Soggy run

[Ain't Nobody Here]

I hope you're proud of me - I just phoned her .

 

I'm off the hook for just now as she's waiting for Littlewoods to deliver an iron . She said my calling like this was "unexpected" so I said it was because lunch hadn't happened the other week.

 

I suggested next Thursday (deliberately mentioning that I'm working Mon, Tues & Wed - she probably still thinks I was sacked ) but she said that's when M is down (my brother). I suggested lunch with both of them on Sat and she agreed.

 

It was a bit stilted and awkward but at least I made the effort. I'm happy that I'll see her with M as backup and in a neutral location (which is what I wanted in the first place!).

 

Apparently a social worker is coming to see her tomorrow. He's "helping her write her autobiography". They are obviously branching out in their range of duties nowadays .

 

(She has written her autobiography btw - self-pitying and wallowing, need I say more . She got as far as me being about 3 years old - shows how important children were in her life.)

[Valkyrie]

Well done ANH anyway. Now remember to leave your boxing gloves behind when you all meet up.

[chickencam]

 

I bet that feels better, hope all goes well when you meet up. Just imagine that you are a pebble in a fast flowing stream and roll with it staying smooth and unruffled.

[Sheilaz]

What a useful thought, I'll try and be a pebble too.

 

Yes, ANH, I'm very proud of you. Stilted and awkward is fine, I think that went brilliantly.

That's great about the social worker, a step in the right direction.

Now, a clear 8 days to concentrate on other things, then brace yourself. Well done!

[Olly]

Well done - I think we're all proud of you anyway for unflagging cheerfulness in the face of persistent negativity!

 

 

Here's hoping it goes well next week. And if it doesn't, it won't be your fault!

[Helly Welly]

Well done ANH. I think it's great that your brother will be there and it's a neutral location. Take a hip flask so you can slip something strong into your coffee if necessary

[Couperwife]

oh, well done ANH, im impressed next part will be fine too, its in a busy place so you can "zone out" and look around the cafe if she gets too much

 

(((hugs)))

 

cathy

x

[Space Chick]

Well done ANH, you know that you've got the support of your Omleteer friends behind you

[Chook n Boo Mum]

Great news ANH, I've been thinking of you all day & hoping all went well.

 

If you need a "get out quick clause" could you arrange for an unknown (to the others) friend to pop by whilst you are having lunch..with your mobile number so they can ring with a "problem" only you can deal with if you tip them the wink.....or get DH to call to check you are ok & you could excuse yourself neatly after that if needs be.....just a thought Hopefully you won't need it, and it may be better on your jangly nerves than leaving without a "good enough" reason.

 

Sha x

[Ain't Nobody Here]

Like on a blind date . Not a bad plan - I'll hatch a plot .

[Reikiranf]

Good for you ANH! Perfect your plan because if you know you have an easy get out if things get uncomfortable, it will make the lunch easier to deal with.

 

Hope it goes well

 

Amanda. xxx

[Valkyrie]

My neighbour (similar problems but with both parents) hasn't been well - gynie and now lung problems due to asthma, which needs sorting - her dad who is over here from the US surprised her by saying not to worry - he'll be back next year to stay with her for 3 months! She is worrying herself silly because she reckons she will have to put him straight even though it will cause a family rift. She feels guilty because of his age, but he is a very demanding man and very domineering. He has already told her that he will have the spare room and is inviting his friends to stay before asking her! Like you ANH she is losing sleep and therefore making herself more ill. Caught between a rock and a hard place springs to mind.

[Ain't Nobody Here]

Best laid plans . My brother isn't down this weekend after all. His ex-wife insisted he take one of the kids this weekend (not his usual w/e ).

 

Mum hadn't mentioned to him that I'd phoned .

 

I'll try again in 3 weeks or whenever he's down next.

[Olly]

Oh well - at least you were willing to try!

[Ain't Nobody Here]

Just an update for my "blog" ....

 

My brother was down this w/e. He waited till Sunday morning to tell me but asked if he could come round this pm.

 

She's apparently no better. He tried suggesting lunch yesterday but she didn't want to. She's still convinced that this all stems from my yelling at her during the phone call in January . (In fact, she told one of the care staff that we weren't speaking but whenever we do, I just yell at her .)

 

She's been conned out of more money . A gardener was working in the back and a bloke came to the front door and asked for the payment. She gave him £140 but he was nothing to do with the gardener . What a chancer . Police and victim support have been involved (she was very pleased to be the centre of all the attention, apparently). My brother actually wonders if it happened like she says but we'll never know .

 

I asked if she was happy to never see me again but he says she blows hot and cold on that. He thinks she won't want to admit that I'm not the nasty, aggressive person she tells people I am and seeing me will perhaps make her have to do that.

 

I have a cunning plan however . My very good, long-time friend (who mum likes - although hasn't seen for about 15 years ) says she'll come with me if I see mum. So I'm going to phone a couple of days beforehand, say we're going to a garden centre, May was asking after her and wondered if she'd like to come along.

 

If that doesn't work, my brother is going to try getting the carer woman mum thinks is just fantastic onside. She might be able to persuade mum to meet with me (with her there too).

 

If that all fails .... well, I really think that will be it finished (I know, I've said that before ). For once, I'll have proved I can be as stubborn as her .

[Valkyrie]

Cor your mum could try the patience of a saint! Don't be too quick to step into the saintly shoes though!

My mum was a bit narked that I went walking with Jlo - "you don't want to walk with me though" huff huff huff. Then I had one of my old friends over the other Friday while OH was out until late. She rang that morning and DD answered the phone and she asked to come over. I said that was OK, Carol was here. Oh, then I won't come after all" "OK come tomorrow instead then" "Goodbye" and put the phone down on DD - who said she was very clipped with her. Garghhh. I'm too old for "Please mum can I have a friend over to play with?" Then she wouldn't speak to me, so I thought fine, you stew for a while and I'll call later in the week. As it happens her darling son-in-law went round and buttered her up and she was all sweetness and light when I next called.