How many chickens in Eglu Cube

[jackiepoppies]

You are doing so well....never, ever think you are a 'saddo'.

You are being what we all aspire to be.......a mature caring person who is doing her very, very best for the people she most cares about.

It's not surprising you still love him....he's the father of your children and the person you hoped to share the rest of your life with. That person doesn't exist any more. Trouble is you can't love the person he's become or what he has done to your family. That always hurts but it's not your fault. Don't waste any more energy on anger than you have to. You will need every ounce of energy to stay positive....and we're with you all the way.

Stay strong,

 

Jackiex

[redhotchick]

Mrs B. It's so hard. You don't just fall out of love with someone.

It's hard on you, it's hard on your beautiful children.

I've been on the sidelines watching my niece in tears going home with her mum, while my brother is trying to hold it together. It is very upsetting. Do try and maintain relations between him and the children. It is difficult to start with and harsh as it may sound, they, and you, will get used to the coming and going.

On a practical note, where can he go each time he meets the children? (other than McDonalds). Are you really prepared for him to come into your home, as you try and adjust to being separated?

Everything I think of at first would cost money, eg. swimming pool, roller skating, but there are other things.

Free museums will probably lose appeal quickly, although one by me has great children's activities especially in half term etc. A trip to the library to choose books for the week is free and libraries do lots of things for children these days.

In the better weather, days out and picnics may be an option.

He might thank you for ideas (maybe not) I hesitate to say this, but joint days out might even be fun for everyone. (probably not all the time)

Each family's situation will be different and you have to do what feels right for yours.

Thinking of you and trying to be constructive

[Plum]

Hugs for you Mrs B and your kids. xx

[Phonix]

Mrs B i can't really add anything but just wanted to send you big ((HUGS)) for you and the children

 

xXx

[jackiepoppies]

Todays positive vibes and huge hugs coning your way.

Stay strong. You will come out the other side.

 

 

Jackiex

[Mutrix Farmers]

Big hugs coming your way fom Margate.

 

In your heart you know you have done the right thing. In the long term he would have made all of you very unhappy, including the children. They are too little to realise it now but when they are grown up and he is still a sad alcoholic, they will be amazed at how fantastic you have been and how fortunate they are that you are their Mum.

 

Never forget you are a very special lady!

[Paola]

Hang in there Mrs B (((((hugs))))))) xx

[chickenlass]

You may not think or feel you are strong...but you ARE.

Take one day at a time . Sending a gentle hug.

[Paola]

I have been thinking of you lots this afternoon Mrs B since I last posted. It is HIS actions that have put you in this position. I agree with Mutrix Farmers. (((((((HUGS))))))))) xx

[chickenanne]

Mrs B, am so sorry to hear how tough it is for you; it must be horrific. But you are doing so well. If I could say anything useful I would...

You'll get there, this will pass.

[clootie]

Hang in there Mrs B. You're getting through the pain barrier - it will get easier, honest. Keep going. xxxXXXxxx

[Olly]

Can't offer much advice, but hang on in there - it does get better.

Of course you still love him - how much easier this would all be if you didn't! But you and your children have put up with enough - you're putting them first, and hard as it is to see them sobbing when they say goodbye, they will get over it and get used to it.

 

Lots of positive vibes, and keep coming on here to talk about it.

[Cate in NZ]

Sorry to catch up with this Mrs Bertie...it does sound like you've been having a truly difficult time .

 

You and your family are very much in my thoughts and sending you all the positive vibes I can muster to help you through this. Good luck.

[Lesley]

Well done Mrs B. I know it will be no comfort to you whatsoever, but things will get better in time. Reading your posts brings back to me a lot of miserable memories of being in the same position when my children were small....

 

...that was 15 years ago and my children are now two wonderful, well-balanced adults and I am happily married to an amazing man.

 

BTW - If anyone had told me when I was where you are now that the future would have held any happiness for me, I wouldn't have believed them for a moment so I don't expect you to at the moment either, but I'll be thinking of you while you're waiting for the good days to come!

 

I could have written that myself HennyPenny! - except mine was 30 years ago!

 

One, rather twee, phrase I've remembered along the way is "This too will pass...." - attr. Eleanor Roosevelt (I think) - it applies to all situations, both good and bad.

[Karen & co.]

((((hugs))))

 

Karen x

[jackiepoppies]

Youv'e got yourself and the children through another week, congratulations.

Remember, children are one of the most adaptable creatures on earth and you are giving them a far more stable environment than they've had for a long time.

Todays hugs and positve vibes winging their way to you over the Channel!

 

Jackiex

 

Edited to say I kept thinking how you are 'nurturing' your children in the best way you know how, so I looked up the official definition. Says it all doesn't it?

 

http://www.thefreedictionary.com/nurture

 

Jackiex

Edited January 16, 2009 by Guest

[MedusA]

Oh dear. Only just catching up with the forum. I take it he blotted his copybook with the drinking again, so you told him to sling his hook?

 

I am so sorry, as I know you wanted to make it work, for the children's sake if not your own.

 

You know you have our moral support, and I hope, for your sake. your ex comes up with the financial support you are due. Hang on in there hon. *hugs*

[jackiepoppies]

The start of a new era BeckyBoo........

 

ALL THE LUCK IN THE WORLD

 

Jackiex

[Groovychook]

Loving the username BeckyBoo!

Best wishes xx

[baby bears mum]

One day at a time honey that's all you can do. Children get used to things amazingly quickly and bounce back from the most horrendous things (unlike us I'm afraid). It will take time but never feel a saddo. I am exactly the same. I find it hard to let people in but you do find the most amazing coping skills when you need them (trust me ).

 

Sending you and the kids loads of positive vibes and lots of hugs

 

Take care BeckyBoo.

 

Love

 

Helen x