4m x 3m Omlet pen, cube, new auto door still boxed and coop light

[Tottya]

Hi!

 

Im new here so thought Id start with a hello and thanks for the help this weekend with a chick problem!

 

Now Im having problems with my number one son whos 7 he has learning difficulties and I have been trying to get him assesed for 3 years and finally now hes being assesed! What I would like to know is can anyone tell me what help from the school should they be giving him? Still dont know what hes "labelled" with but it looks like ADD/ADHD. Anyone have any advice on how I can speed the assesment up as its taken 7 months now and only just had a conners questionair to fill out 3 weeks ago of which I have heard nothing

 

Many thanks for your time.

[LisaP]

Hi Tottya and welcome.

 

One of our children has ASD which for him includes dyslexia/dyspraxia and ?ADHD.

 

He attends a state Primary School and has a Statement of Special Educational Needs and we were lucky in that he was diagnosed at 2 1/2 years old but we've still found getting anything done very frustrating, so you have my full sympathy with that.

 

TBH it tends to be different according to which region you are in and under which council you come, so I can't give you any specific advice but what I can say is, don't be afraid to stamp you feet VERY LOUDLY and stay on the case We have to constantly chase our council when anything needs doing and in our case, everything is dealt with by a 'team' never anyone specific, so I usually find that unless you keep up contact you get very easily lost in the system

 

Owen's current school is very good and efficient and sometimes I've found that the council have notified them of something but not us He receives 1:1 support for part of the school week from an LSA who is paid for by the council on the basis of his Statement.

 

I wish you luck and don't be afraid to phone the council or whoever it is dealing with your son's case on a daily basis if needs be - don't be fobbed off

 

I'm sure a few more will be along with a lot more advice for you too.

 

Lisa P

[Seagazer]

My youngest had extra help for a few years from the SENCO lot and they still keep an eye on him. Our school is brilliant and I have never had to chase them to do anything in fact they were the ones that picked up some of his problems first (although I had already started the ball rolling with speech therapy). He has touch typing classes to help with his spelling and they used to do SALSA classes which is sit and listen classes and lots more.

 

In fact on a sad note the special needs teacher died on Friday and she was such a lovely lady, even though Jack has problems getting his ideas down on paper she knew without me saying that Jack is a clever boy, he takes everything in, he just doesn't write very well. We are all very sad, the Borough has lost a very special person in Jackie Pitt.

 

If I was you and you don't seem to be getting anywhere I would just keep pushing people, school, council, doctor etc. Good luck.

[chickencam]

I have only limited experience because my son sounds very similar to Seagazer's son. I can only reiterate that you have to keep asking questions and pushing on your son's behalf. The help is out there but unfortunately you have to ask for it.

 

My son still has trouble with large amounts of writing and his handwriting is pretty poor, he also had several years of speach thereapy and SENCO support through most of primary school. He is now 12 and at grammar school so his intelligence is no longer in question, they are pretty good at motivating and monitoring him because it is an all boys school and he is by no means not the only one with extra needs.

[Seagazer]

Chickencam - its great to hear that your son has done so well and that they are still monitoring him.

 

I feel worried for my youngest, he is only 10 and will sit 11+ next year. We know he has it in him to do well. He could pass the test but then I'm not sure he would cope with all the work (my daughter alway had so much work from the local grammar school whereas my middle child went to a secondary and got less homework than my youngest at primary ).

But you give me hope

[chickencam]

I think a lot or boys are late developers. He is reluctant where homework is concerned, but the school do mark orders every 6 weeks so we know pretty quickly if he is not pulling his weight. Up to now he has good grades from test etc putting him about in the middle of his form on ability but his effort grades are not so good. He is so proud of being at the school, but naturally quite lazy, he is improving all the time as he sees the fruits of his labours though.

 

I have an older daughter who is at the girls grammar and she is almost too conscientious, if I could mix their efforts that would be great

[Seagazer]

Wow your kids sound like mine. My daughter makes herself ill and upset at times because she works so hard. She is very hard on herself if she doesn't do as well as she wants. But she has always been like that.

 

My middle son is as lazy as they come, never puts effort into anything, apart from socialising. He's putting a bit of effort into his driving lessons though. Its his theory test on friday, I'm not expecting much!!!

 

I think the youngest is a mix of the pair of them. He gets very upset if he can't do his homework properly but quite frequently leaves it at school on a friday afternoon

[little chickadee]

Hi and welcome to the forum. My 6 yr old son is suspected to be autistic to some degree or another. He's supposedly being assessed at the moment, we're just waiting for the specialist to go into his school .

