Single hen

[Christian]

Actually, ring bearer and petal scatter is a more accurate description for me!

[Cate in NZ]

Phew

[Guest]

I just distrust religion in general, it seems to cause too many conflicts in the world. That's not to say I don't believe in 'god', I just don't think I need a set of rules to tell me how to be a good person or have to go to a specific place to talk to him/her/it.

 

I was brought up a catholic and was scarred for life by being told, when I was little, that everything I did was a sin and I'd get a black mark on my soul for this, that and the other. I went to a convent grammer school and some of the nuns were horrible and I've met some very odd and TBO quite scary overtly religious people in my time.

 

Buddhism seems to have its good points but I prefer to strive to be a decent person in my own way.

 

Well, I don't think I'm a scary religious person! (Those who have met me, do tell me if I'm wrong!). I don't need a church to tell me a set of rules either. I go to church to share my faith with others who are also on a faith journey. It is a strengthening experience.

 

I am sorry you have a bad experience Poet, it seems to me your story is quite common in the Catholic church. Other denominations are completely different in their approach and I believe people have to find the right church for them, be it Baptist, Methodist, URC, C of E or any of the other churches around.

 

This is probably a bit outspoken for me. I live my faith but I am not a do-gooder or a preacher!

 

I agree entirely that the church is people not buildings, but I love the history of them and I wouldn't want to sell off the wonderful artefacts that many have. I love putting my feet where countless others have put theirs.

[Jules.]

Spot on Helen- the "church" consists of people, not buildings. The early church used to meet in houses for a few centuries.

A church building can't go & visit someone in hospital, or show friendship, or kindness, or love!

 

Here's a link to the church we are members of http://www.brynbaptistchurch.org/

The site is still under construction, so some pages don't work but we are on one of the photographs- hiding away in the wing on the left hnd side! Stuart is behind the girl wearing blue on the front row, & my parents are to his left. I'm hiding away at his right.

 

Someone once said that church is the only "club" that exists not for its members but for its non-members!

[Jules.]

Love the photo Jules... but how could you have married a man with HAIR!?

Because I have a thing for blond men

[Olly]

Someone once said that church is the only "club" that exists not for its members but for its non-members!

 

Gosh, that one has made me stop and think! (and smile).

 

Someone else once said that going to church doesn't make you a Christian, any more than standing in a stable will make you a horse!

 

It's actions, not words, that make the difference. My experience is that most churches in this country are very poor and yet they strive to provide a great deal of support and help to local communities, often in areas that are not covered by other agencies.

[Ain't Nobody Here]

Do you all think nature or nuture has more do to with whether you are religious or not?

 

I am a complete atheist - I don't believe there's anything/one "up there" and when I die I'll be quite happy being worm food (if they eat ashes, that is ).

 

My half-sister is in the middle of her training to become a minister . She so doesn't look like a potential minister (gsoh, long blonde hair, tall, slim, elegant, effortless dress sense - we could be twins - not ). Not that ministers aren't allowed to look good but it's not generally the image that springs to mind.

 

My birth mother was pretty religious as was my other half sister (sadly dead now) so both girls were brought up with the church.

 

My adoptive mum was the opposite.

 

So ... if I'd been brought up with my "real" family, would I have ended up as religious as them .

[Egluntyne]

My adoptive mother was a religious nutter. Statues everywhere, holy water fonts, rosary beads.

 

I am a total cynic about the whole thing. Him Indoors is quite religious and I go along with him from time to time.

 

I find it a complete bore.

 

Most of them are here to get their children into the rather good schools. Their attendance drops off for a few until they are looking at the secondary schools and then lo and behold, they are on their knees again.

 

There are some lovely people too.

[Cinnamon]

 

I am a complete atheist - I don't believe there's anything/one "up there" and when I die I'll be quite happy being worm food (if they eat ashes, that is ).

 

Likewise.

 

I am a non believer & I know I always will be.

Anyone elses beliefs is their own business I think - live & let live.

I did marry in charch,but for the tradition,not the religion.Also at the time there was only the Registary office alternative,which didn't appeal.

My SIL has married into a very devout Catholic family, & it saddens me to see her raising her children to be followers rather than leaders ,but hey, thats her choice however much I don't agree with it

[Ain't Nobody Here]

Luckily, my half sister and her husband (also very religious) are lovely people and genuinely do good and kind things for anybody they can. They give religion a good name . Also luckily, they are quite low-key about it and don't try to convert me and OH. We actually have a laugh about it when it does come up (which isn't often).

