Nacktschnecken omlet Cube

[Geoid]

[Space Chick]

Lewis that is absolutely brilliant

 

You have made me and Phil laugh out loud

 

I have recently had the pleasure to have a sales call from a man from N Power, when he asked what he needed to do to make me interested, and I replied that even if he got a naked Brad Pitt around to my house to operate all me light switches I still wouldn't switch.

 

He laughed, saw the funny side and said "You really don't want to switch so you!"

[Cooks]

Lewis that is the best laugh I have had in a while

[Valkyrie]

 

Love it - especially the £300 on his credit card - that really cracked me up!

 

Well when Brad Pitt calls round in the nuddie you will need to let us know for moral support of course

 

OH had a call the other day - he described it as "cheeky" which is an understatement. It was on the business line and the woman asked for him (his full name) so he said "speaking" so she says "oh I didn't recognise your voice", so he thinks who the heck is this and asks her. She said so and so from some company and that she spoke to him before and would he like to continue with getting whatever it was that she was trying to flog. He said he didn't speak to her at all. Her answer was "yes it was about 4 weeks ago". His reply was "well no I didn't because if I did you would know that I wasn't interested then and I'm still not interested now" and put the phone down. He was so cross because she pretended she knew him he didn't stop going on about it all evening (until he started catching flies on the sofa).

[Lewis]

 

Thats only half of it. I love messing with them because they never know what to say if its not in their script ... try it some time

If they ask do you want double glazing or insulation ...

Can you double glaze and insulate a caravan?

 

Would you like broadband at X speed ...

This is a phonebox (and yes, before you say it Freda, I know you can get broadband in phoneboxes)

 

 

I'd like to remind you Sir, this call is being recorded.

Well you phoned, me so I don't have a problem, do you?

Well no, but ...

So why mention it then?

[ClaireG]

Lewis thats brilliant!!

 

I have an over excited 10 year old here, he's driving me potty!! Monday can't come soon enough. The fleeces will be staying in Koojie but i think i'll be ending some extra t shirts.

[PurpleTree]

That's brilliant Lewis, it made me laugh. I hate it when sales people phone me, and ask how I am, as if they care.

 

My best so far, was when I used to live in a flat, and got phone calls asking if I'd like a conservatory, I'd say I'd love one - I live in a flat. They'd automatically assume I lived on the 5th floor or something and go away very quickly. I nicked that trick from my grampy, who incidentally lived next door - both ground floor flats

[Scramble]

 

Very good, Lewis

 

Ahh, the weekend

Got my Chemistry results back today..section 1 , 94% ... section 2, 92%

Basically a 93% average, I am

[Space Chick]

JJ, keep up the good work on these test results honey and you be matching your sisters GCSE results.

 

Well done

[Griffin]

The purple isn't as purple as it should be Red is very red and I'll take pics in the morning before I go to work. Mr Griffin has purple hair too It looks lovely. I've asked him to indulge me by completing the look with eyeliner. He said some rooood words

[Cooks]

I dont think any amount of fluttering of my eyelashes would convince my hubs to dye his hair purple.

 

Thinking about the double glazing/conservatory callers, my dad had one on the phone a few years back now, he said he had nothing better to do so happily listened to what the man had to offer and what he was offering dad said he was very interested in all the correct places so the man ploughed on... right at the end he said so Mr ***** would you like one of our representatives to come round and finalise things.. dad then said, well let me first speak to the Council and get them to approve it and as long as they will pay I can go ahead..

 

the man was dumbfounded.

[Scramble]

Aw, thanks Debsie.x

 

Oooh, piccies Griffin

 

@ CM

 

I was listening to Mika's We Are Golden earlier and mum said 'We are golden? Isn't that something by Joni Mitchell?'

[Lewis]

 

A bit different, but my brothers friend phones and she bores me (I tell her, don't worry ) and just says "Is ****** there?", obviously I say yes, then she doesn't reply, so as she hasn't asked me to go and get him ... I dont I put the phone on the side and walk off

The worst thing is, she'll still be there after 5 minutes

[Valkyrie]

Lewis! I thought you were a nice boy! There's an evil little streak there!

 

Yes, I have "you have won a prize" and sometimes I go "ooooh how delightful - I'm not interested thank you" and one time a lady tried to argue with me and I told her (not unlike OH) that I don't enter competitions so I couldn't possibly have won anything. Another woman argued with me saying that I had done a street survey and virtually called me a liar, so I put the phone down on her. Sometimes they are very rude. Other times, for instance Mike at BT who was more than likely not a Mike at all, was very nice and I had a very long chat with him about my music appreciation and how I like different music around the world - have no idea how we got onto the subject but as they were paying for the obviously international call - I didn't mind. I think we chatted for about 20 minutes - I hope he didn't get the sack for running up a big phone bill because he was very sweet.

 

Can't wait to see those piccies Griffy

 

Hey what happened to our party nights? Should we have one tomorrow (night Debs - just in case ) - I seem to remember saying that if mum wasn't coming today then she could come over on Saturday. I still didn't call - she must be fuming away.

[Valkyrie]

I once rang my friend when she was living at home and her dad answered. I asked "can I speak to your daughter please - it's me" and he said he didn't think she was capable. I thought what has she been up to then, and he said his daughter was only 9 months old. Oopsie wrong number, but we did have a laugh - I said I would be happy to chat to his daughter too.

[Lewis]

Lewis! I thought you were a nice boy! There's an evil little streak there!

Evil? No chance

 

Said boring girl is upstairs now, she just bursts into my room and expects me to 'entertain her' and then doesn't understand why I chuck her out of my bed when she gets in

[Valkyrie]

Crikey! What a cheek. Oi get out of Lewis's room you brazen hussy!

[Geoid]

Lewis! I thought you were a nice boy! There's an evil little streak there!

Evil? No chance

 

Said boring girl is upstairs now, she just bursts into my room and expects me to 'entertain her' and then doesn't understand why I chuck her out of my bed when she gets in

Entertain, eh...

[Valkyrie]

Fred has a point there (oh dear that sounds wrong too )

[Scramble]

 

Sometimes I begin to wonder if I'm the only sane person on this thread

[Geoid]

 

Sometimes I begin to wonder if I'm the only sane person on this thread

This is the crazy thread....

[Scramble]

 

Imagine the look on Lewis's face when he reads this

Edited September 25, 2009 by Guest

[Lewis]

Nothing like that

[Valkyrie]

Where's your karaoke machine then Lewis?

[Lewis]

Ooooh, Fred would say different would he? And why would he think you were insane JJ? Hmmm, care to spill the beans .. . You and Fred? .

*cough*

 

Where's your karaoke machine then Lewis?

I have one behind me! I just use it as an amp for the radio mics