EmmaJC Posted May 16, 2011 Share Posted May 16, 2011 I've had a letter today advising me that the health visitor is going to be coming to my house in a fortnight to visit me, however I'm not due to give birth until a month after that visit and had always been under the impression they only got involved after the midwife signed me off. Is this usual? Whilst I see the point of having a health visitor in the early days after the birth when you're not keen on going to the doctors surgery I can't see why they want to come over before. Can I say no to a visit? Thanks in advance!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patsylabrador Posted May 16, 2011 Share Posted May 16, 2011 My health visitor came to visit before my babies. She was a lovely lady with a wealth of useful information and we became quite good friends over the years. I had lots of worries & things I didn't know before my first and she was helpful & reassuring. This was 20 + years ok. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katieadams Posted May 16, 2011 Share Posted May 16, 2011 Yeah mine came to visit before the birth too, but I can't say she was ever of any help - just someone to humour for 5 mins and then she went away, never to be seen again! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lorax Posted May 16, 2011 Share Posted May 16, 2011 You don't have to agree to a visit. If you don't want her to come just say you're fine for the moment. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soapdragon Posted May 16, 2011 Share Posted May 16, 2011 Absolutley you can say no - in fact you can say no to anything offered along these lines! Whilst I don't have anything at all against Health Visitors I had some spectacularly unhelpful and, quite frankly, useless ones (tho I know there are brilliant ones out there - just my bad luck! ) Both my boys were prem (5 weeks and 11 weeks) and the Health Visitors only corrected their age up to age one year. Not a problem with the 35 weeker but hopeless with the 29 weeker as the Consultant had told us to correct his age up to around 3 and a half and I think HE knew better than the Health Visitors so I declined any further contact with them after the first few weeks. We had no problems and got along just fine without! My GP is brilliant and I knew she was there, if needed Equally we were supposed to have a Health Visitor attached to the Special Care unit visit us for a while once they let us out but she was very rude and overbearing (none of the staff on the ward got on with her either so it wasn't just us!) we said no to that too! Just go with what feels comfortable and right for you! I am sure that your Health Visitor will be lovely tho. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jules. Posted May 16, 2011 Share Posted May 16, 2011 I had my last baby over 7 years ago & was a member of AIMS . At that time AIMS were reporting that health visitors were going to start visiting before a birth, & the purpose of the visit was to get to know you, but also to spot any potential problems ie depression, chaotic family life etc Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Looney Posted May 16, 2011 Share Posted May 16, 2011 I never had a visit from the health visitor before either of my two children were born. My daughter was born 4 months ago and the health visitor didn't come around til a week or so after she arrived. In fact, two came at the same time! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beach chick Posted May 16, 2011 Share Posted May 16, 2011 I'd go with it if I were you - if she's any good, you've made a useful contact, and if she's useless at least you know what to expect after the birth - and therefore dont need to stress out about her first visit when you have your baby at home with you! my HV with my first was FABULOUS; the one with my second was useless (an opinion shared with about 100% of local mums it's fair to say). but when you get a good one, they are really worth their weight in gold, and can help you in all sorts of ways - general advice, post-natal groups, etc etc etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted May 16, 2011 Share Posted May 16, 2011 I can vaguely remember my health visitor being rubbish - I avoided her like the plague after the first couple of visits. Patronising moo was always referring to the fact that she thought I was rather old to be having my first child Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seagazer Posted May 17, 2011 Share Posted May 17, 2011 My last one was rubbish and really annoyed me actually. She kept going on about how tired I looked. Yes, I've just had a baby who is not sleeping through the night yet because he's only 2 weeks old and I've got 2 other children. Wonder why I'm tired? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beach chick Posted May 17, 2011 Share Posted May 17, 2011 claret and cinnamon - you could both describe the one I had with my 2nd. but I still remember the lovely Wendy who was so fantastic after my 1st. good ones are brilliant! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EmmaJC Posted May 17, 2011 Author Share Posted May 17, 2011 Thank you all! Maybe it's the nesting instinct, but I can't help but take offense that someone from the government has invited themselves around to my house without asking me first Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted May 17, 2011 Share Posted May 17, 2011 It's a long time since I had mine, but I understand that these days they are under pressure to meet targets and fulfil programmes of care, perhaps that's the case here? If you don't want her to call, then just give her a ring and let her know, you can always meet up at the baby clinic at your surgery when it's more convenient. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EmmaJC Posted May 17, 2011 Author Share Posted May 17, 2011 I've been in touch with her to ask if she could visit after the birth, as right now I'm entirely too frazzled and massive to possibly deal with visitors who don't bring chocolate Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soapdragon Posted May 17, 2011 Share Posted May 17, 2011 Good for you Emma , as already mentioned; go with what feels right (especially chocolate!) Big hugs and let us know how you go! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
