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The Dogmother

Tips for dealing with telemarketers and other junk

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Just got sent this by a mate - great advice:


Some good ideas here....


Tips for Handling Telemarketers


Three Little Words That Work !

(1)The three little words are: "Hold On please..."


Saying this, while putting down your phone and walking off (instead of hanging-up immediately) would make each telemarketing call so much more time-consuming that boiler room sales would grind to a halt.


Then when you eventually hear the phone company's "beep-beep-beep" tone, you know it's time to go back and hang up your handset, which has efficiently completed its task.


These three little words will help eliminate telephone soliciting.



(2) Do you ever get those annoying phone calls with no one on the other end?


This is a telemarketing technique where a machine makes phone calls and records the time of day when a person answers the phone.


This technique is used to determine the best time of day for a "real" sales person to call back and get someone at home.


What you can do after answering, if you notice there is no one there, is to immediately start hitting your # button on the phone, 6 or 7 times, as quickly as possible This confuses the machine that dialed the call and it kicks your number out of their system. Gosh, what a shame not to have your name in their system any longer !!!


(3) Junk Mail Help:

When you get "ads" enclosed with your phone or utility bill, return these "ads" with your payment. Let the sending companies throw their own junk mail away.


When you get those "pre-approved" letters in the mail for everything from credit cards to 2nd mortgages and similar type junk, do not throw away the return envelope.


Most of these come with postage-paid return envelopes, right? It costs them more than the regular 24p postage "IF" and when they receive them back.


It costs them nothing if you throw them away! The postage was around 29p before the last increase and it is according to the weight. In that case, why not get rid of some of your other junk mail and put it in their postage-paid return envelopes.


For example; send an ad for your local chimney cleaner to American Express. Send a pizza coupon to Citibank. If you didn't get anything else that day, then just send them their blank application back!

If you want to remain anonymous, just make sure your name isn't on anything you send them. You can even send the envelope back empty if you want to just to keep them guessing! It still costs them 24p.


The banks and credit card companies are currently getting a lot of their own junk back in the mail, but folks, we need to OVERWHELM them. Let's let them know what it's like to get lots of junk mail, and best of all they're paying for it...Twice!


Let's help keep our postal service busy since they are saying that e-mail is cutting into their business profits, and that's why they need to increase postage costs again. You get the idea ?


If enough people follow these tips, it will work !



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I do return all the loan offers etc in the reply paid envelope already, never thought of sending them the pizza flyers etc too. I will definitely do that one now :D

I hate sales phone calls, but I do feel a little bit sorry for the poor folks making the calls. I can't imagine that they enjoy the job, but for them it's a way of earning money, so I always end up being polite through gritted teeth. I might try the hold on trick, if I can get over being so soft :roll:

I'll be using the # key trick for sure though.

Thanks for the tips- very useful advice :D

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Love it,love it, LOVE IT !!!!!



I have had a "no-one there" call nearly every evening this week all at the same time.

And I am already registered with those companies to stop cold callers :?


One thing I would say is personally I prefer to just recycle all the junk mail,then I know that it has been useful in some way.


But, I do love the idea of bomarding The Readers Bloomin Digest with all the trash I get (& we get a LOT, running a business from home double it!)


They might even win a cruise :D

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8) That's made my day, Clare, some great ideas, I'm starting the 1st one straight away.

Oh, trouble is, sometimes you have to answer or ask a couple of things to make sure its not an invited or genuine call, esp. if you work from home at all!

I've always tried to be polite yet brief on the phone, after all, its just someone the other end getting paid a pittance because they couldn't get a better job, they're still human.

But, last week, after a monetary enquiry, I said the usual "Sorry, that's not something I discuss on the phone/ not interested, thank you," the person phoned back & called me a TW*T (and it wasn't twit) for not hearing him out on the whole spiel! It really upset me, I'd said it in a pleasant but brief voice, not at all rude, just not wasting his time on the call. Of course, I have nowhere to complain about the abuse. Imagine what he'd phone back with if I'd left him on hold! :cry: Esp. annoying as I'm on telephone preference anyway. :roll: So, now I feel :evil::twisted:

An answermachine filters out a few, but I don't like family having to have it on all the time.

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Sheila,thats really nasty,for that person to speak to you in that way.

I hope the call was recorded his end,& he gets sounded out for it!


I must admit to feeling sorry for the people hawking catalogues & surveys on the cold wet Reading streets, but I very rarely answer even their questions,unless I am in a particularly good mood.


Which,when Christmas shopping in Reading,is not that often :lol:


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Gosh, how ahead of the times we are! My DH has just forwarded to me the original posting from Claret which is now circulating his office!


So I have searched for this thread and just thought I'd bring it to the front of people's minds again.


Today, I particularly love the idea of using pre-paid envelopes to send junk mail (without my address) back to companies. :D:twisted::D Not only will they have to pay 31p postage, but also they will be paying for someone to open the envelope. I mustn't make them too fat!


Ooh! So much pleasure . . . :D:D:D

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I must admit I don't get the annoying phone calls as I am signed up to BT privacy, you also get free caller display with it as well, so if you don't recognise the number, don't answer! I also don't have broadband which means when the computer is on no one can call anyway :D


I don't open addressed junk mail if I can identify the sender, I just circle the 'if undelivered please return to...' on the back and pop it in the nearest post box, and scribble 'not at this address' on the front, got rid of Capital One that way :D

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Forgot to add to my last post about callers at the door. If they are selling double glazing or any other property enhancing product, tell them you rent the place, and if they are trying to get you to switch energy suppliers, tell them you switched a couple of hours ago to their very company! Saves having them at the door for an hour :D

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I must add this posting (shamelessly cut and pasted from another forum), about a cold call from Loans Assured, as it's so appropriate to this topic...


Phone rings...probably another cold call....


Me: hallo

Eastern Male: is Mrs Mash there?

Me: (outraged hubby) Why, who is this? This is Mr Marsh speaking.

Male: Mr Mash, this is Rick from Loan a Shird (his pronunciation, not my poor spelling)

Me: Rick from where?

Rick: Loan a Shird

Me: why would my wife want to loan a shirt?

Rick: Loan a Shird

Me: My wife doesn't wear shirts, and if she did, she certainly wouldn't need to loan one. How would that work, logistically?

Rick: Thank you for your time, Sir.



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