Ammonia smell in coop-first time owner

[The Dogmother]

I was reading this excellent article by Jackie Kemp (a chicken keeper ). How many of your children do chores around the house?

 

A friend of Rosie's (so 12 years old) was round the other day and has no idea how to boil a hob kettle, nor how to make a cup of tea... 'mum won't let me in the kitchen; I make too much mess'. I hadn't realised this as she joins in happily when R has baking sessions with friends and turns my kitchen into a tip, and I must say that I am slightly aghast.

 

Like most pre-teens, Rosie can always find something else to do than the chores she's supposed to be doing, but is perfectly capable of cooking a meal, doing the laundry and ironing or mowing the lawn. How do these 'unable' children survive and what else do they do to fill their time?

[Cinnamon]

Its a mystery to me

 

Mine have always pulled their weight,although now its usually because they need extra cash for something,or a lift somewhere.

 

I with hold pocket money for the youngest (15) until she has stripped her sheets & remade her bed, emptied the household bins & generally tidied her room.

Did the same for the eldest & as she now no longer gets pocket money I find she is happy enough to lend a hand still anyhow. While she needs lifts to the boyfs house,I still have the deck stacked in my favour

 

They can cook,the youngest is far more confident in the kitchen than the oldest,but as a veggie she often needs to be self sufficient anyhow. I will be sending the eldest off to Uni next year armed with recipes &a bit more practical experience.

 

Laundry I don't ask them to do,but I do expect any dirties to be put into one of the 2 baskets I have in my room (1 for whites,1 for colours). I just think that with 4 of us its more efficient for me to do larger loads than for a girl to wash one outfit.

 

If they come home & find the dishwasher full,or the laundry still out,I can trust them to do what needs doing,mostly. More than I can the husband,if truth be told!

[Deb Dav]

My two sons have to do chores to earn their allowance.

 

Every weekend my youngest, 12, cooks himself a full english which consists of; sausages, bacon, fried bread, beans and scrambled eggs. He uses the grill, gas hob and the microwave to achieve this. Bless he will then wash up and dry up to clear his mess.

 

My eldest son, 15, puts washing on, hangs it out and then folds it up when dry, cook meals, hoovers, dusts, literally anything I ask him and I only have to ask him once.

 

People these days are too worried about the 'M' word (mess) - and will not let youngsters try for themselves - these are all life skills that they will need for when they leave home.... maybe they don't leave, just stay until they are mid forties etc

[bronze]

My lot don't have set chores as yet but I expect them to help as and when I ask.

The younger ones tend to help unload the dishwasher and the older two clear the table, and a whole lot of can you go and get 'item' for me. They're all expected ti help tidy up

Eldest will sort out the others breakfasts if need be

[The Dogmother]

I'm a firm believer in 'mess' Deb, if it is part of the learning process. We are currently going through this with Rosie's room - the untidiness there has become unacceptable; I will not strip nor make her bed, tidy her room, clean her room nor go in there to collect dirty clothes - she is perfectly capable of doing these things for herself. She will reach a crisis point at some stage and do something about it, but at the moment, any nagging from me goes unheeded and I refuse to work myself into a stew about it. She will run out of clean clothes soon enough

[Mrs Webmuppet]

Little Miss Webmuppet (aged 10) will do most chores when asked ( except tidy her bedroom- we have differing views on tidyness ). She gets her own breakfast, she is more than capable of doing microwave porridge ( although a grown up has to get the bowl out of the microwave as it is too hot for her to lift out safely).

 

She is can follow a recipe and often helps out in the kitchen ( she has been known to make raspberry jam under supervision).She will even go the local shop with a list ( she has a mobile phone for safety purposes).

 

She also has to organise her sailing kit most weeks. We usually check it over afterwards just in case she forgets some vital bit of kit.

 

By the age of 13 I was capable of running a home ( Mother was run over, injuring her arm badly and I had to learn the hard way) and hopefully I will have LMW on the way to a similar skill set.

[Egluntyne]

Mine were expected to keep bedrooms reasonable, bring down dirty laundry, empty the dishwasher, and were all taught to iron and cook.

 

Pocket money and lifts were withheld, and television and computer time were withdrawn if they didn't come up to scratch, and that included cleaning out and feeding pets.

 

Extra money was earned by doing extra chores. I could always find something.

 

If you don't equip them for life away from home, you have done them no favours at all. That includes them being able to use public transport confidently, and not to be be ferried everywhere.

[ClaireG]

I agree,how else do children learn if they don't do chores? From a very young age Adam had to tidy away his own toys and help pair up socks etc. Pairing socks was a game and was also useful in teaching him his colours.