 

Last time we visited them, we all went to church (first time for my kids since they were christened - I know, don't ask ) and they found it extremely boring and very cold (as did I ).

[bronze]

I think the difference is between having a faith/belief and being religious.

[gooner.girl]

I think the difference is between having a faith/belief and being religious.

 

Couldn't have put it better myself Bronze. 'Religious' people tend to be found more (though not always) in denominations such as Catholic and C of E - cos thats what they were born into and they don't see it as a faith/way of life but just going to church on a sunday cos thats the thing to do (though before anyone jumps down my throat there are plenty of proper Christians in both those types of churches too - i am not denying that)

 

I am a christian but i would hate to call myself 'religious' - that to me means a whole list of formalities and doing things for the sake of it.

 

At my church today we sat on chairs in a school hall, the guy leading (not the minister) wore jeans, shirt and jumper and we sung a wide variety of songs (and a few carols) led by a group playing piano, guitar, drums, violin, flute, bass etc. We didn't read prayers out of a prayer book or sing out of hymn books though we did pray and sing. It was really relaxed and informal. Thats the way i like church personally.

 

So many non christians have the idea that church is always in a proper building and really formal with some person in fancy clothes at the front talking at them. There are so many different types of churches around that there should be something to cater for anyones style, taste and personality - yet on the telly church is always portrayed as something for the elderly - dry and dusty and dead but there are lots that are not like that at all.

 

If you think church is boring try your local baptist or pentecostal church (and there are even some more lively URC's and C of E's out there to if you look hard enough! ) The problem is when a church is about real faith - not just religion, its more challenging and people may find it uncomfortable because it should be filled with the helper God sent - the holy spirit who wants to work in people lives and thats not always easy - giving your life to God and letting him take control - people don't want to do that. But it is worth it when you do... In more formal 'religious' churches i suspect that part of the trinity is largely ignored...

 

*steps down off soapbox...

Edited December 30, 2007 by Guest

[theherd123]

OH was brought up as a Catholic and has lapsed now (as quite a few do)

 

Im the more religious one of the two of us and when we got married we did so in a C of E church, (I was christened and confirmed in C of E) OHs father was horrified and asked what his son was doing 'throwing his lot in with those heathens for'. I bit my lip at the time but swore if he ever came out with a comment like that again he would see a different side to me all together!

 

And what makes it worse was that was coming from a man who had never seen the inside of a church Catholic or otherwise for at least 25 years!

[gooner.girl]

Do you all think nature or nuture has more do to with whether you are religious or not?

 

I don't know about whether either makes you 'religious' or not. i suspect if you have an overly religious family it could put you off religion - and sadly having a proper faith to.

 

I grew up in a family of christians and faith but there came a time i had to make a decision for myself about whether i was just following my parents beliefs or whether it was real for me to. I chose to believe it was real but i know plenty of people who have grown up in families of faith who have decided its not for them and i also know plenty of christians whose family aren't christians at all..

[Egluntyne]

Well said goonergirl.

 

I don't have any particular beliefs, but I went to a funeral earlier in the year which was conducted by a methodist minister.

 

He was young, funny (but appropriately so for a funeral) and an inspirational speaker, and I found myself thinking .......I could do this.....if I had any strong beliefs.

 

Having been brought up in the Yells, Bells and Smells variety of religion, it made a refreshing change.

 

 

The best philosophy for life in my opinion is "Do as you would be done by".

 

You won't go far wrong with that.

[Cinnamon]

My family were not religious in any way & I can count the amount of times I have been in a church on one hand probably , most of those being for weddingds or funerals.

 

Helen,what you have said is quite right,there are young & funky ministers out there who make religion a different experience for younger people, & I am glad this is the case.......its really refreshing.

 

Its just not for me

[Snowy]

There have been some really good comments in this thread. It is good to see people respecting others beliefs without condemnation. I sometimes find it hard to tell people that I am a christian as some do automatically assume that I will be very religious and try to convert them! I don't do that!

 

Personally, I dislike religion. Our church is more like Goonergirls - it was what drew me to a faith in the first place, seeing people who genuinely wanted to serve others without any religious pomp and ceremony (although that is nice occasionally ).

 

We do have a nice little church - but it was bought and paid for by it's members, not by any larger organisation. And it's the members who pay for the day to day upkeep, repair and running costs. And we pay the wages of the minister every week. If we don't give, he doesn't get paid. We open the church building for all kinds of activities and events in the village and don't charge for it's use. But the costs of that come out of my friends and my wages every week, no one elses!

