Cube mk2 and WIR

[Kathy C]

feather extensions

Brilliant!

 

Boat made of glugs - My hens could do with that today.

 

 

 

It's definately worth waiting for. Great to have you back Shona.

[Guest]

DAY 22 IN THE BIG CHICKEN EGLU

 

Big Chicken can be evil some days, and some days the almighty Chook can be kind, but no-one locked in the Big Chicken Eglu was expecting a twist like the one that BC had up his sleeve for today. As the househens clucked innocently over the growing attraction between newcomer Liam and grouchy Bluebelle Nicky, they were unaware of the drama waiting to unfold.

 

Welbar Liam, not scared about admitting to sharing his love amongst the flocks of free-range hens back home, has been more than happy to spend his time scratching about the eglu run, sharing the odd lost snail with the Bluebelle, much to the consternation of the girlies looking for love. Even 'Chiggy' was interested, fearing they would be overtaken in the bid for the race for the coveted cover shot on Practical Poultry magazine.

 

All thoughts of fame after Big Chicken were quickly forgotten however, when they were all called to the tree stump in the garden, and Big Chicken made a shocking announcement that this years prize fund, 100,000kg of mealworms, was in the diary room, and that by the end of the night, it would belong to one of them. After a tantalising 30 minutes, Big Chicken called Carole, Seanny and Jonathan into the diary room, and the rest of the househens were left listening intently. Unfortunately for the three in the Diary Room, they were informed that, because they were the three househens facing the public vote this week, they would be unable to win the mealworms. "Tough tittys" Big Chicken commiserated with the unfortunate three, before informing them that they would have to choose who would win the lives supply of mealworms. After much clucking and pecking the three decided that romeo Welbar Liam would be the deserving winner, and to say that Liam was shell-shocked by the decision would be an understatement. Poor Bluebelle Nicky was soon pushed out of the way by Charley, and the two were left fighting for the affections of the worm-rich cockerel.

 

With the prize out of the way, the househens have been left fighting for pride, column inches and advertising deals. Or have they.............

Edited June 30, 2007 by Guest

[Guest]

It's definately worth waiting for. Great to have you back Shona.

 

 

Awe shucks, ta!

[kannie]

... over-tired Bluebelle Nicky called Norfolk Grey Carole a 'stupid of crow' amd pulled a full beakful of feathers from the aging birds tail. ............

......... Charley appeared to undergo a partial moult in 5 minutes, and it was an embarrassed househen who admitted to the flock that she was in fact a vain Naked Neck, who had entered the house with feather extensions in.

Interesting! The things you (i.e. I) miss! Thanks chookiehen!

[Jules.]

Shona- are you out there? Are you OK?

[Lesley]

more internet problems I think

[Guest]

Hi, sorry -still having computer/internet problems - I did come on this morning, did a MASSIVE update, that took me an hour to do, then just as I got to the end, my internet cut out, and my s"Ooops, word censored!"y laptop closed down and I lost the lot.

 

Will come on after I've got the children to bed tonight, and as Gina has suggested, do the whole thing on word before cranking the old interent up, and moving it over in one fell swoop.

 

Sorry to all the BC readers - Big Chicken will get back to you ASAP!

[Jules.]

glad to hear it! It's v annoying when that happens

[Guest]

DAY 23 IN THE BIG CHICKEN EGLU

 

Some girls go for a fine set of wattles, some girls go for big red combs and then there are the girls that are attracted to cockerels well-endowed in the meal-worm stakes, and after the decision made by unlucky eviction nominees Jonathan, Carole and Seanny, the true colours of some of this years househens shone brightly through. Despite Welbar Liams cheeky grin and loud crow, only Bluebelle Nicky had been showing the cockerel any interest up until he became the proud recipient of 100,000kg of mealworms, but he awoke to find himself the centre of all the females attention. While Nicky coyly offered to share her morning pellets, and twintastic White Stars Amanda and Sam moved over to make room in their dust bath, loudmouth Frizzle Charley made her intentions clear from daybreak, “Look Liam-pops,” she clucked to the cornered Welbar, “You and me - in the nest box, in ten minutes - we can show ‘Chiggy’ how it’s done, and we’ll get the Practical Poultry cover-shoot sewn up. We’ll split the dosh 80/20, cause you’ve already got the big prize, and we’ll buy a Cube in the sun, and I can eat all the mealworms”, leaving poor Liam trembling with fear, and terrified to go near Charley for fear of being jumped.

