scarlettohara Posted July 5, 2011 Share Posted July 5, 2011 (edited) apart from not talking a loaded gun into the room Edited July 6, 2011 by Guest Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Couperwife Posted July 5, 2011 Share Posted July 5, 2011 hmmm, maybe a loaded gun isnt the best idea go in remembering that you have got us lot behind you (((hugs))) cathy x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beach chick Posted July 5, 2011 Share Posted July 5, 2011 I suppose be clear what you want from it and what will make you feel better? good luck xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alis girls Posted July 5, 2011 Share Posted July 5, 2011 Good luck Sara - thinking of you - just remember the sisterhood is behind you - Ali x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bluekarin Posted July 5, 2011 Share Posted July 5, 2011 Um, no idea what goes in those things. I'd try to stay as calm as possible, be as clear as possible, get across what I'd like to get out of it. Oh, and not get too emotional. But me being me, I'd do the complete opposite of all of it Seriously though, good luck and don't forget you have Omleteer power behind you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Space Chick Posted July 5, 2011 Share Posted July 5, 2011 If you feel it getting on top of you, take a deep breath and compose yourself before speaking. Rely on your legal advice, and stay calm Lots of hugs xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goosey Lucy Posted July 5, 2011 Share Posted July 5, 2011 I'd suggest making a list of points you want to get across. And try not to react negatively if you feel you are being accused of anything. Take a breath before answering like in an interview to give yourself a moments thinking time. Hope all goes well for you x Is it just me that misreads mediation as meditation? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bluekarin Posted July 5, 2011 Share Posted July 5, 2011 Is it just me that misreads mediation as meditation? nope Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sam Posted July 5, 2011 Share Posted July 5, 2011 Is it just me that misreads mediation as meditation? nope Me too, then saw you wanted to take a loaded gun into the room!! Good luck Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Redwing Posted July 5, 2011 Share Posted July 5, 2011 Stay calm and dont get upset Think before replying as Debs says as every word and body movement may be examined for weakness Good luck x x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scarlettohara Posted July 5, 2011 Author Share Posted July 5, 2011 Thanks, will take all advice on board. I have had a prior meeting with just the mediator so she has a note of my expectations, my solicitor told me I don't have to actually say anything - just listen and report back. Feel very nervous though which is silly as I spent 20 years of my adult life with this person Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plum Posted July 6, 2011 Share Posted July 6, 2011 Deep breath, good luck you dealt with other situations well. Keep strong x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alis girls Posted July 6, 2011 Share Posted July 6, 2011 The force is with you (ie Omletforce) Thinking of you Ali x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chook n Boo Mum Posted July 6, 2011 Share Posted July 6, 2011 Big hugs Sara...........make like a swan, serene & calm above........even if you're paddling like mad below the surface Sha x p.s.Guilty of meditation too Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chickendoodle Posted July 6, 2011 Share Posted July 6, 2011 Remember that although the whole thing is alien to you the people doing the mediating have seen it all before. Good luck Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ClaireG Posted July 6, 2011 Share Posted July 6, 2011 Good luck x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scarlettohara Posted July 6, 2011 Author Share Posted July 6, 2011 Well he was rude, lost his temper, ranted and raved and made me look like Mother Theresa He refused to budge over finances so looks like it will go to court even though the mediator explained that the court would look at his income compared to mine and may possibly ask him to pay spousal maintenance Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beach chick Posted July 6, 2011 Share Posted July 6, 2011 well I bet you're glad it's over and you survived! dont know the ins and outs but he sounds as if he is being very silly... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
freddie Posted July 6, 2011 Share Posted July 6, 2011 Well done you, and sorry you're having to go through it all. Keep calm, and let him screw himself up, without any help from anyone except himself! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alis girls Posted July 6, 2011 Share Posted July 6, 2011 And you lived with him for how long .... Mother Theresa, Princess Di and the pope all in one I think. I think you deserve an MBE OBE or any other award. well done for being so calm ............ and breathe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bluekarin Posted July 6, 2011 Share Posted July 6, 2011 Go you! Keep it up and the courts will see what an eejit he is and all will go in your favour I am sure (((hugs))) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scarlettohara Posted July 6, 2011 Author Share Posted July 6, 2011 Having just received my solicitor's bill includng next months retainer in anticipation of court costs, I am unable to continue I can't magic money out of nowhere and my solicitor doesn't do public funding. At last I made him see today what a pig he is and maybe it will be good to move on and not have this hanging over my head once the absolute is pronounced However it is always the people with money that win in the end and this is very unfair Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alis girls Posted July 6, 2011 Share Posted July 6, 2011 Lotsa hugs Sara - dont know what to say. Ali x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scarlettohara Posted July 6, 2011 Author Share Posted July 6, 2011 (edited) Thanks Ali, feel OK - you sort of get resigned to the knocks in the end Edited July 6, 2011 by Guest Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plum Posted July 6, 2011 Share Posted July 6, 2011 Well done for being so brave at the session. Perhaps there's another way Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
