Elderly cat breathing difficulties when purring

[Ain't Nobody Here]

By the way, some of you might be interested in this - I've installed a programme which gives you the power to limit the time your kids spend on the PC. Unfortunately there are some teething problems which means it doesn't always work but when it does it's brilliant. You can set it to an amount of time or to only work from say 7-8pm. You have to set up separate accounts but that's no problem.

 

It's called Ez-Off and only cost £15 so I'm prepared to persevere and hopefully get it running properly.

 

I know a version of Windows (Vista?) has a vaguely similar built-in programme but I only have XP.

[Guest]

By the way, some of you might be interested in this - I've installed a programme which gives you the power to limit the time your kids spend on the PC. Unfortunately there are some teething problems which means it doesn't always work but when it does it's brilliant. You can set it to an amount of time or to only work from say 7-8pm. You have to set up separate accounts but that's no problem.

 

It's called Ez-Off and only cost £15 so I'm prepared to persevere and hopefully get it running properly.

 

I know a version of Windows (Vista?) has a vaguely similar built-in programme but I only have XP.

 

 

we use one called Watchdog. Unfortunately it doesn't run properly under Vista - when we only had XP - then I could network all the PCs (we have four in the house ) so that it didn't matter which one they were using - it would still count against their time. Now my PC has vista - watchdog won't recognise it in the network - so it kinda counts as free time when I am out for my oldest...

 

best thing about wtachdog - and there are several others (if you google "Parental Controls") is that it stops them arguing who's turn it is.... Middle son loves watchdog = cos his brother can't con him out of time.

 

there are some that run on Vista - but finding one that will run properly on Vista and network several machines has not proved so easy!

 

My kids have played all the runescape/WoW games mentioned - and, frankly, I'd rather they were doing that than playing Grand Theft Auto - or smoking outside Budgens (which Carys saw her 11 yr old former friend doing today...)

 

they are a bit nerdy - but they read more than any child I have ever known - PCs and consoles are not mutually exclusive with books or learning..

 

parents have always - to some extent - been frightened of the things their teenagers get up to - gaming is just the latest... (and it's better then glue-sniffing!)

 

Phil

[Imo]

Saw the title of this and just had to check it out I seem to be on the only teenager posting on this, and feel I'm a lone voice out there shouting out for us littleuns.

Firstly, 3am is way too late to be on the computer, especially during study leave. I've never got that caught up in video games or anything of the sort, but I think the internet and games like that can become quite addictive. And I think it's right to punish your son the way you did - I'm not good at parenting advice, ( ) , but the way i see it is that he's still under your roof so it's still your rules!! I still do what my rents tell me

But, just because I feel I have to say something, us teenagers aren't all that bad. Every morning I read the paper, there always seems to be something in there about the youth of today messing their prospects up, doing criminal damage or whatever. I'm not saying that this is right, but I'd like to point out we aren't all like that We're not scary, uncontrollable or born to rebel. Any given impression of a person or clique of people is going to mould them - if you keep saying someone is bad, that's all they'll ever think they are. The amount of pressure teenagers are put under at school is enormous - exams almost every year, pressure from teachers to do well academically, social pressure from peers whether that be to follow the crowd or to do what is the right/sensible thing and risk being laughed at for it, not to mention all the other pressure to complete extra curricular activity to round us into complete human beings And all that and an influx of hormones that seperate us from kids and from adults - it ain't nice being stuck in limbo

Now, this is completely unrelated to the issue re:gaming, I just felt I had to stick up for us littleuns

Half the problem with teenagers that go 'astray', in my eyes, is that they don't face up to the consequences. If they don't do their homework, let them fail a mock exam, put the wind up their tails. It's the only way one can learn sometimes - through hard work and perseverance and first hand experience, rather than nagging and unfulfilled threats. By giving your son guide lines and letting him know that his behaviour is in your eyes unacceptable, he'll learn. But go easy on him

Sorry for my miniature rant I felt it a duty as a teenager!!

[fairy&cake]

my little one is NOT going to have computer games, my cousin is doing a research PHD in to the effects of them, and i think they are too dangerous.

 

I DONT Think you overreacted at all! He should know better at 15! When i was 15 i was working and was too tired to play at 3am!

 

Get him a weekend job, he'll soon be too tired!

[Couperman]

I was going to quote IMO but it would have taken too long.

 

So I will just agree, I remember being that age and sneaking out of bed in the middle of the night for my PacMan fix.

 

Young adults get a bad press far too much. Yes lying is bad and honesty is the way forward.

 

But every boy should learn that lying has it's uses and it's often necessary and "Ooops, word censored!"le to lie.

 

'Does my bum look big in this?'