[Guest]

In more formal 'religious' churches i suspect that part of the trinity is largely ignored...

 

I wonder what your suspicions are based on? I have many friends in C of E, Catholic and Baptist churches and that is not what I see or share with them. It is not our role to judge others, only ourselves!

[gooner.girl]

In more formal 'religious' churches i suspect that part of the trinity is largely ignored...

 

I wonder what your suspicions are based on? I have many friends in C of E, Catholic and Baptist churches and that is not what I see or share with them. It is not our role to judge others, only ourselves!

 

I am not saying that this happens in every church Ginette and i am not judging. i just think it is sad that some christians don't quite grasp exactly what fullness of life they can have in Jesus.

[Guest]

The problem is when a church is about real faith - not just religion, its more challenging and people may find it uncomfortable because it should be filled with the helper God sent - the holy spirit who wants to work in people lives and thats not always easy - giving your life to God and letting him take control - people don't want to do that. But it is worth it when you do... In more formal 'religious' churches i suspect that part of the trinity is largely ignored...

 

*steps down off soapbox...

 

 

I have been part of the worship in many denominations - in fact I cannot think of a denomination offhand that I have not been involved with over the last 40-odd years - and my experience is that no Christian expression has a monopoly on the Holy Spirit...

 

I have found the Holy Spirit just about everywhere I have gone. The Holy Spirit (in my experience) isn't picky about formal/informal buildings and isn't impressed by formal robes or jeans and t-shirts... The Holy Spirit isn't fussed about whether an organ is used - or guitars and drums - or unaccompanied plainsong...

 

(that's my experience anyway)

 

The Holy Spirit is around when people gather together genuinely in God's name in any place or time - dressed in any way you care to mention - but gathered to "do justice, love mercy and walk humbly with their God" (Micah being my favourite Old Testament prophet...)

 

Phil

[gooner.girl]

Of course he is everywhere Phil - i am not denying that - i am just saying some christians/churches involve him more in their worship - prayers in tongues, prophecys etc then others thats all.

[Jules.]

 

The Holy Spirit is around when people gather together genuinely in God's name in any place or time - dressed in any way you care to mention - but gathered to "do justice, love mercy and walk humbly with their God" (Micah being my favourite Old Testament prophet...)

 

Phil

 

We had that verse mentioned by our visiting speaker today as he prayed before he brought us the Word. He said that there's a difference between saying prayers & praying.

Anyone can say a prayer, but praying is being "real" with God. Vinny Commons wore a shirt & jumper, (for the record!)

He spoke on the two thiefs on their cross at the same time as Jesus - about how the first thief who said to Jesus "if you are the Christ then save yourself & us" completely missed the point of who Jesus is, and how people today don't realise who He is.

 

I can get a copy of the sermon on CD if anyone would like a copy.... just PM me. Vinny is very easy to listen to, I like the way he uses the word "folks " alot!

He's speaking again tonight at our evening service. He has alot to do with Preston Northend young footballers- for all you footy fans out there.

[Guest]

Sort of the final nail in the coffin for 'religion' for me was when we went to see the tryptic "The Adoration of the Mystic Lamb" in Ghent cathedral.

 

Another magnificent holy building stuffed to the rafters with priceless bits and pieces. The final straw, for me, was there was an admission fee to go in to the room where the painting was kept! I turned round and walked out, I left a donation on the way out because I CHOSE to, but I was sickened that I couldn't just see the painting without being forced to pay a fee. So wrong!

 

Doesn't stop me believing in 'god' or whoever is 'up' there, I just think, by and large, mankind and their greed have made a mockery of 'religion'.

[Tessa the Duchess]

Egluntine wrote:

 

My adoptive mother was a religious nutter. Statues everywhere, holy water fonts, rosary beads.

 

Mine too Did you have to say the 'family' rosary every night Egluntine?

I seem to have spent most of my childhood on my knees in some religious service or other. I never believed in any of it even as a young child I was bored bored with everything about it. The last straw was when my father became a convert to Catholicism when I was about 10, I told my mum I didn't want to go to church anymore, and I didn't, I imagine she prayed for me every day I hope I'm tolerant of other people's faiths whatever they are, just as long as they don't preach to me. I do agree that many church organisations pick up the peices when government agencies fail, my oldest friend is a very devote methodist and her church does fantastic things for both young and old.

 

Tessa

[Snowy]

I just think, by and large, mankind and their greed have made a mockery of 'religion'.

 

I agree Poet, and that is where a lot of us tend to go wrong, by putting our faith in man rather than God