Now at 11, he can make a very decent cup of tea, cooks with minimal supervision and washes up after himself. He has to tidy his own room as i refuse to do it. Put his washing either in the machine or the dirty laundry basket and sort it whens it's washed. He also helps clean out the chickens and helps with things like mowing the lawn etc. He will hoover and dust when asked.

When my Dad married my Mum he was 21 and didn't know how to do anything. His Mum used to still lay his clothes out for him My Mum soon put a stop to that

[Valkyrie]

Love the title of this thread, Claret.

 

[lillybettybabs]

Well... My oldest stepson will do chores and can cook etc but his yougest brother is 9 and very mothered by his mum,

He didn't know how to clean his shoes up until a week ago she does everything for him!!

[ali-s]

I am glad this subject has come up as I was pondering over chores this weekend.

 

DD does very little about the house. Five days a week she has swim training after school. she gets home from school at 4pm and is back out the house and to the pool at 4.30pm, she gets home at 7.30pm, has something to eat and most evenings she has homework to do. She usually spends time after all this on MSN chatting to her friends for a while and then off to bed. Sunday is off to the pool at 6.30am and gets home at 10am. Something to eat and sometimes back to bed for a while. Sunday afternoons she might go out with friends shopping or to the Cinema.Sundays ( if she is not swimming Sunday afternoon is the only time she meets up with friends although she has friends in her swimming club).

This weekend she was away at a swimming competition from Friday afternoon until Sunday night. The last 4 weekends she has been away at swimming competions.

 

Yesterday I spent a long time cleaning up after her, her bedroom was a tip , clothes everywhere, clean and dirty. School books strewn about, dirty glasses and plates on windowsills. I do leave clean bedding in her room and she is expected to change her bedding. The clean bedding I left for her on Wednesday was still where I put it.

 

I think at 15 years old she should be able to clean up after herself and help about the house. I should be teaching her to cook meals and be preparing her for the time when she has a place and a family of her own. I am at a loss how to do this with her having such a busy schedule. We don't (especially me) push her into swimming. I would be so happy if she gave it up

 

Any advice gratefully received.

[The Dogmother]

My withdrawing pocket money or lifts etc doesn't work as the ex interferes and coughs up money or gives her a lift. He does it to spite me, but it's really her who he isn't helping

[paddy1709]

My five and a half year old can now do his own baked beans with cheese. He can open the can, put it in a dish and microwave it (two pushes), then grate his own cheese. He is now on the same level as his father who can cook nothing. I will never tidy my daughters room except if she helps me.

I am just about to start a pocket money regime to get more chores done as i don't want them to end up like their father who was completely closetted by his mother (we are still together!).

[majorbloodnock]

My two are nearly 9 (son) and nearly 4 (daughter). Neither have set jobs to do regularly. Both are expected to help with the regular household tasks. For my daughter, it's limited to helping me cook, loading up the washing machine, tidying up toys wherever they may be, watering in the allotment, putting clean clothes away and other similarly uncomplicated tasks. My son is more capable, so more is expected; cooking dinner once in a while, washing up, hoovering, baking bread every now and then and so on. He also recently got the chance to help with redecorating the dining room, so was let loose with sandpaper and, later, a paint brush. This went well on the whole.

 

It's also true that my wife and I don't split family chores into "his" and "hers"; if something needs doing then one of us will do it, but weight is given to whoever has ability in a given area. I'm more proficient with a saucepan and savoury stuff, whilst my wife is better at baking. If my wife has to spend a session with an iron, I'm the more logical choice for cleaning the loo. I'm the better woodworker, my wife is the better gardener. All we're doing with the division of labour is including the kids in the list of people who need to muck in according to capabilities, so they're not getting chores so much as being useful members of a cohesive family.

[Goosey Lucy]

Yes, both my boys (10 and 6) do chores to earn pocket money.

 

We have a simple laminated chart on the fridge, they tick when the chore is done. Some are daily (eg drying up and putting away dishes as we don't have a dishwasher besides me) others are weekly (shoe cleaning, emptying wastepaper baskets).

 

They have the chance to earn extra money at my discretion - stripping beds, helping to give cubes a thorough clean.

 

At the moment it works well for us.

 

I have also started to get them to help prepare meals, this includes deciding what they are going to cook for the family, finding ingredients, shopping as necessary then the actual food preparation and cooking. There is no financial reward for this but they are loving it! I am determined they will know their way round a kitchen before they are let loose on the big wide world

 

I am constantly amazed by the number of people who are surprised that they help me in this way, I think I could earn a fortune taking in other people kids the amount of times someone has said 'I wish you could get my son/daughter to help me.'