 

'Does this dress make me look fat?'

 

Those are just two examples where even an accomplished liar would struggle. It gets even worse if you happen to not be lying and are just giving and honest opinion of 'no, you look great'

 

Anyway, everyone knows teenagers these days are far too busy tending to their allotments to get involved with Warcraft.

 

Kev.

[Ain't Nobody Here]

Good mini-rant, IMO. You are a shining example of an intelligent and articulate teenager .

 

I would like to say that, like you, my ES is one of the good guys. He works hard at school, rows very successfully for his school in national and international regattas, is kind to his family (with the exception of his little brother ) and our pets, has a great sense of humour, seems very happy to spend his free time with his family rather than going out and is generally a joy to have around. He's 6' 2" and is still content to have a cuddle with his mum .

 

We're leaving the passwords in place but have let him have his time on the PC tonight and have moved on to teasing him about his night-time antics .

 

(I used to listen to Radio Luxembourg under the covers till goodness knows what hour . I won't admit what I got up to when my parents went away and left my big brother in charge .)

[theherd123]

 

But every boy should learn that lying has it's uses and it's often necessary and "Ooops, word censored!"le to lie.

 

'Does my bum look big in this?'

 

'Does this dress make me look fat?'

 

Kev.

 

You do make me giggle!!!

[Guest]

my little one is NOT going to have computer games, my cousin is doing a research PHD in to the effects of them, and i think they are too dangerous.

 

I DONT Think you overreacted at all! He should know better at 15! When i was 15 i was working and was too tired to play at 3am!

 

Get him a weekend job, he'll soon be too tired!

 

 

Hmmm..... I remember well visiting a young couple who wanted their baby baptised. As we chatted I joked about the low shelf that went all around the sitting room crammed with little porcelain ornaments..

 

"You'll be moving the shelf then when he starts to walk!" - I said

 

"Oh no!" they replied "we'll be teaching our little Herbert not to touch things that he shouldn't."

 

"Ahhh..." I said, "good plan..."

 

I visited again a year later.... the shelf was gone........

 

Phil

[Cinnamon]

my little one is NOT going to have computer games, my cousin is doing a research PHD in to the effects of them, and i think they are too dangerous.

 

 

Hmmmmmmm

 

In my mind its more dangerous to say a complete 'no' to something & be totally firm on that without taking into account the sort of person your child will be when they are a Teen, & giving a bit of leeway.

You risk them child being seen as differnet or weird by withdrawing something that all his peers will have access to, & this may be more harmful in itself.

 

Computer games are not all bad. They help the motor skills, life skills & some of them even train the brain.

Warcraft is a great game from what I have heard, & I think that the way to go on this one is to set limits rather than complete bans.

[Tessa the Duchess]

my little one is NOT going to have computer games, my cousin is doing a research PHD in to the effects of them, and i think they are too dangerous.

 

 

Hmmmmmmm

 

In my mind its more dangerous to say a complete 'no' to something & be totally firm on that without taking into account the sort of person your child will be when they are a Teen, & giving a bit of leeway.

You risk them child being seen as differnet or weird by withdrawing something that all his peers will have access to, & this may be more harmful in itself.

 

I'm afraid I agree with Cinnnamon on this Laura. I refused to let my elder son bring certain DVD's into the house, ones that were doing the rounds of his peers, I considered them too violent. He just watched them anyway round at his friends' houses The forbidden becomes even more desirable, best to give a bit of leeway but keep an eye on what is going on.

 

Tessa

[Ain't Nobody Here]

my little one is NOT going to have computer games, my cousin is doing a research PHD in to the effects of them, and i think they are too dangerous.

"Dangerous" is perhaps a bit strong. Some computer games are unsavoury, for want of a better word, but the problem is not necessarily the game itself, more the character of the player. A teenager who has a sound moral base and participates in a good range of activities usually plays these games as a bit of light relief from the stresses of school & life generally. Playing computer games for hours on end, whatever the genre, is often the main cause of subsequent bad behaviour.

 

I have heard research that says that the game itself is not the issue, it's the frustration levels caused by inability to complete a level, say, or beat a top score, that makes children behave badly. Tetris was shown to cause as much frustration as violent computer games.

 

Banning your child from playing ALL computer games denies them the chance to be entertained, educated and develop geniuinely useful skills.

 

I agree with others, you are in danger of either alienating them from their peers or making the banned object much more desirable. Letting them see or play the latest DVD or game under supervision is a much safer way to go.

 

Hope you don't think we're preaching, Laura (well, perhaps RevNev is ) but I think we've all thought "MY child's not going to do THAT" only to realise that things are not that easy.