 

Elsewhere, ‘Ziggelle’ has come under threat from newboy Billi, with the Maran muscling in on Ziggys girl. With the Eglu’s first romance of 2007 under increasing strain, Bovans Nera, Channelle had decided to seek out a distraction from the constant feather-pulling that she and Ziggy were sharing, and joined Billi in the dust bath, much to the Cream leg bars disgust. With the sight of his girlfriend frolicking in the compost with his rival too much to bear, Ziggy took her aside and told her it was over, leaving Channelle seeking solace from Billi. Sadly, the vain Maran had only been interested in causing trouble, and before long Channelle was left snivelling, alone in the run. Unable to watch the upset he had caused, Ziggy gathered the forlorn Nera up, and carried her off to the Eglu for a night of snuggling and beak-locking.

 

Aaaaaaah, there’s nothing like a happy ending, and something tells us that this is nothing like a happy ending……

 

 

DAY 24 IN THE BIG CHICKEN EGLU

 

There’s nothing worse than trying to prepare for a big night in the Big Chicken Eglu, after a disturbed nights sleep, but this is what faced the three househens up for the chop, after lusty ‘Chiggy’ kept their fellow househens awake half the night, with their noisy, and slurpy, reunion in the Eglu overnight. Baggy eyed and grumpy, the househens stumbled out of the Eglu and spent an ill-tempered day, bickering over the morning glug and grub. As if being up for eviction wasn’t enough to put Norfolk Grey Carole in the doldrums, her mood was tested even further when Big Chicken instructed her, along with Ziggy, to scratch out 100 lines each in the run, as punishment for talking about last weeks nominations. With the fateful hour drawing closer and closer for Carole, she was less than impressed at being told to waste her day, when she could have been having a dust bath and washing her feathers, in preparation for the evenings news.

 

So it was a slightly grubby arole that joined her fellow househens on the tree-stump in the garden, to learn who was to be the next househen to take the trip to the pie factory. With both Carole and Jonathan convinced that it would be one of them, the househens were sent into shock when Davina McCaw announced that it woul in fact be irritating White Star, Seanny who would be the second househen to be evicted from Big Chicken 2007.

 

 

DAY 25 IN THE BIG CHICKEN EGLU

 

Seanny may have been an irritating joker amongst the househens, but the morning started with tears, as the full impact of the previous nights eviction was felt. Aware that grumpy, sad househens make for rubbish TV, Big Chicken gathered the househens into the garden and announced a competition to find the Big Chicken Angular Ankle champion for 2007, with the promise of a grand prize befitting such an honour. With much giggling, the househens got their ankles out, and were soon shrieking with delight, as the opening bars of ‘Agadoo’ resonated through the run. Soon judging began, as the househens danced the morning away, pushing their pineapple, shaking a tree, until the decision was made, and frizzle Charley and Sussex Star Brian, were announced as ‘Mr and Mrs Angular Ankle 2007’, and were called to the diary room to receive their prize. Their delight soon turned to horror, as they were informed that their prize for having such bony legs was to spend the night in the Big Chicken Ark, a wooden monstrosity at the end of the garden, riddled with red-mite, and smelling of long forgotten layers mash. With nothing but dry bread and water for their hungry tummies, the pair were soon trying to find other ways to amuse themselves. Luckily Big Chicken had thought of all eventualities, and provided the holidaying pair with tradition wet-weather pastimes of travel-scrabble and tri-onimoes to pass the time away.

