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Day 3 began with a bout of restelessness in the Big Chicken Eglu, as the househens awoke to another day of full girlieness, with not a male comb to be seen. It was also the scene of the unlikely picture of Buttercup Lesley trying to wrestle with the camping stove, in a bid to make her fellow househens a warming breakfast of porridge and raisins. Pouncing upon self-confessed 'cheesy quaver' Tracey to help her, the unlikey team set about trying to work out how to connect the gas cylinder to get the camping stove going. The Big Chicken live internet feed had to be cut, as the girls *(^$^*&^*'d and ^$&*%^**!!£"!'d their morning away, and were left none the wiser on the intricate workings of the stove.


So it was a hungry flock of ladyees who were gathered in the garden by Big Chicken for their first big surprise of this years Big Chicken. Aware that the girls were getting restless, and that even happy hens can start feather-plucking and vent pecking when starved of male attention, Big Chicken enlivened the group by introducing the first cockerel of the series into the Eglu. Cream Legbar, Ziggy, is a confident cockerel with a string of buxom conquests in his past, and he's determined to win: "No-one remembers who came in second, not even when they eat the pie". His introduction into the Eglu send the girls into a frenzy of preening, and within seconds of Ziggys arrival the dustbath was full to bursting - even Lesley and Carole disappeared to tart themselves up, leaving Ziggy watching bemused as a fight ensued over the feather-driers in the Eglu. However, as the househens delightedly clucked around the newcomer, sharing out the remaining pellets and mash, Big Chicken had one last surprise up his sleeve for the original 11 Househens - Ziggy would be the only househen to nominate this week, so those who don't impress the Legbar could be in trouble next week.


However, it appears that one girl is already safe, as the cockerel confessed to Big Chicken later that one hen had already caught his eye, and that he quite fancied his chances with Bleached Bovans Nera, Channelle. But will WAG-wanabe Channelle be interested in a failed chook-band singer such as Ziggy? Only time will tell.....

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Cream Legbar, Ziggy, had an uncomfortable morning on his first full day in the Big Chicken Eglu, as the girls, buoyed by the presence of the handsome cockerel, spent a blissful morning in the sun, discussing their dream wedding. "If I ever get married," started Bovans Nera, Channelle, "I'd make my hubbie have my name tattooed on his comb, so all the other girls in the run knew that he was mine". This was met with universal approval from her fellow househens, and it wasn't long before others were chipping in with their ideas. "I want my hubbie-to-be to pop the question with a ring made from dandelion leaves" fantasised Emily. the Blue Cochine explained why, "Then we could gobble it up, and go buy a proper rock of my choice" she clucked, prompting a ripple of approval from the girls. All the girls agreed, however, that their dream day would definitely include a walk down the aisle in Chickminster Abbey, with a honeymoon in the honeymoon suite of the Blue Eglu Cube in Bali. Self-confessed Chook-man, Ziggy, scratched about uncomfortably in the garden, trying to distance himself from the conversation, for fear that one of the househens tied him down, and made him name the day.


However, the pleasant morning was soon forgotten when the househens settled down to tuck into a lunch of mealworms and oystergrit. Tensions had been rising throughout the morning between Buff Frizzle, Charley, and the rest of the househens, who she felt were eating more than their fair share of the layers pellets. "I'm just a skinny wee thing", she shrieked at Big Chicken, "I'm all feathers! Pick me up and you'll feel that I'm all skin and bone". Flattered, but disappointed, Big Chicken had to decline the Frizzles kind offer, and sent her off with an extra cup of veggie peeling to fill her up before bedtime.


As nighttime fell upon the Big Chicken Eglu, and the househens took themsleves off to the roosting bars for the night, there were two figures left scratching in the garden together, long after dusk. Channelle and Ziggy clucked and scratched quietly with each other, till Big Chicken chased them in and the Eglu door was closed for the night.


Could there really be romance in the air?