 

My five and a half year old can now do his own baked beans with cheese. He can open the can, put it in a dish and microwave it (two pushes), then grate his own cheese. He is now on the same level as his father who can cook nothing.

This really made me chortle

[lillybettybabs]

i think it's life learning skills,

I do tackle the youngest stepson on occasions as i don't think his mother is doing him any favors by doing everything for him (she says it's easier) and not getting him to do chores.

 

No one wants a boy/girlfriend who can't look after themself!

[Sageandonion]

My children are 12, 10 and 7. They all help around the house to some extent or other - general tidying, dusting, hoovering, loading/unloading the washing machine, clearing the table and washing/drying up. We are down to 2 pets at the moment, a dog and a hamster. They all feed the dog from time to time, ES walks her and YS feeds and cleans out his hamster. They will help with the chickens/rabbits when we get them. I have to say they don't do chores naturally as it were, I have to nag them! They'd all disappear pretty sharpish after tea if they could for example! Apart from fairy cake baking their culinary skills leave a lot to be desired, not their fault but mine - it's just quicker and there's less mess if I do it. Though reading this thread I guess it's about time I gave them more opportunities in the kitchen!

[Chucky Mama]

Mine are 12, 14 & 16. All 3 do their own laundry although I do peg it out most of the time. 1 feeds the dog, 1 puts the chooks away and the other does the bins and replaces loo rolls. ES has just taken it upon himself to do the packed lunches for me . In the holidays they take it in turns to cook. They have to keep their rooms tidy otherwise I go in and pile everything on their beds. Every Sunday evening the house is split up and everyone has to take a room to tidy.

[chuckmum6]

My son's can choose to earn more pocket money by doing job's my eldest (11yrs) is very keen to do so and empties the dishwasher every day, he also cleans the cars. He is particularly independent and very eager learn how to cook, he can whip up cakes without any help or a recipe. My youngest (9) hates doing anything so only gets a minimal pocket money each week. He has to clear the table/set the table etc, as normal jobs we all do, but he does moans although we take no notice! He is keen to cook but know that clearing up is also part of it. He is having to do more for himself and can do his own breakfast make a cup of hot choc etc. How else are they going to survive in the world? I certainly don't plan on raising helpless boys.

[CatieB]

My son is 6 and it his his job every morning to get in the eggs and take the dog out. This involves walking the dog about 100 yrds down the road (we are the only house here at a dead end in a very rural location) and I keep an eye on him out the window and make sure I can hear him. Whilst I think some would think I'm mad to allow this I think its good to teach him responsibilty and independence.

 

He also checks the dogs food and water, although bless him he does then forget to tell me they are empty unless I ask.

 

He also has the more obvious tidying up jobs at home, eg his toys etc.

[hazard]

my 2 are dd 16 started college and ds 14 they have to get there breakfast in the morning and clear up after themselves and clear away the dishes in the evening after dinner and help to put the chook away on weekendends they have to let the chooks out help clean out all 3 houses take the dogs for a run in the field (2 westies) get all the dirty washing ready to be washed dd cooks the evening meal on saturday nites i want my kids to be able to support themselves when they flea the nest.

[The Dogmother]

Goosey's sentence about teaching other people's children to do chores/cooking is interesting; two friends of mine own a local cafe, serving wholesome home-cooked food (lillybettybabs may know this as it's not far from her... in Middleton Cheney), both of them are qualified cooks and were asked by a customer if they'd teach her son (during the summer hols) enough basic dishes to enable him to cook when he goes to uni. Not sure what's wrong with her doing this herself, but I bet that'd take off as a business if you did it Lucy

[Redwing]

I didnt have to do many chores as a child, I was useless as a young adult

 

My husband says he had to bring me up

[The Dogmother]

you're a dab hand at mucking out now Tasha

 

Phil's is a hopeless cook, odd as his mother is excellent. He is very good at cleaning, tidying and mending things, so we have an agreement when he stays... I cook, he tidies up and puts away. Suits me Sir!

[paddy1709]

My children have recently come to the age where they are asking me why Mummy and Daddy are not married. I have found a very simple answer in that he has not passed his husband exams. He cannot cook (he was a bachelor until 40 and ate out most of the time), he cannot load the dishwasher (he gets upset at how I load it) and cannot work the washing machine or tumble dryer. They have accepted this reason without question.

However I cannot let them go down this route as well - he is a lost cause!