 

DAY 26 IN THE BIG CHICKEN EGLU

 

Daybreak couldn’t come quick enough for unlikely Ark-partners Charley and Brian, as they suffered from a night of sharing the creaky ark with a whole clutch of red-mite. Luckily for the twosome, Big Chicken allowed them to leave early, thanks to impeccable behaviour through the night, and the two were ushered to the bottom of the garden to have an enormous dust bath in redmite powder and diatom, before being allowed to join the main flock again. As way of an apology, Big Chicken provided the bitten househens with a party of cheesy-puffs and Bacardi breezers, to lighten up the mood in the Eglu. With ‘Chiggy’ on the ropes (again……), the atmosphere in the house was already strained, so the news that this weeks food task would be starting was greeted with groans and despair. The news that the food task would involve an enormous feat of endurance, with Big Chicken asking the houshens to stay away for 60 hours was not well received, and almost immediately, the cracks began to show, with certain househens already wanting to go to the roosting bars for the night. With the prospect of no roosting for another 50 hours (they were already one sixth of the way there, as they’d all been up for 10 hours already), they were all left wondering how they could stay away. The boys took themselves off to the run, to indulge in a bit of girly gossiping, while the girlies took themselves off to the dust baths, to bathe the night away.

 

 

DAY 27 IN THE BIG CHICKEN EGLU

 

As day 26 turned into day 27, the househens continued to try and find ways to fill the endless hours of wakefulness. Bluebelle Nicky continued with her lustful watching of Welbar Liam, chesty Rhode Island Red Laura continued to eat all the pies and poor Carole wedged her eyes open with twigs. It was clear that Big Chicken needed to rouse the househens, and what better way to do that by having this weeks nominations in the middle of the night. Bleary eyed, and grumpy, the househens filed into the diary room, one by one, to make their nominations, then it was down to the weekly task - nothing more difficult than to stay awake. Big Chicken, determined to make the task even more difficult for the exhausted househens, called ‘Cheesy Quaver, All-night Raver’ Tracey to the diary room, only for the Gingernut Ranger to find the diary room kitted out with comfortable barley straw, shredded paper and peaceful whale noises gently playing in the background. “Take a seat please, Tracey,” invited the dulcet tones of Big Chicken, “Are you feeling sleepy? Perhaps a warming glass of hot milk would make you feel better?” he continued, “Or a plate of turkey perhaps?” But the Gingernut Ranger stood strong, refusing all of Big Chickens attempts to induce sleep, and she positively bounced out, back into the run, to share her experience with the rest of the eglu. With Big Chickens evil plan to lull them to sleep unveiled, the househens became even more determined to win the task, and decided that keeping moving would be the best plan. With Carole in charge, the househens embarked on a round of ‘musical chairs’, with Ziggy and Gerry providing the music, followed by a round of ‘musical bumps’. Sadly, the idea of playing ‘heads down, thumbs up’ had less success, and before long Laura could be heard to be snoring gently against the glug. She was quickly woken, and the househens got back to the task of staying awake.

 

As the day went on, the lack of sleep started to take its toll, and tempers began to fray, most noticeably with Frizzle Charley, (no surprise there, really!), as some of the househesn began to consider giving up the task, and living off of basic rations for the next week. Despite the fact that Charley has managed to get her dandelion leaf habit down to only 10 a day in the house, the thought of not having enough money in the food budget to buy any dandelion leaves for the next week filled her with horror, and she was furious at the lack of drive from the other househens. As resolve failed, they took a vote, and while the ‘stay-awake’ crew beat the ‘go to sleep’ crew, it was a close call, and as the day drew to an end, failure seemed inevitable.

 

 

Another update to follow.....

[Guest]

DAY 28 IN THE BIG CHICKEN EGLU

 

