KAZAROO Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 Today I have been humiliated in public; Its almost as bad as being mutilated...lol Did not realize such Taboo's still existed?!?!?!? Especially as it was in M&s of all places. Whilst packing my shopping; I politely asked if there was anywhere in store I could discreetly breast feed as my month old son was wailing! The cashier ( A lady in her 40's at a guess); looked me up and down and at the top of her voice said "That Madame; I would not know as I am an owner of cats"; To which I politely replied " and I; an owner; of kids". She then called over another Cashier... and still at the top of her voice; relayed my request again... I ended up traipsing to Mother-care as this is the only place apparently suitable in our town So my question is.... How do you feel about breast feeding in public? Not necessarily you personally; but mothers who do it!?!?!?!? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenuk99 Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 What has being a cat owner got to do with anything??? I would complain about her you made a polite request and she sounds extremely rude! definately on your side on this one. Jen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clootie Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 I'd be complaining to M&S about catlady. The way she spoke to you was dreadful. Do it - they might even send you a voucher to say sorry !! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laurmurf Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 Hi Kazaroo what a fab topic, something I get evangelical about! I fed all 4 of mine whenever and where ever I - and they - wanted me to (much to the disgust of my MIL ). As a trainee breastfeeding counsellor at the time I was desperate for a 'fight', I had my arguments all made up and ready to dish out... The only comment I ever received was from an old dear in a tea shop who stopped over while I was feeding my twin boys (as discreetly as possible with my Dolly Parton-esque frontage), who said: "ah, how lovely"! I never did get the chance to get on my soapbox in public. That was 13 years ago; surely this battle has been long fought and won?! As I'm a grumpy letter writer, I would write to the M&S customer services manager at that store for their comments on your treatment; that will stir things up beautifully and get some staff training in place! Even employment law now officially recognises the importance of providing peace, quiet and storage faciliites (if necessary) for breastfeeding mums - M&S could at least provide something a bit better than bigoted and old fashioned attitudes! Keep up free ranging those Kahunas ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tessa the Duchess Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 I definitely think you should complain. Breast feeding is the most natural thing in the world, I have no problem with women doing it in public, I do think it should be done with modesty though Tessa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jules. Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 I think it's really hard to stand your ground when you are full of hormones- my sympathies to you. I actually cringe when I see people shoving a bottle of artificial milk into a baby I can't imagine why anyone who can ( and not many people can't) breast feed choose not to do so Breast feeding can be done with the ultimate discretion ( says she who has BF in front of her FIL) It's the best thing for babies, & I say go for it, wherever you are. I did. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Olly Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 I'd be absolutely furious - complain to M&S, that 'cat' comment is absolutely insulting (and I speak as a cat-owner, and also as someone who has never had children and never will now) ... breast-feeding is what they are intended for, not for parading on Page 3 of the Sun. You go girl! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenuk99 Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 Well just had a look on their website and of course it has no references to anything useful, except its full of being accessible to all. Now that woman did not make the store very accessible to you, so go and compain! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egluntyne Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 Complain. If they want to keep their customers.....they have to respond reasonably. Did you get the name of the individual with the cats? I'd be singling her out for a special mention in despatches. As there are proposed changes to equality legislation which include the prohibition of asking breastfeeding mothers to leave cafes etc....they need to move with the times. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chelsea Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 I would definitely write to or ring Marks and Spencer. I know they take customer service very seriously and would probably be outraged you were treated in this way. I havent had a baby so cant comment on the breast feeding thing but there is no excuse for anyone to talk to you like that - especially someone serving you! Maybe she was a Christmas "temp" covering the holidays? Sorry she made you felt like this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karen & co. Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 I'm so sorry she made you feel bad You go girl, I fed all 4 of mine same as the Martini advert; any time any place anywhere It doesn't have to be all out on show and if anyone was upset I would have moved, but her comments were dreadful When sat in a coffee shop in Stratford, some Japanese tourists did a double take and then proceeded to take photos of a friend and I feeding our boys There was nothing visible but obviously the thought of what we were doing was photo worthy Karen x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joojoo Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 That is absolutely disgraceful. Even if it isn't their policy to allow breastfeeding, to speak to you like that is appalling I would definitely complain and don't let it go until you've had a proper apology. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poachedegg Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 I bottle fed all 3 of mine - my choice, no one elses . My choice aside, I cannot see why anybody/company would object to what (to some people ) is the most natural thing in the world. ......am puzzled as to why the employee mentioned cats though - you should definitely follow this through with a complaint. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chelsea Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 That is absolutely disgraceful. Even if it isn't their policy to allow breastfeeding, to speak to you like that is appalling I would definitely complain and don't let it go until you've had a proper apology. totally agree. If you get no response (which I would say was highly unlikely) I would take it to Watchdog! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joojoo Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 Just found this quote The Booby Award for outstanding services for breastfeeding mums goes to Scandinavian furniture store Ikea, which was the clear winner after receiving plaudits from mums for its breastfeeding-friendly café designs. All in-store cafés provide a special area where mums can choose to feed, equipped with a comfy chair, privacy partition and play area; in addition breastfeeding is welcome throughout the store and nominating mums praised the warm welcome they received from staff when feeding. Other organisations highly commended include Starbucks, Bluewater shopping centre, Debenhams, Marks & Spencer, Pizza Express and John Lewis. This is the website http://www.missmolly.co.uk/parent-news/breastfeeding-mums-not-lovin-it-as-mcdonalds-gets-the-booby-p.html I would imagine they would be very interested to hear of your experience Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cinnamon Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 Complain about that awful woman & do it now,in writing!!! You could also contact a national newspaper with the story, as they would be all over it. I breast fed mine until they were a year old & loved every minute of it. I must admit to not always being comfortable with public feeding,but then again I have really big boobs (massive when feeding), & they often felt a bit unruly to have out in public I love to see women feeding their babies - it is always such a peaceful,nurturing,natural thing to see Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joojoo Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 Here's another story re M&S Marks & Spencer has launched an investigation into its customer service department following an incident where a woman complained to the company after being told to stop breastfeeding her child and walk up three floors to the nursing room in a Glasgow store. An e-mail from its customer service department said that "all customers who wish to breastfeed their babies have to use the nursing room provided". But after Smith contacted the company, a spokeswoman apologised and confirmed that all mothers could feed in public in the store if they wished. Sue Sadler, a spokeswoman for Marks & Spencer, said: "We can only apologise to the customer. It should not have happened and our policy remains that priority is given to nursing mothers. We are investigating how this e-mail was sent out to the woman in the first place." from here http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_qn4156/is_/ai_n12588135 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Angels4 Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 There is no reason why anybody should EVER speak to you in such a manner, especially somebody who is supposed to be in customer service. I would complain to the manager and threaten to have all my mom friends come to the shop and hold a "Breast Feeding" sit in. Perhaps the folks at M&S could use some sensitivity training. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bronze Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 I dont fit any of you poll I think yes anywhere but do it discretely. Its not difficult to feed without showing the world your boobs. I know I've done it plenty of times. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cinnamon Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 Its not difficult to feed without showing the world your boobs. I know I've done it plenty of times. Errrrrrrrrr - I was a J cup when I was feeding, & I would beg to differ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jomaxsmith Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 Definitely complain. What a horrible woman! I breastfed my boys whenever and wherever necessary and never received any comments (probably due to having small boobs that were easily covered by baby and baggy clothes!) In fact, when I answered the door to the Midwife, just after having ds1, she didn't even notice I was feeding him! Jo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bronze Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 top down to nipple baby covers bottom part. Muslin over shoulder if needed. Size shouldn't come into it then. at least then it keeps everyone happy though I'm sure most of the men you hear complaining 'its not natural' are the type who 'read' the sun anyway. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egluntyne Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 There doesn't have to be a great unbuttonning and lowering of hideous bra flaps as in our mothers day. It can be done discretely with a hoiking up of top etc. The baby's needs far outway the swooning of a middle aged virgin in my book. What would they have actually done, I wonder...get security to manhandle you out of the store? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cinnamon Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 Its not as easy for us bigger boobed girls Bronze For a start I had to press my boob away from the babes nose with a finger,or it would almost suffocate her. So that takes an extra hand................. Then I had to have these special bras that zipped open under my boob rather than popped down from the top,so it was an 'all out' situation I am all for it - just making a point that public feeding isn't always so simple when you have bigger boobs Wish it had been Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snowy Posted January 2, 2009 Share Posted January 2, 2009 I'm with you Cinnamon - as a very well endowed person, feeding mine was always a bit daunting due to the faffing about to get them in position and latched on. Once done then yes, the top would come down and it could be fairly discreet (but I remember also having to use a finger to stop the babe from suffocating! ) But it was still discreet enough - I couldn't see why anyone would complain, and if they did see anything then they were too close anyway and shouldn't have been looking! A friend of OH came to visit and turned up whilst I was feeding middle son. He dashed in and bent down to give me a hug and look at the baby, and only then did he realise what I was doing He was very But back on track, I would definitely complain!! How rude of her! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
