The Dogmother Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 Mermaid or Whale? Recently, in a large French city, a poster featuring a young, thin and tan woman appeared in the window of a gym. It said: THIS SUMMER DO YOU WANT TO BE A MERMAID OR A WHALE? A middle aged woman, whose physical characteristics did not match those of the woman on the poster, responded publicly to the question posed by the gym. To Whom It May Concern: Whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, sea lions, curious humans). They have an active sex life, they get pregnant and have adorable baby whales. T hey have a wonderful time with dolphins stuffing themselves with shrimp. They play and swim in the seas, seeing wonderful places like Patagonia, the Bering Sea and the coral reefs of Polynesia. Whales are wonderful singers and have even recorded CDs. T hey are incredible creatures and virtually have no predators other than humans. They are loved, protected and admired by almost everyone in the world. Mermaids don't exist. If they did exist, they would be lining up outside the offices of Argentinean psychoanalysts due to identity crisis. Fish or human? They don't have a sex life because they kill men who get close to them not to mention how could they have sex? Therefore they don't have kids either. Not to mention who wants to get close to a girl who's skin is all scaly and smells like a fish store? The choice is perfectly clear to me... I want to be a whale. P.S. We are in an age when media puts into our heads the idea that only skinny people are beautiful, but I prefer to enjoy an ice cream with my grandkids, a good dinner with a man who makes me shiver and a latte with my friends. With time, we gain weight because we accumulate so much information and wisdom in our heads that when there is no more room, it distributes out to the rest of our bodies. So we aren't heavy, we are enormously cultured, educated and happy. Beginning today, when I look at my butt in the mirror I will think, "Good gosh, look how smart I am"! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Couperwife Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 I love it definitely something to think about Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kitbag Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 I think that's brill! It made me think, and I know which I would rather be!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ness3103 Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 brilliant so i'm not fat really, just extremely wise Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scramble Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 I love Beluga Whales Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chick wiggle Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 That is brilliant, my bum must be super intelligent Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chickvic Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 Fantastic! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mutrix Farmers Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 I'm a whale and proud of it! Now I understand the cause of middle aged spread! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WarrensWorld Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 I've found a Porpoise in life, I want to be a Dolphin........ I show myself out.............. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scramble Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 I think that's funny! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Happy-Mama Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 that's great Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Happy chickens! Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 Brilliant - always knew I must be really clever!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tiggy Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 brilliant Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Redwing Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 I'm a genius me! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Olly Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 thanks Claret, that has cheered me up on a particularly 'fat' day! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Valkyrie Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 That's terrific. I love the Beluga whales too. It's their little smiley faces. My bum is so huge that I must be brilliant - unfortunately I have forgotten most of the knowledge that I have accumulated. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bluekarin Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 Thats fantastic I too must have a very intelligent bum. I won't even mention the other areas Warrensworld - very funny Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lewis Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 Lewis likes this, I'll stick with being a whale Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