Day 27 ran gently into day 28 with not a snore or a sleepy murmur to be heard. As the sleep deprivation task slowly rumbled on, tempers frayed and arguments started to break out all over the compound. Just after midnight, it became apparent to the weary househens that this was one task that was beyond their capabilities, and at 00:15hrs, they admitted defeat, and voted for sleep. Aware that this meant that Big Chicken would possibly sneak in while they were asleep, and steal the remaining food bought with last weeks luxury food budget, the canny househens set about stashing as much food as they could under the roosting bars, before succumbing to tiredness and settling down in the Eglu for a much needed sleep. It took a full 11 and a half hours before Big Chicken was able to arouse the househens from their slumbering, and even then, it was only with the news that this weeks nominations were about to be announced. Sleepy eyed and yawning, the househens gathered on the tree stump in the garden to hear the news they were all dreading. Reactions were muted as Big Chicken announced that the househens facing the public vote this week would be Carole, Billi, Tracey, Nicky and Charley, before adding that, because of nominations chat between Charley and Billi earlier in the week, the nominations cast by the guilty pair would not be considered, therefore only Billi, Tracey and Carole would face the voting public. Shattered by the knowledge that his loose tongue had caused frizzle Charley to escape the public vote yet again, Billi defiantly faced his fellow househens with a warning, “I aint goin’ nowhere this week” he shouted, “my public will save me to fight another day. The girlies out there can’t get enough of Billi-boy - I’ll be here to fight another week, to shut that gobby Frizzle up when she starts.” Unimpressed with Billis confident stance, the rest of the househens gathered around Carole and Tracey to sympathise with the pair who would again fave eviction. Determined to enjoy what could be his final days in the Eglu, Billi went to the Eglu to rescue a tub of carrot peelings he had stashed under the roosting bars, only to find that Big Chicken had been there before him, and had removed all the hidden booty. But Big Chicken would never allow the househens to starve, so kindly provided each of them with a dog bowl full of nutritionally balanced gruel, with the instructions that each bowl of slop must be finished by the househen named on the bowl, without any help, and without pouring it down the sink. Convinced that Big Chicken wouldn’t force them all to celebrate the twintastic birthday of Sam and Amanda in the morning, with nothing but gruel and water, the househens toddled off for an early night, to try and catch up with some much needed ‘zzzzzz’s’

 

 

DAY 29 IN THE BIG CHICKEN EGLU

 

“You’re pinky, You’re dinky, You’re pretty blumming stinky, I’m red-dy, Not neddy, I‘m like a fluffy teddy! Dontcha luv it??!” was the song that rang through the house this morning, as excitable birthday girls Sam and Amanda woke up to their birthday in the Big Chicken Eglu. The jolly mood was short lived, as breakfast was delivered, and the househens were gutted to discover that Big Chicken intended on punishing them properly for failing this weeks task - more gruel and water was on the menu, much to the houshens disgust. As the general mood in the Big Chicken Eglu had failed to improve, thanks to the group failure at this weeks food task, Big Chicken took it upon himself to remove the two most irksome houshens from the flock, and put them in their very own ‘happy hen house’, with instructions that they MUST enjoy themselves until further notice. Unable to cope with the concept of ‘happiness’, Frizzle charley ran around the room clucking, before sitting down on a cosy pink beanbag, and laying a rather large whopper of an egg. Much relieved, Charley could set her sights on enjoying herself, aided fully by Big Chickens instance that they ‘boogie on down’, complete with maracas and kazoos. After dancing their way through ‘The Birdie Dance‘, ‘The Macarena’ and Wigfields ‘Saturday Night’, Big Chicken was interested in the mood of the grumpy pair, “Are we happy hens?” asked the almighty chook, “Yeeeeeehaaaaaa!!!!!” retorted a giddy Charley, joined with an unenthusiastic “Yeah” from Billy, “Big Chicken can’t hear yooooouuuuuu! Are we HAPPEEEEE HAPPEEEEE HENS????!” came the voice from above, “YYYYYYEEEEEAAAAGH!!!!!!!!” replied the Model Maran and grumpy Frizzle, only to be greeted with the opening bars of ‘Bob The Builder’. Big Chicken clearly didn’t agree with them! After one final boogie, Big Chicken agreed that they were in fact happy hens, and released the pair back into the main run.

 

Not one to miss the opportunity for a party, later on in the evening, Big Chicken hosted a ‘pinky-poo party’ for the birthday chooks, complete with pink feather boas, pink glittery stetsons and pink cups and plates. Oh, and pink food. Only in traditional Bad Big Chicken style, the ‘pinky-poo’ party food, was just that -pink poo - and it was hungry and disappointed househens that made their way to the Eglu for the nightly lock-in.

