Karen x

[Olly]

Yes, it is Epping! It's lovely. They are keen to encourage people to view it as a natural amenity, not just as a burial place, and so they have regular music events there and my choir has sung there. You can also just walk through the woodland.

 

Fluffyfeet, it sounds as if your father-in-law has left you with some good ideas about what he wanted. I have sadly had the experience of arranging the funerals of both my parents, and we were very keen to make it a positive experience. Just a few ideas - my mother was 86 when she died and it was very important to me that neighbours etc who had only known her as an old lady, should know a bit more about her life. We wrote a sort of biography of where she was born, what she did in the war and what she enjoyed doing etc and the vicar read it out, and one of her granddaughters read a favourite poem.

 

At the reception afterwards we put up photos of her throughout her life, and this caused great interest not only from people who hadn't known her well, but also distant family members who recognised people and places! We had her favourite music, and we also chose not to wear black. You will work out what suits your family, but I certainly found doing this sort of thing a great comfort.

[Vivihen]

On 'It's not easy being green' the other night there was a section on cardboard coffins; a young woman had her coffin already in the house and her children had decorated it. There may be more information on the BBC website.

[Seagazer]

Sorry to hear about your losses Fluffyfeet and Surferdog.

[Yorkshire Pudding]

Sorry to hear of your FILs' deaths.

 

I haven't been to one either, but a friend's OH is a funeral director and has arranged several of these burials at the site near Doncaster. He says it is the nicest place he knows for a burial and that the people who have chosen it also tend to hold the 'best' funerals - those that celebrate a life as well as mourn a death. It's certainly what I would prefer for myself when the time comes! The idea of flowers woven into the coffin is beautiful.

[Goosey Lucy]

Hi Dawn, I am sorry to hear of your loss.

 

I arranged a Woodland burial for my mum a year ago. It was pretty straightforward as the cemetary in Cardiff has a separate area for such burials. The funeral directors sorted everything out for us. Mum had a simpe cardboard coffin which was satined to make it look less like a piece of flat packed urniture (apologies if this description offends anyone, gallows humour )

 

The main thing for us was to make sure that any flowers etc did not include non-biodegradable elements: no oasis, wire, plastic, polythene.

 

We found the service itself to be very simple and meaningful as it was lead by a Humanist preacher.

 

pm me if you want any other info.

 

It sounds as though your father in law had already had some thoughts about his final resting place which should make things easier for you at this difficult time.

[Guest]

I fancy one of these myself and I picked up some leaflets at a garden show last year. They did cardboard coffins which they put inside a wooden case for the on show bit before the cremation. Was all lovely and then there was the woodland setting bit.

[missuscluck]

Sorry for your loss. Its a very sad time for you. Its good that he left some idea of how he would like is send off. You will know that he will be having it how he would like.

I think these funerals look good. I like the idea of it. So much nicer.

[bluekarin]

I just wanted to add my condolences to you.

 

I really like the idea of the woodland burial and after googling it, it seems we are getting one near me. The school run route is also the main route the hurses take to the crem and I have seen a couple of them with wicker coffins in and I think they look beautiful. I certainly would prefer one of them to a wooden box.

[McChook]

Hi Fluffyfeet

 

I'm really sorry to hear about your FiL, but I'm pleased he had such a definite idea of the type of funeral he wanted - I work as a undertaker and so many times I sit in front of families who say 'we have no idea what he/she wanted'.

 

I have arranged quite a few woodland burials, mainly at Westall Park in Worcestershire, and they are beautiful events. Graveside services seem to be the most popular option, whether religious or non-religious. As Olly mentioned, no headstones are allowed - just small wooden markers, but this is a lovely way of marking a grave, I think. The variety of eco coffins is also growing, with wicker, bamboo and cardboard being the main materials used.

 

Please feel free to pm me if you have any questions (no matter how silly you think they are!)

[Cinnamon]

Condolences to all those who have recently lost loved ones.

 

I really like this green idea. I have long said that I don't want a funeral of any kind as I think them pointless, but the woodland idea appeals to me on many levels.

I am certainly going to look into this further.

[Ain't Nobody Here]

My condolences too to all who have lost a loved one recently.

 

This is all very interesting and, like Cinnamon, I'll be looking into this too.

[A chickychickychick-ENN!!]

Condolences from me to. I spent a lot of my life round Epping and it's an amazing forest. Such a lovely place for doing this. A dear young friend of mine died a couple of years ago and had a wicker coffin and quite a hippy, humanist funeral along these lines. It was lovely as it was exactly what she wanted. I hope the event is reflective of everything wonderful about your FIL.

 

A xx