 

I'm afraid I don't know anything about ADHD, but I know that Janty does - maybe she'll pop along in a bit!

 

Good luck with everything.

[Aunty e]

My only advice is push, push, keep pushing and never stop. Don't let them give up on your child. Our LEA pretty much gave up on my little brother when he got to 14, and took away his specialist school place and sent him to a comprehensive where he was very quickly lost in the system. They managed to bully my mum into not making a fuss and the one thing we learnt from this is to bully right back. If you disagree, write to your local councillors, to the chief exec of the LEA, to your MP, take them to tribunals, threaten legal action. Make yourself one of 'those' people if you have to, your child only has one chance at their education.

 

With a bit of luck, you will have nicer local services than we do though

[Tessa the Duchess]

My youngest son had a special educational needs statement when he was 9, this was after 3 years of nagging from us He was transferred to a special school for mild/moderate learning difficulties and really got on well. He began to read, his writing improved and his concentration was much better. When it was time for him to go to secondary school the powers that be insisted that he would be able to cope in a regular Comprehensive with a bit of extra help in some classes. I knew he wouldn't cope and protested, but they insisted and he spent two years having a horrible time. He was hopelessly out of his depth, he had no friends, was bullied it all got totally out of hand. Finally I got my way and he was transferred to a lovely school, again for moderate learning difficulties, tiny classes, 2 teachers to each class of 8 pupils. He began to make friends and absolutely blossomed. You have to really battle to get what you know is right for your children

 

Tessa

[BarbaraJ]

Wow your kids sound like mine. My daughter makes herself ill and upset at times because she works so hard. She is very hard on herself if she doesn't do as well as she wants. But she has always been like that.

 

My middle son is as lazy as they come, never puts effort into anything, apart from socialising. He's putting a bit of effort into his driving lessons though. Its his theory test on friday, I'm not expecting much!!!

 

I think the youngest is a mix of the pair of them. He gets very upset if he can't do his homework properly but quite frequently leaves it at school on a friday afternoon

 

sorry i don't have much advice as not been in the same situation but i hope you get all that you/he deserve

 

i had to quote Seagazer as i'm sure position in the family plays a big part in how kids are.

My oldest daughter very consientious(sp ) lucky for her work comes easy too, at Uni at present

Middle son very able, was told at school he could do maths at Uni , dropped out of six formexcels at a social life flits through odd jobs seems to be floating through life aimlessly at moment but a lovely boy with it, luckily for him and doesn't ask for anthing.

Youngest daughter works hard at everything though didnt like school, did moderatly well, great for her, is at college now!

sorry o waffl on your topic but seagazers reply seemed so familiar!

[Seagazer]

Glad its not just me Barbara - hang on a minute - I'm a middle child! Crikey, wonder what my parents thought of me......

 

No my middle child is lovely, he's very funny, just bone idle I'm not though obviously, I keep busy watching the chickens and this forum.

[jellyb100]

Have you had feedback from the school about how they think your child is doing/their needs? Do they agree that he needs a statement of educational needs (ie funding for support)? If your child has been identified as having special needs he should be receiving some support in school some how.

 

I am a primary school teacher who has taught many statemented children and has been involved in trying to get a statement - feel free to pm if you like.

 

If the assessments have been done and you are waiting to hear about a statement, remember that you have a lot of power here. In the past it has been the parent's appeal that has got the funding for children as they sometimes just don't seem to listen to the school and educational psychologists that assess the children.

[Chicken Licken]

He may get a statement of special needs with hours attached. Some 1:1 support will help partculalry to develop concentration periods and manage completion of learning tasks. Also intervention from the ADHD nursing team who will develop consistent programs between home and school. Hmm Ritalin or whatever they call it these days works for some but not others. Nag the local authority and if you get nowhere get a private ed psych report done (costly but never argued against by local authorities with not enough EP hours). Be persistent and you will get there in the end.

[Yorkshire Pudding]

I work in SEN Tottya. Pm if you would like!

[Janty]

My son has ADHD and Aspergers syndrome. His Dad and I are both teachers and we suspected some time ago that he had Aspergers but the ADHD had never occured to us as although he has NEVER slept for more than two hours at a time , we have never had any behaviour problems. We went to the doctors and discussed our concerns (without son). The doctor then refered us to the local health authority. It only took three months before he was seen and the assessment process started. I always advise parents to go through their doctor as I feel the process is quicker. It gets me into trouble with the doctors at times but I then point out to them that we are all supposed to be working together.