 

 

 

 

[Lesley]

Brilliant Shona - thank you

[xChicken04x]

that is seriously funny

[Guest]

DAY 30 IN THE BIG CHICKEN EGLU

 

‘Evil’, ‘twisted’, ‘dastardly’. All words that have been used this year by the househens to describe Big Chicken. ‘Generous’ is not a word that would usually be used, but Big Chicken showed his generous side, when it gave the hungry househens a chance to yodel for a full grub of pellets for breakfast, instead of the portions of gruel, waiting for them in the garden. With the scent of warmed pellets wafting through the eglu, it wasn’t long before the househens were yodelling like troopers, and the Big Chicken compound became uncannily similar to an Alpine mountainside. Sufficiently impressed with the “Yodel-eh-hoo’s” coming from the flock, Big Chicken generously delivered the pellets, and the househens settled in for a morning in the run.

 

Eager to sample the joys of the ‘happy hen house’ Twintastic White Stars Amanda and Sam decided to stage an argument in the nesting box, in the hope that Big Chicken would send them off to ‘boogie on down’ for an hour or so. Checking around, to make sure the cameras were watching the pair, Amanda (or was it Sam….) started the tirade. “For god sake Amanda,” (ahhhh….must have been Sam then!), “Get your big fat bottom over a bit - two of us have to fit in here to lay, you know” Sam clucked. Stifling a giggle, Amanda joined in, “I can’t make anymore space - you’re fat frilly bum feathers are tickling my nose - turn around, rather than top and tailing, you fat MOOSE!”. Sadly for the twins, Big Chicken is far to clever to be taken in by such a pathetic attempt, and the pair were left to rejoin the main flock, once their eggs had been laid.

 

DAY 31 IN THE BIG CHICKEN EGLU

 

You would think with eviction day dawning, the househens would show a bit of enthusiasm on a Friday, but this flock of dozy chooks were far from enthusiastic about getting up, with several of the househens popping on and off the roosting bars a couple of times, before anyone made a move to the glug and grubs for breakfast. With drizzle falling, the sleepy flock to the opportunity to give the rancid red mite riddled ark at the bottom of the garden a good scrub, and the househens congregated in the shelter to cluck the morning away, while Billi, Tracey and Carole got on with the essential dust bath and spruce up required before the eviction decision was announced.

 

With the househens gathered on the tree stump to await the news from Davina, Maran Billi couldn’t resist another swipe at arch enemy, Charley. “Happy hen house?” he hissed, “you wouldn’t know how to be happy if a clown came and tickled under your wings. Just wait till next week, it’ll be you and me up against each other, love - then you’ll see who the voting public down at the farm love more. ‘Happy hen’ my backside, you grumpy-faced disaster….” The smirk was soon wiped from his beak, however, when Davina McCaw informed a shocked flock that the voting public down at the farm had in fact voted Billi out, so his much desired showdown with Frizzle Charley was never going to happen. Clearly shocked, the househens bundled Billi out the run door, to the awaiting press and public, and got right down to their favourite thing - slagging off their recently departed friend. It soon became clear that not one of the househens actually like the departed model - all citing his grumpy nature and sheer vanity amongst the reasons for not liking him.

 

With Billi gone, there was a little bit more space in the Eglu and Charley made the most of the extra space, as she “Agadoo’ed” on down at midnight, and her birthday dawned. Hopeful of a party, the househens took themselves off to sleep, before anyone did anything to put Big Chicken in a bad mood.

 

DAY 32 IN THE BIG CHICKEN EGLU

 

The whispering started early in the Eglu, as the househens discussed quietly how to celebrate Frizzle Charleys birthday in style. While Campine Gerry and Welbar Liam giggled at the thought of ‘accidentally forgetting’ the Frizzles birthday, Norfolk Grey Carole took a more pragmatic view about the impending celebrations, “Look, if we don’t do something, then all hell will break loose - you’ve seen what she’s like when she’s happy, so gawd only knows what she’d be like if we didn’t celebrate her birthday in style! I vote for a scented dust bath, followed by first go at the morning grub for starters” suggested the Norfolk Grey, “followed by a comb massage from Gerry”. With the houshens in agreement, Big Chicken opened the Eglu door for the day, and the flock busied themselves with preparations for the Frizzles big day.

