The Dogmother Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 This article by Allison Pearson had me in hysterics - so cleverly written and true: Allsopp's Fable I loved Kirstie Allsopp on Location, Location, Location. I admired her gale-force cheeriness. I adored her print dresses and her warm good sense. Kirstie had a proper bust, which is what upper-class gels have instead of boobs. She combined being rarely rarely posh with being fraightfully practical. She was the love child of Nigella and Alan Titchmarsh. But now we have her new series, Kirstie's Homemade Home, and suddenly I want to use her to stuff a Chesterfield sofa. In this Channel 4 show Kirstie, whose partner is a property multimillionaire - now why didn't I get one of those? - shows us grateful plebs how to survive the recession by doing up a dilapidated cottage. It doesn't seem to have occurred to the Honourable Kirstie that most of us haven't got time to blow our own wine glasses or crossstitch the bedroom wallpaper, what with trying to keep the bailiffs from the door. What next from Kirstie Antoinette? How about a series called Repossession, Repossession, Repossession? Imagine the top tips: Kirstie shows you how to weave together all your unpaid bills to make a charming gazebo; Kirstie demonstrates how to reconnect your electricity using just a pair of fishnet stockings and an Alice band; Kirstie shows you how to keep warm by rubbing together two copies of Tatler. . . I was laughing so much that I had trouble eating my lunch! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chelsea Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 LOL ! great article. I would love to stuff her in a Chesterfield! I loved her kitchen in last weeks show......but did you see her parents palatial manor?! She lives up in the hills not too far from here....might drive round and have a nose one day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chickencam Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cinnamon Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 Clare, I read the same thing while eating my lunch in the garden just now too Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jlo Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 Is this the same Alison Pearson who wrote an hilarious novel called, "I don't know how she does it."? - a book that I recommend to all (sorry chaps!) women who try and do far too much. It starts off with the main character having to take in mince pies to child's school for a Nativity Play and she has bought ones that she is bashing with a rolling pin and covering with icing sugar to make them look home made. Somehow - I just related to this (See other thread about having a confession to make!! ) Great write up! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted April 22, 2009 Author Share Posted April 22, 2009 Clare, I read the same thing while eating my lunch in the garden just now too I was outside too, enjoying the sunshine Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted April 22, 2009 Author Share Posted April 22, 2009 Is this the same Alison Pearson who wrote an hilarious novel called, "I don't know how she does it."? - a book that I recommend to all (sorry chaps!) women who try and do far too much. It starts off with the main character having to take in mince pies to child's school for a Nativity Play and she has bought ones that she is bashing with a rolling pin and covering with icing sugar to make them look home made. Somehow - I just related to this (See other thread about having a confession to make!! ) Great write up! That sounds like a good read jlo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aunty e Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 I wanted so much to enjoy this show, but I was really disappointed - I thought she was going to actually do the renovations herself, rather than get in her frightfully clever builders. And she took a wall out of that cottage to make the enormous kitchen - I could see where the front parlour used to be. I thought there was a lot of repeated footage too, every ad break seemed to be preceeded by a five minute preview of the section after the break. And her cushion sucked. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted April 22, 2009 Author Share Posted April 22, 2009 I didn't see it, but I find her really condescending. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aunty e Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 I got rather on my DIY/crafting high horse and she was very condescending. Especially when talking to market traders. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chelsea Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 me & OH couldnt stop laughing at her in her landrover, thought she looked throughly stupid driving around London in it. And of course we all drive landrovers in the country. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Omletina Kyckling Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 I thought it was hilarious how she's pushing the idea of saving money by buying chairs on the market stall, making her own cushions etc, when she will have paid builders a fortune to do the actual renovation work and then she installs the biggest Aga I've ever seen in my life (I've seen smaller kitchens than that!)- so Omleteers, by making your own cushions, you too can afford a 26 oven Aga! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted April 22, 2009 Author Share Posted April 22, 2009 Makes me spit, Diane! I furtle around reclaimation places and car boots for stuff to renovate and she goes and gets a blooming Aga Easy when you've got the cash I guess! Oh well, at least us lot can sleep easy in the knowledge that we know how to be thrifty! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egluntyne Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 This article by Allison Pearson had me in hysterics - so cleverly written and true: Allsopp's Fable I loved Kirstie Allsopp on Location, Location, Location. I admired her gale-force cheeriness. I adored her print dresses and her warm good sense. Kirstie had a proper bust, which is what upper-class gels have instead of boobs. She combined being rarely rarely posh with being fraightfully practical. She was the love child of Nigella and Alan Titchmarsh. But now we have her new series, Kirstie's Homemade Home, and suddenly I want to use her to stuff a Chesterfield sofa. In this Channel 4 show Kirstie, whose partner is a property multimillionaire - now why didn't I get one of those? - shows us grateful plebs how to survive the recession by doing up a dilapidated cottage. It doesn't seem to have occurred to the Honourable Kirstie that most of us haven't got time to blow our own wine glasses or crossstitch the bedroom wallpaper, what with trying to keep the bailiffs from the door. What next from Kirstie Antoinette? How about a series called Repossession, Repossession, Repossession? Imagine the top tips: Kirstie shows you how to weave together all your unpaid bills to make a charming gazebo; Kirstie demonstrates how to reconnect your electricity using just a pair of fishnet stockings and an Alice band; Kirstie shows you how to keep warm by rubbing together two copies of Tatler. . . I was laughing so much that I had trouble eating my lunch! Very witty isn't it. Good old Daily Mail. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Speckled Hen Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 Very funny article. I remember she used to totter around in a pair of Christian Louboutins till she seemed to be pregnant for ages. She's on record as saying that second homes are good for the locals as their owners spend money at the local pubs and shops. Different planet really Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted April 22, 2009 Author Share Posted April 22, 2009 Yeah, Planet Bunting Cupcake! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Speckled Hen Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 Yeah, Planet Bunting Cupcake! I lurked over that thread with ever increasing incredulity Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clootie Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 Yeah, Planet Bunting Cupcake! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aunty e Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 Wretched woman. When I finally buy my dilapidated ruin to do up (fingers crossed it may not be long now - Duncan call me back and tell me what the estate agent said!!!!!!), my idea of doing it on a budget involves doing as much of the renovation as I can myself - hugely pregnant, or with newborn in tow, and buying stuff in reclamation yards and on ebay. Not tootling around markets in an enormous landrover paying far too much for horrid ercol chairs. Or buying brand new six oven agas. I should point out at this juncture that I have a shed full of wooden doors, cast iron fireplaces and arts and craft chairs rescued from skips. Now, for a house to put them in.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted April 22, 2009 Author Share Posted April 22, 2009 Ahhh, a fellow skip diver! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seagazer Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 I must admit I had a laugh at this article in the paper today as well. I was hugely disappointed by the show. It rather skipped over the actual craft bits and really how many of us could afford to pay for lessons in everything? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charlottechicken Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 Hee hee, brilliant article! Yes her cushion did suck, big time! (I made better ones years ago, out of a large 2nd hand purple jumper, and they are still going strong ) Trouble is, she's making thrift fashionable, I'm not sure I want to be fashionable I will be watching it again though, purely for the comedy factor Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yorkshire Pudding Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 We watched the first episode and we won't be watching any more. I could cheerfully have strangled her by about five minutes after the start and OH's male 'shouting at the telly' gene was expressing itself loudly ! I could make a better cushion than that and I am PANTS at sewing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisnrob Posted April 22, 2009 Share Posted April 22, 2009 I thought there was a lot of repeated footage too, every ad break seemed to be preceeded by a five minute preview of the section after the break. This type of thing *really* annoys me about TV today. For example, on "Location, Location, Location" when you return after an ad-break you get Phil or Kirstie saying "This week we're helping the Smith family who want to move from their luxury mansion in Mayfair to a crofter's cottage in the Hebrides." I want to shout back at them "Yes, I know - it's only been five minutes since you last told us!" Why are we not credited with remembering anything that happened before the ad-break...? Rob Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lesley Posted April 23, 2009 Share Posted April 23, 2009 I didn't realise it had started - no doubt I would feel the same as you all seem to though Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
