Poorly chicken

[MedusA]

One of my close friends died 3 years ago, and the last song was I Believe by Savage Garden

 

I love that song too! DD and I are real "Cabbage Garden" fans, much to the disgust of my OH. What a great song to have at your funeral!

 

 

have heard that at a funeral.... (I think it's called "Affirmation")

 

 

 

Phil

 

It is called Affirmation sometimes I can be so dozy

 

Karen x

 

Never mind. I knew exactly which one you meant Karen!

 

Talking of favourtite poems - one of mine is "Cargoes" by John Masefield (sp).

 

Quinquireme of Nineveh from distant Ophir,

Rowing home to haven in sunny Palestine,

With a cargo of ivory,

And apes and peacocks,

Sandalwood, cedarwood, and sweet white wine.

 

Stately Spanish galleon coming from the Isthmus,

Dipping through the Tropics by the palm-green shores,

With a cargo of diamonds,

Emeralds, amethysts,

Topazes, and cinnamon, and gold moidores.

 

Dirty British coaster with a salt-caked smoke-stack,

Butting through the Channel in the mad March days,

With a cargo of Tyne coal,

Road-rails, pig-lead,

Firewood, iron-ware, and cheap tin trays.

[Guest]

 

Talking of favourite poems - one of mine is "Cargoes" by John Masefield (sp).

 

Quinquireme of Nineveh from distant Ophir,

Rowing home to haven in sunny Palestine,

With a cargo of ivory,

And apes and peacocks,

Sandalwood, cedarwood, and sweet white wine.

 

Stately Spanish galleon coming from the Isthmus,

Dipping through the Tropics by the palm-green shores,

With a cargo of diamonds,

Emeralds, amethysts,

Topazes, and cinnamon, and gold moidores.

 

Dirty British coaster with a salt-caked smoke-stack,

Butting through the Channel in the mad March days,

With a cargo of Tyne coal,

Road-rails, pig-lead,

Firewood, iron-ware, and cheap tin trays.

 

 

fantastic!! one of only two poems I can remember that we had to learn at school..

 

that one - and Blake's "Tiger Tiger burning bright....."

 

TIGER, tiger, burning bright

In the forests of the night,

What immortal hand or eye

Could frame thy fearful symmetry?

 

Phil

[Olly]

Isn't 'quinquireme' just one of the best words ever!

[Tiggy]

my friends mom & surrogate mother to me died last year age 97, amy was a great lady & had big band music at her funeral it was great! the priest was dancing. I had known her for 25years but only at her funeral did I find out that she had lived in the same street in Nechalls as my grandparents

[Guest]

I want to be carried out (in my biodegradable coffin) to "Girls Just Want to have Fun' by Cyndi Lauper!

 

most coffins are biodegradable aren't they? We're seeing an increased number of willow coffins as in "woven willow"

 

they look lovely with flowers/greenery woven into them

 

but..... (don't be alarmed....) they do creak disturbingly when carried!

 

Phil

[Goosey Lucy]

We had a cardboard coffin for mum, there were two styles on offer, plain white or one that had a wood-effect stain on it. We chose this one as the other looked too much like flat-packed furniture

 

We had Autumn Leaves by Eva Cassidy and Forever Young by Joan Baez, both are beautiful songs.

 

I would like the Dies Ire from Mozarts Requiem! Preferably sung by a choir but on CD if not possible.

[sparkysmum]

Dear Revnev, Thankyou for caring and not simply "pressing the button" Everything you give you get back tenfold. Best wishes

[Cinnamon]

My SIL died 5 years ago, & we were very close as she was also my best pal.

Anyhow, a few weeks after her funeral I was visiting her grave & there was the most fantastic Afro Caribbean funeral going on just over the way.

 

All the ladies were in big bright feathery hats,the guys all had big flower buttonholes,a jazz band was playing,complete with trumpets, & there was singing,laughing & general merriment

 

A couple of the chaps came over to me & said that they hoped they weren't disturbing my mourning,& I told them it was the loveliest funeral I had ever seen

 

THATS the way to go!

[Olly]

Phil - yes, in theory all coffins ARE biodegradable unless they're zinc-lined!