 

Ever generous Big Chicken decided to give the househens the chance to further enhance Charleys enjoyment, by giving the choice of a party or a bumper hamper of food, to see them through till their next shopping delivery. Aware that the wrong choice (ie the hamper of food) would send the Frizzle ‘off on one’, the flock rather sensibly chose the party, and it was with great delight that they took delivery of a large trug filled with party food (mealworms, strawberry tops and sweet corn) and the obligatory bottle of cherry brandy. With Charley choosing a ‘Moulhen Rouge’ theme for her party, Big Chicken also provided the partying housens with costumes, and before long they were bumping and grinding to ‘Henny Marmalade’, unaware that the birthday chook had swiped the cherry brandy, and was sitting behind the tree stump, finishing off the bottle.

 

Charley is like a bear with a sore head at the best of times, so goodness knows what she’ll be like with a hangover……..

[theherd123]

 

Just class, thank you Shona!

[Popcorn]

Love it love it love it!

 

I've missed the last few shows so it's good to catch up! Thanks Shona.

 

(I really want to send this to Dermot!)

[Jules.]

Shona- can we cut & paste this (or is it copy & paste, I can never remember?!) to Dermot? I'm sure he would love it

[Guest]

 

You are all so kind with the praise, but I'd be mortified if the delish Dermot read this - imagine how gutting it would be if he didn't like it!

 

anyway - I've still got a few days to catch up with, so once I've taken the children into Berwick, I'll come back and try and get totally uptodate!

[Jules.]

I'm sure he would love it. Right up his street.

you might get to meet him..........

[Guest]

DAY 33 IN THE BIG CHICKEN EGLU

 

‘Insightful’ is not a word that could really be used to describe this years flock of househens, so when Big Chicken called for the most insightful househen to come to the diary room, the expected scuffle was not long in starting. In a race reminiscent of the Grand National, a stampede to the diary room ensued, with Norfolk Grey, Carole pipping the chaps to the winners post (the diary room door). Once inside, Carole was informed that she would have to pick the seven houshens that most closely displayed the characteristics of the Seven Deadly Sins - some proving easy, some not so easy to decide upon - she picked Laura for Sloth, Liam for Lust, Tracey for Greed, Ziggy for Gluttony, Amanda for Pride, Nicki for Envy and, who else, but Charley for Wrath. The news that these seven househens would be solely responsible for winning or losing this weeks shopping budget was not greeted with great enthusiasm from the rest of the angelic househens, with several doubting that grumpy Frizzle Charley could last more than 30 seconds with arguing with someone. “What the *^$*@# do you mean, I can’t stop arguing?!” screeched the Wrathful househen, “You are a bunch of cheeky old *^%$£%^*’s, you are!!! That is so *^**)%`¬ unbelievable that you have so litlle )(^**% faith in my ability to keep my &%$£$ temper!!”. Errr….yes Charley, hard to believe, eh?

 

First to be called to the diary room was Proud White Star Amanda, who was instructed by Big Chicken to don the carrot costume provided for her, with the warning that ‘Proud chooks must embrace the ‘ginger’ “ if indeed they wish to absolve their sins. Confiscating her comb-gloss and feather-straighteners for good measure, Big Chicken sent the ’carrot’ back out into the Eglu, with instructions to not gaze at herself in the mirror.

 

Next up was Queen Wrathful herself, Charley, who was warned by Big Chicken that any form of anger over the next 48 hours would be deemed a failure - ruling out screeching, arguing, feather-plucking, vent-pecking and even loud clucking directed at her fellow househens. The fiesty chook was then ejected from the Eglu, with the warning ringing in her ears, beak first into the mud bath that had appeared in the run overnight, but the frizzle managed to hold her temper. For now……

 

Last in for the day was Gluttonous Ziggy, who was let into a room containing a banquet fit for the top chooks at Omlet. Plates groaning with mealworms, sweet corn, pellets, tomatoes, spinach and every other food that would make a hungry cockerel go weak at the knees was laid out before the Cream Legbar, with a note informing him that he could eat, be merry and incur a failure for the group. But atleast he’d have a full tummy. But Ziggy, aware that his nonsense with on-off-on-off girlfriend Channelle was really beginning to tick the rest of the flock off, stayed strong, and despite dribbling all down his wattles, managed to resist the temptation, and therefore became the first of the seven househens to score a win in the food task.

