soapdragon Posted March 18, 2013 Share Posted March 18, 2013 (edited) At the school Spring Fair on Saturday I won a voucher for an overnight stay and breakfast at a reasonably s"Ooops, word censored!"y hotel in Hampshire worth around £140.00. I never win things and so was absolutely delighted. However, when I got home and discussed the whole thing with OH my delight suddenly seemed misplaced. Having looked at finances we won't be able to use the voucher; we have no childcare and another room for the boys would be £140.00 plus their (and our) supper - not sure I'd want to go without them anyway. Taking into account petrol and anything we wanted to stop off and visit on the way there or the way back and lunch too we would be looking at spending a minimum of approx. £250.00. This is totally out of the question as we have to replace my car by the end of August, when the tax runs out, as it won't make it through another winter. We also need to replace another three windows in the autumn as they are rotting. So, having decided that we can't use the voucher, I don't know what to do next! Obviously I need to talk to someone from school (raffle was arranged by the PTA so I think its a matter of courtesy to explain why we can't use it as it seems rather ungrateful!) But what do I do then? Do I put it on E bay or see if any of our friends want to make us an offer (I was thinking of around £50.00, IF we go down that route) or do I give it away (if so, to whom?) As you can probably tell, we are very strapped for cash but is it wrong to make a few pounds out of this? I feel very torn and also very ungrateful but we just can't justify the cash (even if we did find someone to have the boys it would still cost us around £100.00.) I now wish that I hadn't won - everyone will be asking me if I have booked/did I enjoy it and I'll have to come clean. What an ingrate! What would you do? Edited March 20, 2013 by Guest Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
freddie Posted March 18, 2013 Share Posted March 18, 2013 Try ebay, or put it in the paper/fb. You Won it. It's yours! These things used to worry me to death, but now I just do the thing that's right for me and my family; and if you need the dosh for a car, then do that.. If it had been a scratchcard, and you'd won £150 on it, would you have given it back? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cinnamon Posted March 18, 2013 Share Posted March 18, 2013 I agree ..... Once it is yours,it is yours to do with what you want. The PTA will have made their money & the hotel can well afford to give away a few free nights .... So do with it what you like,but do check that you can pass it on first,as there may be rules about that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soapdragon Posted March 18, 2013 Author Share Posted March 18, 2013 Good point, Cinnamon! The voucher just says something like 'the winner' and so is neutral but it does say 'From the Friends of (Name of School removed) School' but I can't see that mattering as anyone could have bought a ticket - we were all told to flog as many as we could to anyone who wanted them!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cinnamon Posted March 18, 2013 Share Posted March 18, 2013 Personally I think you should avoid eBay with this one, as there are all sorts of potential problems with terms & conditions, use by dates & so forth. Sell it privately if you can. At the very least you don't have the worry of selling it to a stranger who uses it,then goes through PayPal disputes to say they were not able to use it/it never showed up, which I have heard of happening before. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
majorbloodnock Posted March 19, 2013 Share Posted March 19, 2013 Personally, I'd have a quiet chat with the chair of the PTA. The PTA is, after all, a good network of acquaintances in itself, so may be a good vehicle to find someone else who'd like the voucher, and if you tell the chair the reason, (s)he can then spread the word in more generic terms that you and (s)he can agree in advance; you may get plenty of "Isnt' it a pity it doesn't work for you", but no-one need know if the reasons are financial, logistical, personal or otherwise. It's also the case that the need to rehome the voucher and the reason it needs rehoming will spread at the same time, so you won't have to keep repeating yourself. Oh, and just for the record, you're not being in the slightest mean or ungrateful. You're applying sound common sense and thinking ahead, and I wish a few more would do the same. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alis girls Posted March 19, 2013 Share Posted March 19, 2013 Lets face it i it was a pack of bath cubes in a highly fragranced scent you wouldnt hesitate to pass it on would you? its yours and you are not being mean. Hope u manage to pass it on. Is it worth asking hotels if they have any last minute reduced specials for the bit you would have to pay. We always kept costs down by if we were in a hotel going to supermarket and buying our lunch. Fish and chips and takawys are cheaper than sit down meal in most cases. I dont know the age of your children. good luck which whatever you decide. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patsylabrador Posted March 19, 2013 Share Posted March 19, 2013 Does it have to be used very soon? Could you pop it away just in case you get an unexpected time alone with OH, or swap it with a friend / relative for something or just a gift if you want to cheer someone up. If there's no time limit I'd be inclined to hang onto it just in case I could use it and that probably is mean! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soapdragon Posted March 19, 2013 Author Share Posted March 19, 2013 Thank you all for wise and kind words - I feel better about it now ! I will talk to the treasurer of the PTA (who I know reasonably well as her daughter is in ES's class) and explain - as my lovely lift partner has been doing the honours so far this week I have not yet made it into school but will be there tomorrow! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alis girls Posted March 19, 2013 Share Posted March 19, 2013 Hope you have a windfall and can use it. Sometimes we need a treat. i have had a few winnings in my time, vouchers, a lovely designer handbag now RIP and lavender bathcubes (love lavendar but this would have made me itch ) Never won anything big. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soapdragon Posted March 19, 2013 Author Share Posted March 19, 2013 Hope you have a windfall and can use it. Sometimes we need a treat. i have had a few winnings in my time, vouchers, a lovely designer handbag now RIP and lavender bathcubes (love lavendar but this would have made me itch ) Never won anything big. That's part of the problem! I never win anything other than a travel bottle of shampoo on the bottle stall and am so disappointed that I couldn't use this lovely surprise! Other prizes were a huge bottle of wine, cinema tickets for 4, a colour analysis session and a huge choc egg all of which I would have loved ! Heyho, such is life! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted March 19, 2013 Share Posted March 19, 2013 Such a shame that you can't use it (well done for winning by the way) I agree that you ought to revert to the PTA in the first instance; either they will be able to come up with an idea, or might even suggest that you try to sell it. Glad to hear that you're being prudent and budgeting for your more essential items Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soapdragon Posted March 20, 2013 Author Share Posted March 20, 2013 I checked today with the person on the PTA who had organised the hotel voucher and she says that, if I cannot use it, then it has to be returned to school to be the head prize in the next raffle (for Maypole later this year.) According to her the terms on which it was donated means that it has to be taken by the winner so I can't even offer it to another parent. Feeling glum Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cinnamon Posted March 20, 2013 Share Posted March 20, 2013 That doesn't sound right to me - surely by next years raffle it will be out of date. Could the PTA possibly be trying to wangle themselves another good prize for the next raffle at your expense. Plus,who would know if you were to gift it to someone? I once won tickets to see a show at a local & VERY posh supper theatre near to me & I gave them to my in laws for Christmas,because it wasn't our scene. As far as I am concerned once something is mine,it is mine to do with what I like! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soapdragon Posted March 20, 2013 Author Share Posted March 20, 2013 Yes, I thought it would be mine to do with what I want but apparently not! The next function is in June so the voucher will still have 3 months to run. Guess who won't be buying any tickets next time round! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
freddie Posted March 20, 2013 Share Posted March 20, 2013 Hmmm. Green eyes?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soapdragon Posted March 20, 2013 Author Share Posted March 20, 2013 Hmmm. Green eyes?? No, just totally hacked off that the one bit of luck that we get during a very tough time doesn't work out and leaves us feeling worse; the boys got all excited and we have had to explain that we can't go - they don't understand that we need a car/windows more Wish I'd not bought the wretched tickets Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Couperwife Posted March 20, 2013 Share Posted March 20, 2013 just a thought... could you contact the hotel and ask them if you could swap the prize of the room for a meal for 4 so you could all go? its pants that the school want the prize back cathy x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soapdragon Posted March 20, 2013 Author Share Posted March 20, 2013 Thanks for that Couperwife but I think the idea of the room and breakfast offer is so that the winner then BUYS the dinner, which is probably where they make their money! Also, the parent who has organised the voucher is very 'difficult' and tho I would ordinarily argue my case, her daughter is in ES class and so I will be standing outside class with her for the next 3 years and just couldn't handle any unpleasantness. However, when everyone starts asking me whether we have booked I will explain the situation and say that I had to give the voucher back Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chook n Boo Mum Posted March 20, 2013 Share Posted March 20, 2013 Speaking from the hotel's side....when we gift a prize voucher to a school or association, it is simply "the bearer" who can use it....there are no other stipulations beyond any dates to be avoided and how much it's for/what it covers...so if you wanted to come to an arrangement with someone else so they could take advantage of the prize and made a donation towards something you will benefit from, that is entirely your decision. I feel the PTA bod has let a little bit of power go to her head Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
freddie Posted March 20, 2013 Share Posted March 20, 2013 That's what I meant by green eyes. I did my stint on PTA just on commitee years ago, and wouldn't do it again for anything!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soapdragon Posted March 20, 2013 Author Share Posted March 20, 2013 That's why I am a Govenor rather than on the PTA Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bluekarin Posted March 20, 2013 Share Posted March 20, 2013 Would it be worth contacting the hotel in question and explain your predicament and see if they can be helpful? Maybe for a small price you could upgrade to a family room? It would be such a shame for you all to miss out on this wonderful time away together, especially as money is so tight. You don't need to eat dinner there, it depends where the hotel is depends on what you'd want to do dinner wise. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soapdragon Posted March 20, 2013 Author Share Posted March 20, 2013 We did call the hotel and ask about family rooms but I don't think they are very family friendly! We were quoted £140.00 b&b or £190.00 dinner, b&b for another room hence our decision. Equally, I don't know what the connection is with the hotel and PTA mum who organised it - it could well be her family/friend and, as previously mentioned, I will have to face her daily in the playground for the next three years so just don't feel its worth it. We have resigned ourselves to losing the prize now but did enjoy the initial euphoria! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bluekarin Posted March 20, 2013 Share Posted March 20, 2013 That is terrible! I wish I has some other suggestion so you can all go. I feel very disappointed on your behalf Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