[Paola]

Hope you don't think we're preaching, Laura (well, perhaps RevNev is ) but I think we've all thought "MY child's not going to do THAT" only to realise that things are not that easy.

 

Sounds familiar I always said "no child of mine would ever have a dummy", that was before I had a baby that screamed and howled all hours of the night. A dummy was the only thing that would settle her I have got to the third child and he has been known to share the dogs chew when he first started to crawl

[Egluntyne]

my little one is NOT going to have computer games, my cousin is doing a research PHD in to the effects of them, and i think they are too dangerous.

 

 

Hmmmmmmm

 

In my mind its more dangerous to say a complete 'no' to something & be totally firm on that without taking into account the sort of person your child will be when they are a Teen, & giving a bit of leeway.

You risk them child being seen as differnet or weird by withdrawing something that all his peers will have access to, & this may be more harmful in itself.

 

Computer games are not all bad. They help the motor skills, life skills & some of them even train the brain.

Warcraft is a great game from what I have heard, & I think that the way to go on this one is to set limits rather than complete bans.

 

I agree with Cinnamon too Laura.

 

Re ANH's son, I agree...3am is far to late for him to be on the computer. With the best will in the world He would not be functioning well the next day.

 

I would be more concerned about the fibbing than anything else tbh.

 

Keep talking to him and you'll not go far wrong.

[Ain't Nobody Here]

Not sure if I made it clear that ES had actually gone to bed at about 10.30. I kissed him goodnight . He said he woke up at about 2am and couldn't sleep so went on the PC. I said perhaps getting up for a drink of water, smoothing the bedcovers out and even reading for a bit would be a better plan.

 

It was the sneaking about in the middle of the night that annoyed us, rather than the actual computer game.

 

He has accepted his punishment with good grace and humour and even helped me clean out the girls' run this morning .

[Egluntyne]

He has accepted his punishment with good grace and humour and even helped me clean out the girls' run this morning .

 

Good lad. You can often get a bit of mileage out of these little hiccups!

 

Compared to what some get up to ANH it is the twittering of little birds.

[Geoid]

3am! I would be too tired to stay up! I like sleep

 

But games are great! Good for letting off stress too.

[Cinnamon]

3am! I would be too tired to stay up! I like sleep

 

But games are great! Good for letting off stress too.

 

Yes Fred, I agree that games are important, as is the time to do whatever you want when you are a teen.

My daughter will lie in bed until midday at the weekends, then stay up until late chatting online,but I have tried very hard not to interfere in this & allow her this bit of 'me' time.

It seems to be working & she seems to appreciate what I am trying to do for her. She actually came & apologised to me for being up until 11.15 last night when I had said 11(ish) for bed. She didn't know that I was asleep already & didn't have a clue what time she had come up!

For a child that communicated in spikey grunts just 2 weeks ago, an apology is a breakthrough. Long may it last

[Geoid]

us teenagers aren't all that bad. Every morning I read the paper, there always seems to be something in there about the youth of today messing their prospects up, doing criminal damage or whatever. I'm not saying that this is right, but I'd like to point out we aren't all like that

Well said, I totally agree with you!

[Ain't Nobody Here]

I quite agree - and I've edited the title of this post to reflect that fact .

[Seagazer]

I agree too - I know lots of lovely teenagers, from the giggling girlfriends of my daughter to the increasingly large friends of my son

[hillfamily]

I have to say, I have 2 teenagers and whilst there are times were I could quite happily disown them , on the whole they are great kids who have a good sense of right and wrong :D

 

 

 

and whom I love to bits

[hillfamily]

I agree too - I know lots of lovely teenagers, from the giggling girlfriends of my daughter to the increasingly large friends of my son

 

know exactly what you mean - my son and his mates have just overtaken me (and that's something as I'm 5'11") not to mention the collection of size 11 shoes that gather by the door when they all visit

[Egluntyne]

not to mention the collection of size 11 shoes that gather by the door when they all visit

 

Scary aren't they! I'm surprised they don't need planning permission for some of them.

[Lesley]

not to mention the collection of size 11 shoes that gather by the door when they all visit

 

Scary aren't they! I'm surprised they don't need planning permission for some of them.

 

Oh No! I well remember the shoes!!! - my son has been 6'2" since he was in his teens as well....... sometimes, you can't open the front door for monster sized trainers

 

Jazz has given up trying to run off with my son's shoes - she just eats the laces now

 

Teenagers can be such hard work to keep on track - but the job is very rewarding

[Karen & co.]

It's a bit like that here too, my eldest has been over 6 foot since year 9 and now at 15 is nearly 6'3" most of his friends are tall too.

 

Sometimes when I open the door, it looks like a flotilla of canal barges have sailed into the hall

 

Karen x