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The househens spent the day in thoughtful moods, as it became clear that Cream Legbar, Ziggy only had eyes for Bovans Nera Channelle. With Ziggy's nomination date with Big Chicken growing closer, the remaing househen began to hatch new ideas to keep themselves on the good side of the young cockerel. While busty Laura planned on nestling her bosom close to the cockerel in the roosting bars late at night, the 'twintastic' leghorns, Sam and Amanda secretly planned to corner the Legbar in the garden, and share a secret supply of woodlice and snails that they had found, secreted under the water-butt. In fact, all the househens had bribery on their minds, while Channelle and Ziggy scratched the morning away, blissfully imagining themselves as the next Posh and Pecks.


But devious Big Chicken had other things on his mind, and instructed Ziggy to spend an evening wining and dining each of the househens - each househen would be invited to one course of an enormous 11-course banquet, with Ziggy being made to eat each course as well. With Big Chicken serving up a delicious delicacy for each course, Ziggy was in for a full crop, and a delightful evening of flirting with each girl desperate to impress. All the househens busied themselves, preening and plucking to within an inch of their lives, and before long, Ziggy was dining on the first course - a grub full of strawberry tops and sweetcorn, shared with Gingernut Ranger, Tracey, all washed down with a glass of Malibu. As the eveing wore on, Ziggy sat through courses of fresh slugs and brandy, mixed corn and creme de menthe, spinach and blue bols, lettuce leaves and peach schnapps, porridge and amaretto and layers pellets and advocaat before he got his dream date with Channelle accompianed by cloverflowers and garlic water. As the couple clucked the evening away, the rest of the househens were left wondering which of them Ziggy would nominate for eviction and the one-way trip to the pie factory.

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Day 6 in the Big Chicken Eglu saw the first of the weekly grub tasks, with a luxury shopping basket full of layers pellets and mash, sweetcorn and all the veggie peelings the househens could eat up for grabs, along with a bottle of Midori and a case of Bacardi Breezers if they won. If they lost, a week of grass clippings and water from the water-butt was all they had to look forward to.


The task seemed easy enough, newcomer Ziggy had to rank the girls from one to eleven on comb redness, who had the prettiest feet and who was most courteous around the Glug and Grub. While the Cream Legbar pondered over these questions in the diary room, the househens were outside, arguing the same points amongst themselves - if they agreed with Ziggys' opinion then they would win the hamper - if there was more than five that didn;t match, then it would be the contents of the flymo clipping box for dinner. It was obvious in Ziggy's mind that Bovans Nera Channelle would be top on all accounts, but pushy Buff Frizzle, Charely was insistant that he would have her tops for prettiest feet and comb redness, and poor Channelle was dumped down to second place, much to her disgust. The Buff Frizzle was left fuming, however, when she realised that the cockerel didn;t share the high opinions that she had of herself, and had her bottom in all three catagories. At the end of the task, Ziggy and the househens ahd only managed to match up a pathetic 2 out of the 33 spots in total, so had failed the food task miserably.


The desolate househens were left to ponder the prospect of a hungry week, and tempers were frayed even more when Big Chicken gathered them in the Eglu, and announced that the nesting box would be out of bounds indefinately, after Wynadotte Shabnam was heard to be trying to influence Ziggys nominations, after she had pleaded with him to put her up for the trip to the pie factory this weekend. Big Chicken takes breaches of the rules very seriously, and this was no exception. The househens were instructed that they would be allowed to use an old straw-lined pot in the garden when they needed to lay, and when the girls protestations fell on deaf ears.


As the girls flounced out into the garden, a fight broke out over a half-eaten snail, and pretty soon feathers were being pulled and combs pecked. It was down to the male influence in the Eglu to calm things down, as he shared around some mouldy potato peelings that he had saved from last nights dinner dates, and promised not to peek when the girls were laying in the pot in the garden. The chickens went to roost with full tummies, and worried minds, as Ziggys day for nominations came ever closer.

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The Househens facing the trip to the pie factory this week are....





Big Chicken will return later with your day 7 update...

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Day seven saw a birthday in the Big Chicken Eglu, so the day started with a resounding redition of the Birdie Dance, with all the Househens serenading birthday chook, Tracey. "Cheesy quavers, happy ravers" gushed the slightly incoherent birthday girl, tiddly at 8:30 in the morning, after Big Chicken slipped a drop of peach schnapps into her early morning cup of garlic water from the water-butt. As the final notes of the Birdie Dance faded into silence, the househens were left to ponder what on earth they could do with a drunken Gingernut early in the morning......