 

Things were looking good with Ziggys pass, and Amanda sticking firmly to the rules (who would want to gaze in a mirror while dressed up as a carrot?!), until just after midnight, Charley lost the plot when a slug took a wrong turn, and ended up in the run. Brian, hungry after a week of basic food, jumped at the chance to gobble the tasty morsel, leaving Charley shrieking in disgust “That was MY %$£%^ SLUG!!!! You greedy *&”~#&!!! I saw it first!!!!

 

That’ll be a fail for Charley then…..

[theherd123]

 

This just gets better!

[susanbb]

 

Susan

[Lesley]

I'm spluttering over the keyboard again

[kannie]

Good good good - its just so good!!!

[Guest]

DAY 34 IN THE BIG CHICKEN EGLU

 

What on earth can you do with a lustful cockerel, in a bid to help them repent their sin? Big Chicken has a way - dress the sinful chap up in, well……chaps and a stetson, and sit them in front of recording of some charming chooks dancing the can-can, flashing their frilly-knicker feathers, all the time recording his heart-beat. Lustful Welbar, Liam was asked to just that, in an effort to gain another pass for the househens in this weeks food task. After passing the test with flying colours, and a steady heartbeat, Big Chicken raised the stakes by bringing in his favourite film star, Camheron Diaz, to sweet-talk the cockerel. “You’re looking mighty fine in those chaps, you sexy boy.” clucked the blonde beauty, “What big wattles you have…..I love a cockerel with a big, firm comb…”. But Liam stood firm, as did his heart-rate, and scored the groups second pass in the food task.

 

Next into the Room of Repentance (AKA The Diary Room) was envious Nicky, who was faced with herself, smiling, glowering, giggling and grimacing from every nook and cranny. After being instructed by Big Chicken to “kick back and take it all in”, the Bluebelle was serenaded by the almighty Chook with the Ditty of Nicky.

 

“Nicky, lovely Nicky

What a gorgeous Chicky!

Never very picky

When it comes to food.

 

Nicky, lovely Nicky

How I’d love to licky

Would you like a biccie

With your cuppa tea?

 

Nicky, lovely Nicky

You make my heart go ticky

Much prettier than Ricky

From old Albert Square”

After listening to the Ditty of Nicky for 2 hours, Big Chicken asked the Bluebelle to give 10 reasons why she should be thankful for being herself, before letting her back out into the run, still humming her very own ditty to herself.

 

Tracey was next in, and Big Chicken did his best to tempt the greedy girl with some amazing offers, but even when she was offered 2 sacks of layers pellets, a shiny new glug and grub, a pair of rusty roller skates, 2 miniatures of advocaat, a bag of dandelion leaves and six bags of shredded paper for the nesting box, all in return for 1 failure in the task, the Gingernut Ranger sat firm (party to do with the fact she was in the middle of laying), and refused the generous offer, notching up another pass for the group.

 

Last in was the laziest chook in the run, Laura, who was instructed by Big Chicken to do star jumps in the garden, while reciting the green cross code until further notice. Everyone knows that the Rhode Island Red has been overly blessed in the ‘fillets’ department, so the cockerels gathered in the garden to watch and encourage the Sloth in her task. She was left jumping, until Big Chicken called them all to the tree stump to announce the nominations for the week. The flock was left reeling when it was announced that one half of ‘Chiggy’ (Channelle) and the out of breath Laura were facing the public vote for this weeks trip to the pie factory.

 

After pausing for just a second, Big Chicken then took the opportunity to give the full results of the weeks food task, announcing that all but Wrathful Charley had repented their sins, so they could expect to be rewarded with a party later in the evening. The flock celebrated, but the celebrations were short-lived for short-tempered Charley, when Big Chicken excluded her from the evenings jollities. With the grumpy Frizzle launching into a verbal tirade that would make even a hardened squaddie blush, Big Chicken had no alternative but to lock her in the wooden ark at the bottom of the garden for the evening, whilst the rest of the flock partied.

[Snowy]