What I should have said was 'ecological'

 

Some coffins are made from unsustainable wood sources. I have a friend who works in a woodland burial park, and they try to encourage use of willow, cardboard etc - it 'biodegrades' more quickly than wood, and I think they have to stipulate about things like brass handles, plaques etc. I'll ask her a bit more about their policy, I'm seeing her tonight.

 

They won't allow headstones, just wooden markers, in keeping with the natural surroundings. It's a beautiful, peaceful place and if I don't opt for cremation, it's where I'd like to end up.

[Paola]

My SIL died 5 years ago, & we were very close as she was also my best pal.

Anyhow, a few weeks after her funeral I was visiting her grave & there was the most fantastic Afro Caribbean funeral going on just over the way.

 

All the ladies were in big bright feathery hats,the guys all had big flower buttonholes,a jazz band was playing,complete with trumpets, & there was singing,laughing & general merriment

 

A couple of the chaps came over to me & said that they hoped they weren't disturbing my mourning,& I told them it was the loveliest funeral I had ever seen

 

THATS the way to go!

 

I agree Cinnamon Sorry to hear about you SIL

[One Man Banned]

Well done to you Phil for putting on a service for the old chap.

 

I've been to many funerals, and wish I'd said goodbye to my Grampy but I couldn't face it.

 

I've known for many years what I'd like to happen to me when I go. I don't wish to be buried as I don't know where would be appropriate, Wales or Gloucester. So I plan to be cremated, and to match my fun and lively personality I wish for "Burn Baby Burn - Disco Inferno" to be played as the curtains come round. Topped off with disco lights too and possibly a smoke machine.

 

It's an odd choice and even called sick by some I know - it's just how I'd like to be remembered, I love to disco and want my passing to be joyful.

 

A

xx

[Phonix]

I attended a friends funeral in April who died in car accident with her cousin and 2 aunts. They died instantly at the scene but she was in hospital for a few days before they turned off the machines. She was teh most amazing person but the funeral just didn't do her justice. It was a joint funeral and she hardly seemed to be mentioned and her daughter seemed to be mentioned as an afterthought.

We wanted to not wear black and such but her parents asked that we just go in black so the funeral just wasn't the person we knew at all. We went to the park where we spent alot of time and released 21 balloons in as many different colours as possible (she was 21 when she died) and had a toast of Jack Daniels as a few weeks earlier she'd said that she wanted everyone to drink JD at her funeral.

It was one of the saddest moments of my life but at least we remembered her in the fun-loving way that she was rather than in the black and sombre mood of the funeral. I know that it was a joint funeral so it would have been disrespectful to the others to do anything but what was asked and expected but as it was not focused on Claire it was nice to get together and remember her how she was in our eyes.

 

x

[cathybc]

what a sad topic. My dad died in January, he was not religious at all and hadn't discussed his funeral so we were at a bit of a loss re what to do. In the end, we played some of his favourite classical music, and my brother-in-law read a euology that the four of us kids and my mum had written. It was very short and simple, but right for my dad and indeed the rest of us, none of us are religious and, as a family, not given to expression of feelings.

 

I agree that the funeral should be the choice of the deceased and mourners - whatever is right form them.

 

But back to the start of the topic - well done Phil for conducting the funeral for this lonely old man. Again, I agree that it may have been the man's choice to live like that, but it is very sad that he shut himself away when he lost his wife, I would be so upset if my mum felt like that. Literally watching my dad die (cancer) really made me realise how precious life is and when I am feeling down, I remember what a gift it is to be cherished and lived to the full.

[baby bears mum]

My OH wants to have a viking burial - not sure the Coast Guard will be too happy though

 

I don't really care what happens at mine so long as it's not too dismal and ecologically sound - I have every intention of hanging around a while spying !!!!

 

I did a Will for someone once who wanted a Wham song at their funeral (we thought that was fine so long as it wasn't "Wake me up before you go go").

 

 

 

Its strange isn't it that even though the poor chap lived and died alone he has touched the hearts of people he didn't even know. I guess we all touch people in one way or another whether we know it or not.

 

I think we should all give our nearest and dearest an extra long hug today.

 

One for all of you too.

 

Love