jenuk99 Posted October 23, 2007 Share Posted October 23, 2007 Hi all I came out of a long term relationship in Feb and have been trying to get back out and meet people, have also tried the online dating sites. Just wondered if anyone has any hits or tips, feeling very out of practise. Thanks Jen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paola Posted October 23, 2007 Share Posted October 23, 2007 Just be yourself Its been a while since I dated Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karen & co. Posted October 23, 2007 Share Posted October 23, 2007 Hi A friend of mine is in the same situation, and has tried a few on line dating sites, one of them is seeming to come up with more suitable matches, but I can't for the life of me remember what it is I think it may be something like parent.net , but I'll ask her, you don't have to be a parent, but she chose it hoping it would weed out some of the 'stranger folk' out there. (her words not mine!) The couple of matches she has had seem to be reasonable, although she hasn't introduced them to us yet karen x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theherd123 Posted October 23, 2007 Share Posted October 23, 2007 I agree with Paola - be yourself and smile - be happy in your own skin! I probably should be writing this on a forum but what the heck my brother isnt likely to read it! My brother has been using Dating Direct for a while now but cant find a date who isnt a ladette - he is fed up that there dont seen to be any nice ladies out there who actually dont mind being treated like a lady! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenuk99 Posted October 23, 2007 Author Share Posted October 23, 2007 That is the website I am using, have had one date from it. Thought it went really well but now he doesn't seem interested. They are definately a different species. Jen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theherd123 Posted October 23, 2007 Share Posted October 23, 2007 You could date my brother if you like! GSOH Tall, athletic build Brown hair and eyes Lives in own flat Can cook Likes sport Am i doing a good job of selling him? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paola Posted October 23, 2007 Share Posted October 23, 2007 I like being treated like a lady Shame I am married Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenuk99 Posted October 23, 2007 Author Share Posted October 23, 2007 He sounds great where does he live? And does he blow hot and cold after he has met someone? Jen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tina C Posted October 23, 2007 Share Posted October 23, 2007 Jen can't help much on the dating thing, but am impressed that Emma has taken up the cause and introduced the omlet dating service! (Her brother does sound quite nice) A few people I know seem to be getting together with old girlfriends at the moment - anyone in your past that you would like to meet up with again? Good luck with your quest - it might take a while, but you will meet someone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UkButton Posted October 23, 2007 Share Posted October 23, 2007 Hmmm I find drinking works well (alot of my replies seem to feature this I may have a problem) The advantage is if you end up with a wreck you can blame it on the drink... Or is this just a blokes perspective? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egluntyne Posted October 23, 2007 Share Posted October 23, 2007 You could date my brother if you like! GSOH Tall, athletic build Brown hair and eyes Lives in own flat Can cook Likes sport Am i doing a good job of selling him? Has he got his own teeth? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Olly Posted October 23, 2007 Share Posted October 23, 2007 sorry Jen, I can't help ... I've tried a Guardian ad (met a lovely guy who is still a friend), unfortunately I also met a few weirdos. It's very time-consuming picking up voicemail, deciding who you want to contact, ringing them, arranging to meet them ... and there's nothing worse than going to meet someone and just knowing immediately that it's not going to work - I am too polite to stand someone up, so you have to go through an excruciating 30 mins or so of chatting, having a coffee/drink whatever, and make your getaway. I've tried a couple of internet sites but just never seemed to find anyone that I felt a connection with ... it doesn't help that a lot of men seem to want women who are younger than them and slim (despite the fact that, judging by the photos, some of them were not so gorgeous themselves ) I do agree with the 'be yourself' comments above, but that doesn't actually help you meet available men! I have just given up - the longer I'm on my own, the more I like it, and there are a lot of compensations. I'd rather be on my own than in a bad relationship. I do suggest mentioning chickens in your ad, though! I'm sure it would sort out the wheat from the chaff! good luck! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 I chucked my hubby out over a year ago now and I still don't feel I'm really ready to get out there, I have browsed the online sites and felt disappointed at what guys are looking for. When I was trying to hunt down a colleague who said he did online dating on a Christian site I looked at them and commented to another colleague who is a desperate bunny boiler that a lot of men on there actually list that they are looking for a serious relationship leading to marriage and kids. Its another avenue you might try. I also looked at some sites where they arrange formal dinner dances which I thought would be more my style than hopping down the pub for a pre-arranged meeting with a stranger. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karen & co. Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 I've just remembered my Father used Nexus when he felt ready to mix again after my Mum died, and they used a group dinner set up, so there was a mix of people. Another option could be a night class? not particularly female based ones but something you fancy doing anyway, and meeting someone may be a bonus karen x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cate in NZ Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 Another option could be a night class? not particularly female based ones but something you fancy doing anyway, and meeting someone may be a bonus That could be a good option. I am in a relationship (well, I'm sticking with hubby until George Clooney wakes up and realises what he's been missing ), so wasn't looking for anyone else. But I did genuinely want to learn bricklaying, we needed a little wall building and I baulked at the price quoted by local builders. So I signed up for a bricklaying course about 18m ago now, and it was great. 18 men, 1 instructor and me . There was the usual mix of old and young, but none were wierdos, we all had a good laugh, and had I been out looking for a new relationship there would have been a couple of possibles in the group I also built my own little wall, and came to realise that maybe I was better sticking to the day job. I did go on to do a short domestic plumbing course as well though So maybe looking at something that you'd like to do might help with the initial meetings, gives you something in common to start talking about, you can always enlist a fellow student for help in explaining things or the physical bit (knocking up muck......... I hardly ever had to do my own ) and you will learn a new skill, you might make some new friends and there's always a chance that you'll meet someone special Good luck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Louise Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 It is a nightmare I have been single for 5 years now The only blokes I seem to meet want the young blonde slim model rather than someone independant with their own house lkife and job Like Olly the longer I am on my own the more I like it I can't be bothered with an overgrown child who wants to be looked after and a man who just wants to have some fun without any proper strings doesn't seem to exist No matter what the male of the species leads you to believe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
craftyhunnypie Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 If you are of the more middle aged ' mature' type, then Solos or The dinner Club might be suitable. Quite costly though, as they do weekends away with a dinner dance evening. Very nice & friendly. I only know as we used to do the dj ing for the discos for them! Other than that - try selling a bit of stuff ( mens sort of stuff) & then when they come your house to collect it, if they like you - they already have your number! I met my hubby by buying a car from him!!!! he he he We just clicked! Tickles me to death now, lookinf back! Emma.x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 Long time since I dated and I wasn't even looking for someone when Phil came a long I probably should be writing this on a forum but what the heck my brother isnt likely to read it! My brother has been using Dating Direct for a while now but cant find a date who isnt a ladette - he is fed up that there dont seen to be any nice ladies out there who actually dont mind being treated like a lady! Emma's brother is gorgeous... such a sweetie and polite enough not to laugh at me when I was dancing around, not realising that he was standing behind me Em, if he does DIY too then I'd be interested! Good luck Jen, and be yourself. The trick is not to try too hard. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenuk99 Posted October 24, 2007 Author Share Posted October 24, 2007 Wow what a support team you all are, so many kind words thank you. I have just moved to my new house and work full time it just seems so hard to meet people new. Will try following your advice, and where does this nice sounding brother live??? Jen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bronze Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 I think we can now say Emmas brother is no longer single. Afterall one of you lot has to be right for him. Shame I'm married ....... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Louise Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 I think there may be a queue forming Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 Lucky boy! Now, now ladies... keep it orderly! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popcorn Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 Just caught up with your plight Jen. It's a minefield isn't it. Me and my girlfriends all got married around the same time, unfortunalty one of marriages didn't work, and my friend has been single ever since. She been an absoloute inspiration to us all in the meantime. She's really happy in her own skin and is quite happy to go on any blind date we might fix her up with, and she regularly goes on internet dates. Some have lasted a couple of dates, others a few months. She's still not found Mr Right (she's very fussy in her old age these days!) but she always enjoys and makes the most of her dates and if they don't work out she doesn't dwell on anything, or blame herself. If she's had a nice time, then she enjoys the memory, if she didn't, it's a learning curve and time to move on. she's always out and about on dates, up to two a week sometimes from her internet agency. She always honest with who she meets, and if she has other dates liined up and they ask, she tells them. I think the trick is not to take yourself too seriously, enjoy the date and don't blame yourself if things don't work out. There's someone for everyone. It just takes some of us longer to find them. I wish you lots of luck and fun on the way Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theherd123 Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 I think we can now say Emmas brother is no longer single. Afterall one of you lot has to be right for him.Shame I'm married ....... No he is still free and single and lives in Saddleworth! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted October 24, 2007 Share Posted October 24, 2007 I was trying to remember where he lived. I can't understand what a lovely lad like him is doing single and lacking in female company - is he fussy Emma? Mind you, there's fussy and fussy - after all, he did have breakfast with us mad lot - deserves a medal for that! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
