debbier Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 I love christmas: the food, the parties, seeing family and friends. However, I just wish some of my family would jointly give up on the big present malarky! I'd happily swap home made or token presents, and am all for buying the kids ones, but sometimes I despair of the uselessness of just swapping an equivalent value gift with someone. I even end up buying and wrapping my own present from my mil, which is practical in terms of where she lives etc. but is pretty daft really! http://women.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/women/the_way_we_live/article6911334.ece Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
C&T Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 I tried suggesting we reduce the amount spent on a presents last year - I was met with "Why on earth would you want to do that" stares... This year, I am making hampers for most people, but there are still a couple who I know would not appreciate anything I made as it didn't come from an expensive shop - so therefore abviously can't taste any good at all! And while part of me wants to give them a hamper regardless, the other part of me would like the food I have made to go where it is appreciated! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 We came to a family agreement some time ago.. we only buy presents for the children. My folks have all they need, but love the little hampers of homemade goodies. The children get things they really want rather than fipperies. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cinnamon Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 I went down the hamper route too - this will be my fourth year of making them & while I know my familt appreciate them, I am not so sure about the out laws I tend to bumpf them up with nice little cheap personal gifts - pretty knickers,soaps,gadgety things just so they seem to have been put together with love rather than for covenience. Another upside is that the joint hamper I do for MIL & FIL can be keyed more towards her likes, as I don't get on with him at all Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tiggy Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 OH & I have even agreed that the kids get far more than they need, some of the presents are still siting in their rooms unused from last year so we are going to concentrate on getting them 1 present that they really want & stick to it. I have done cuttings of rosemary bay & mint from my garden & potted them up in Sept as little gifts for friends on christmas day when we go to SIL for dinner Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Griffin Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 OH & I have even agreed that the kids get far more than they need, some of the presents are still siting in their rooms unused from last year so we are going to concentrate on getting them 1 present that they really want & stick to it. I have done cuttings of rosemary bay & mint from my garden & potted them up in Sept as little gifts for friends on christmas day when we go to SIL for dinner Last year my kids got more pleasure from all the little bits and bobs I bought them from Hawkins Bazaar than they did anything else! Cheap and cheerful so we'll be doing that again. A mood ring kept Emily amused for days Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paddy Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 We don't do presents for adults just children. I get my little ones one large one and then focus on the stocking which they absolutely adore. I buy through the year little things to put in them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ain't Nobody Here Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 We only buy presents for the kids too. OH and I don't even bother for each other, really . I do buy smallish, carefully chosen presents for my MIL and FIL though because I like them and they are so good to us and the kids . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Redwing Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 We usually give money (at their request) to the children and buy my mum and hubbys dad a small gift each We dont get each other presents Hubby is working christmas day (7am-3:15pm) again this year (he volunteers so that people with kids can have the day off bless him ) so we will have from 4pm as quality time together which we will appreciate more than any present A fiend of mine does a secret santa with her family, they only have one present to buy that way and there is a limit of £10 which I think is a great idea the chickens and sheep obviously will get gifts of treats Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Olly Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 We had a family weekend away in October, and we decided to do a 'Secret Santa' - we all drew names, and will only buy a present for that person. Since my family (siblings, nieces and nephews) numbers about 18 people, this is a huge relief to some of us especially those with not much money. It is a big change for us - I like buying presents and in fact I'd already bought some - but it makes much more sense all round. I will still buy for my sisters, and two of my nieces to whom I am particularly close, but it saves me having to buy presents for nephews whom I don't see very often and about whose tastes I know very little, or for my brother who is well-off and doesn't need anything. I decided some years ago to avoid buying 'toot' - unless I know someone wants a particular thing or I'm sure they will use it, I've gone for consumables like bath stuff, food and drink or plants. I only wish others would do the same, my last trip the charity shop included several things I've been given as well-meant but totally useless gifts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
craftyhunnypie Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 We've got a budget of £15 per person this year - it's much better & easier. I shall also be knitting some gifts & making small hampers. gagetshop online have some nice funky gifts. I really want a sunbeam jar. Emma.x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
docsquid Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 I'm afraid I only give actual gifts to my DH and small treats for the cats (and this year the chickens too!). My DH is totally oblivious to the world of fashion and clothes, and whilst it is nice that he wears things until they actually wear out, he tends to wear them beyond that point! Christmas is my opportunity to smarten him up a bit and make him throw out the t-shirts and trousers with holes in! Honestly, his cast-offs are not good enough for a charity bag but they go to the local charity shop as they can get money for rags. All my friends and in-laws get a World Vision gift, which means the money I would waste on things they don't really want now goes to somebody who desperately needs it. To start with I think they thought I was being mean, but then they could see the value of what was being done and they are comfortable with it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ubereglu Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 I like the giving and receiving bits, but I do sometimes wish that people put more thoughts into the gifts they give though and spent as much time and effort as I end up taking. It doesn't have to cost a lot. What I really hated receiving were cat/dog related things, as I really am not a cutesy person and generally dislike all 'cute' animal pictures. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egluntyne Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 It is supposed to be the thought that counts! We only give actual gifts to the 'children'. The adults club together and buy 'virtual' gifts for each other , such as an aromatherapy session for a patient, or an hours nursing care at the local hospice. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Happy chickens! Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 I feel a real humbug as I agree with everything in that article!! It's not just Christmas either - in October OH has a birthday, typical bloke doesn't want anything much, so my sister sends him a chq, then the reverse happens when her fella has his birthday and doesn't know either!! I hate trying to think of the perfect present - it gets harder and harder each year, and I wish I had the nerve to 'give' the whole family goats and chickens through Oxfam or similar as that would have so much more meaning than a load of 3 for 2 stuff from Boots! I loved Christmas when the kids were little - there was real joy and suprise there, but as teenagers, although they do appreciate the presents, it's not the same. This year we are going away, just the 4 of us, and are going to have a secret santa between us which I think will be a lot more fun! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 I once had a wonderful present from The Boy - he'd booked me in for a facial at a s"Ooops, word censored!"y local spa, arranged with work (unbeknownst to me) for me to have the day off. We had alovely, relaxing day after my facial, when he took me for lunch at Daylesford Organics Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seagazer Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 We tend to only buy for the kids in the extended family apart from OH's sister who doesn't have any kids. I'm going to buy her cats a present this year. The mums get presents too. It does get harder and harder each year trying to think of what to get everyone. I haven't even started yet, we set a limit on it last year but it did mean that it made it harder to find presents for the kids. My DD is 22 now and is worried that "Ooops, word censored!"ody will buy her anything as she's the oldest 'child' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cinnamon Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 There's a lot to be said for the thought counting too. The out laws tend to just chuck cash at everyone, which feels impersonal & wrong to me......... Something with some thought, meaning & love is all that's needed (so long as it isn't socks) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A chickychickychick-ENN!! Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 I've hinted this year I'm scaling down and have had people pointedly say they'll be buying for the children (point being so should I - buy for their children). I look at the amount of tat their kids have and think back to how much we had and today's kids seem so spoilt and drowning is stuff they get given all year round and that I'm loathe to buy. I'll probably succumb in part but even my pared down list comes to about 40 people for nearly immediate family (got in-laws now and boy do they 'accidentally' breed). We have a fiver rule for everyone with £20 for parents, or something homemade. Still adds up to hundreds I don't have this year. OH and I are making gifts for each other. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
C&T Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 There's a lot to be said for the thought counting too.The out laws tend to just chuck cash at everyone, which feels impersonal & wrong to me......... Something with some thought, meaning & love is all that's needed (so long as it isn't socks) I've always though Cash is fine for a birthday, but not for Christmas. I know that sometimes (and especially for difficult teenagers!) it feels like the best option, but it is impersonal... But then you also don't want to end up buying something that will never see the light of day! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Olly Posted November 12, 2009 Share Posted November 12, 2009 I'm giving cash to the two youngest family members (2 and 11 months, respectively) - their birthdays are both near Christmas, and both sets of parents have a Trust Fund set up for them. They get so many presents at that age and neither of them needs more toys, so I'd rather give some money that will be saved towards a future date. This is an exception to my usual rule though, I don't like giving cash, and when they're old enough to know what Christmas is, I will probably give 'real' presents. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ubereglu Posted November 13, 2009 Share Posted November 13, 2009 I have to say most of the presents I receive from my family aren't normally cash, mostly because we don't have many alive relatives anymore. In general we write lists to each other and send them via e-mail to everyone, which is quite handy, especially as they often don't have a lot of time to shop! Usually it's only a few things and they tend to be things we actually need or would like, eg books or a specific amount of knitting wool, because these are things we will USE! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
docsquid Posted November 13, 2009 Share Posted November 13, 2009 I actually wish people wouldn't ask me what I want for Christmas as I never know! I usually end up asking for something that I don't really want because I can't think of anything else. If somebody is giving me a gift I prefer something small, inexpensive and hand-made and over which some care has been taken. I like it to be a surprise, not something I've asked for. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christian Posted November 13, 2009 Share Posted November 13, 2009 I love shopping for Christmas pressies and am nearly done My neice and nephew (3 & 7) are spoilt rotten, but they are children and that is what Christmas is about, children. I don't spend huge amounts, but get them lots of little things, all wrapped up and put in a stocking each. Hawkins bazaar is great for Nephew, lots of bits like a whoppee cushion, green slime etc. Last year he spent hours playing with a paper plane that cost 35p. For my Parents, Brother and SIL, Gran etc, they get hampers with added extras. It usually costs more to give hampers I think, but I love making them and they are appreciated by all - especially if there is Spiced cranberry vodka (thanks Cinnamon ) or blackberry vodka inside. We agree every year to scale it down and never do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted November 13, 2009 Share Posted November 13, 2009 Its been proper scaled down here - a few family members buy things for James but that's it - only other kids are my cousins kids and Mum buys them something as her sister buys James something but that's it. We don't buy a lot for each other really, few small bits for James - he is not a child who wants a lot - he did want the magic tooth fairy game (despite that he never plays games!) but he bought that already - for 50p at a boot sale! He gets loads of stuff from his Dad, who puts as little thought into it as possible. Last year he delivered James home saying "thats every Ben 10 figure there is" - James barely knows who Ben 10 is, they have all been "recycled" as birthday presents this year. This year I suggested that he TELLS Daddy what he is into (he is the most imaginative child and loves role play). I make some gift baskets for a few special people. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