Before long, it was time for cockerel Ziggy to enter the diary room, and make the first nominations in this years Big Chicken, The househens had used up a lot of energy trying to impress the Cream Legbar since his arrival on Saturday, but only Bovans Nera Channelle could really feel confident of her place in the Eglu as Ziggy entered the diary room. There was no surprises when Ziggy first nominated Blue Cochine Emily, who had reacted badly when she realised that Channelle had beaten her in the competition for Ziggys affections. The Cochine had been going out of her way over the past 48 hours to make sure that she got a sly peck at the Bovans Nera when she passed, and had got into the habit of shoving her off the nesting box whenever she could. But even Big Chicken can be surprised, and instead of a nomination for abrasive Buff Frizzle Charley, Ziggy surprised everyone at Big Chicken by nominating Shabnam. Although the Wynadotte had begged Ziggy to nominate her (getting them both into trouble), no-one had expected him to do anything about, but he lived up to his promise and nominated the Wynadotte for the trip to the pie factory. He slipped out of the diaryroom and went into hiding in the garden, desperate to avoid the glances of the househens, all who were desperate for a hint about who would be up for evicition.


Things settled quickly, and the househens busied themselves in the eglu, cleaning out the poo tray, and scratching about in the garden, and things seemed contented in the Big Chicken Eglu. Sadly, as all Big Chicken fans know, the peace couldn't last for long, and before long Emily was back to her usual ways, pecking at Channelles tail feathers when noone was looking. Poor channelle was left in tears, and it was left to ziggy to step up and defend his chook. Emily was left in no doubt about how the cockerel felt about her and her nonsense, and the househens went in for the night, to be greeted by the Cochine crying quietly on the roosting bars.


Goodness knows how she'll react in the morning to the news about her eviction nomination....

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Day 8 in the Big Chicken Eglu was one of those days that will stand out in Big Chicken history, for all thw rong reasons. The day started early with Big Chicken summoning the Househens into the Eglu, to announce who would be up for evicition this week. The girls were tense, as only Cream Legbar Ziggy had been allowed to nominate, and he had played his cards close to his chest, so no-one had a clue who would be up. Emily's name was the first to be read out, with Shabnam second, and the two househens took the news squarely on the chin. Wynadotte Shabnam is desperate to get out, and follow her dream of making a really good chicken and leek pie, while Blue Cochine Emily had known her time in the Eglu could be limited, following a series of feather-pulling spats with Ziggy's favourite girlie, Channelle.


Once the news had been broken, the househens busied themselves with the day to day comings and goings in the Big Chicken Eglu. With mirrors to be polished, glugs and grubs to be cleaned, and fresh paper for the old pot in the garden that the girls have been given while the nestbox is out of bounds, the day looked set to be one of those boring days where not much happened. By midday all the chores around the Eglu had been done, so the househens looked for other ways to entertain themselves. One half of the 'twintastic' Leghorns, Sam decided that she need to get a bit of excercise, and before long most of the househens were rearranging the Eglu run to build an obstacle course with netting to crawl under, glugs to jump over and all manner of improvised obstacles made for an exhausting circuit.


Sadly, Blue Cochine Emily, found herself bored very quickly with the obstacle race, and found a completely different way to spend her afternoon. Realising that the attentions of all the other househens were completely absobed in the obstacle fun, Emily sneaked into the old pot in the garden, and set about eating all the eggs that had been layed by her fellow househens. It is a fundamental rule of Big Chicken that all househens must pay their way while in the Big Chicken Eglu, by laying at least 4 eggs a week, and that househens must in no way disturb the laying pattern of their fellow househens. By eating the eggs, Emily had broken this rule, and in the early hours of the morning, after Big Chicken had consulted top lawyers, Eggemol and OfCCom (Office of Chicken Communications), it was decided that the Cochine should be removed immediately from the Big Chicken Eglu.


In light of Emily's removal, Friday nights eviction has been cancelled, leaving Shabnam in the house for at least another week.

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