 

Our son was diagnosed about three years ago and put onto a very low dose of ritalin. We were adamant that this was only going to be a months trial and we were not keen at all. However, it has transformed his life. He is naturally lazy but he attends a private school which sets lots of homework and expects children to attend silent prep sessions after school. Son copes with all this without LSA / Teaching assistant support at school. Hethen comes home, completes homework, does his ten minutes clarinet practice and ten minutes reading each night.

 

He does have the odd organisational blip at times but the school use the diary effectively to communicate each night with us and the teachers check his diary at the end of each lesson to ensure that he has written his homework in properly so that we can support him at home.

 

We see a lot of children at school whose parents make excuses for them because of their aspergers, ADHD, dypraxia,etc. etc. From experience, my advice would always be....

* Always set high expectations (obviously not over-bearing)

* Always encourage as much independence as they can handle. My son is 12 and can not cross a road but he can make a good sponge cake and his cooking is great.

* Never confront teachers, etc. in front of the children - you would be surprised how many parents do this. We, as parents have to talk to teachers about problems from time to time but some parents forget that children with difficulties can be naughty too. Confronting people in front of the child just encourages playing one off against the other and it really does work better when parents and teachers work together. We have seen this from both sides of the fence.

 

We expect Kop Boy (son's forum name) to achieve the very best that he can. He is gutted at the moment that although the achieved a level 5 in his Year 6 science sats paper, he is not in the top group for science. My response to him was that if he wants that then he is going to have to work for it. His response was to join a lunch time science club to try to improve his marks.

 

It sounds as if we push him but he gets a lot of rewards too. Being Aspergers, he has other problems and he is very black and white in his approach to life but he has firm boundaries which he responds to. People from the forum who have met him say that he's lovely and polite, he is doing the best that he can at school and he has as much of a social life as a child with autism can have. These are just my experiences. Sorry for going on so long.

 

Jan

[Yorkshire Pudding]

Tottya, when you say your son's being assessed, I am assuming that you mean medically?

 

The Conners questionnaire will also have gone to school and the teachers' observations will be collected in the same way as yours. It can seem painfully slow to get results and appointments at clinic. We too find that parents get quicker results by going to their GP than by the relatively slower process of referring through school's outside agency support teams. Where the parents are willing and able to go via the GP we encourage this.

 

If you ask to speak to the SEN team at your son's school they should be able to tell you what they are doing there to support him. For example, each child with SEN will be at one of the three stages on the SEN code of practice - either School Action (getting some type of extra help within school), School Action Plus (help in school plus advice sought from outside agencies and the agencies may be working with the child) or the Statement others here have mentioned. If school also have concerns about his progress there should be evidence of the support they have tried and he may have an Individual Education Plan describing the extra help they have been giving and the progress he has made.

 

It's very difficult to say what school should be doing without knowing your son, but if you have an open dialogue with the SENCO you will be able to talk about your concerns and see how they view him in school. Janty's advice is very wise - parents and teachers working together is definitely the best tactic.

 

I would suggest you consider all the advice you will receive over the coming months, even if you don't initially like what you hear. Some of it may seem to contradict what you expected, or think your son may need, or hoped would be available. Janty's son, like many students on the Code of Practice, copes with relatively little direct support in school (although I recognise he is quite a bit older). Also her reaction to the idea of medication is one we commonly hear from parents and always respect - I'm a parent too and wouldn't medicate my child without being sure it was the right thing to do. Some children don't really benefit, but other families find that it is a real godsend and allows their child to cope far better than they did without the meds.

 

We have over 350 students on our school SEN register and only about 30 have statements. Most cope well with differentiation and support from their mainstream teachers and some need further support from the Learning Support base, a few are supported by visiting outside agencies. Only those who really won't cope without LSA support reach the stage of Statutory Assessment for a statement. If your son progresses to this stage then there is a strict time limit by which the LEA must respond. I'd advise you to talk to your SENCO about whether your son is likely to need this type of support; it may be he never will, or only will for a while.

 

If you'd like an ally to guide you through the whole process and help if you need to have a difficult discussion with school, each local council has a 'Parent Partnership' who advise and support parents of children with SEN. You should be able to contact them through your council website.

 

Sorry to have rambled on a bit and I hope you haven't heard all this before!