Poorly chicken

[Valkyrie]

It's because pesky chickens are always up to no good.

[Margaret]

Hoorah...Grumpy chickens are back

[brambles]

Who's a grumpy chicken? Even I know that I am a feathered pancake.

Bluebelle x

[Valkyrie]

Hi girls, Apache here. I don't like it when it's hot and I don't like flies. My feathers are falling out everywhere and it's really hard to look your best when your boobs are beginning to show. Sioux has been eyeing me up because she would like to take over my position. Not when you only have one stupid tail feather that looks like a flagpole. The others pretty much keep their distance, although I really hate Squirt puffing up and squawking like she's auditioning for "Pirates of the Caribbean". As for the black pancake, I just sit on top of her. My hooman is stupid too - she thinks I'm asking to be cooled down because she keeps squirting water at me - I keep telling her I WANT GRAPES AND MEALWORMS. So she's standing by the weird thing and hanging her feathers up on it. The hoomans do seem to have lots of pretty coloured feathers, but ours are nicer. Anyways I go up and say GRAPES. She tells me to be quiet. So I ask again GRAPESGRAPESGRAPESGRAPESGRAPES! And she squirts me - you'd think she'd know by this time.

[brambles]

Apache, I don't think she can hear you. Shout louder, enlist the help of the other girls and all shout at once. That should do it.

[docsquid]

Apache, I don't think she can hear you. Shout louder, enlist the help of the other girls and all shout at once. That should do it.

 

Apache, Blodwyn here. Yes, shout louder! It is particularly effective when all your sisters join in at 6.30 in the morning. For some reason they respond very quickly at that time of day. There is no figuring out these hoomans.

 

I am slightly concerned about our hoopeople, as they keep mentioning a Walk-in-Run. We don't understand this. We have a run that we can walk into already! We are waiting to see what this is going to mean. Maybe the hoomans will go into a run and we'll be outside - that must be it! About time - they need to learn how to behave. See how they like chicken pellets when there are lovely runner beans, tomatoes, garlic, herbs and blueberries to be eaten if only they'd take down that fence!

 

Yours all sisterly-like

Blodwyn

[Chicken Mad]

Anyways I go up and say GRAPES. She tells me to be quiet. So I ask again GRAPESGRAPESGRAPESGRAPESGRAPES! And she squirts me - you'd think she'd know by this time.

 

I think we should start shouting alongside with you. We have not had any grapes for at least five days!!!

Though she did chop some cucumber for us each day and there are these rather tasty little white and red berries on the other side of the fence. Also heard talk of black ones being available later in the season! When ever we let out (or more like spot the opportunity to escape) we bee line for them. He-hooman is very annoying as he keeps pushing us away from them. It's very silly really, he's not picking them and the dam black birds are constantly at them when the hoomans aren't looking!

 

Cluck with you later Ladies (and any Gents online!),

Gladys and sisters,

[brambles]

Well ladies, I'm speaking from under the cube. Shhhhh. we have been invaded by aliens. Or Dr Who. This big silver spaceship has arrived in our run and herself is pouring our food in it. We're not sure, because we've all heard about probes and what goes on in spaceships. She's put a brick over the entrance ramp and we think there's some sort of food inside. If she honestly thinks we're going near it, she's another thing coming.

 

Oh. Hang on. Garvo? Snoopy henny hen mix on the spaceship ramp - *run!!!!!~!*

[Space Chick]

Ahhh, we had one of those big silver spaceships arrive in our run too. You will learn over time that in the summer months if you jump on and off it at 5 o'clock in the morning when the people have their windows open that you can sometimes wake them up!! Hoorah.

 

Well ladies, I have to share that when we woke up this morning, we found that there were 3 new girls living in the downstairs of part of the run at the end They must have been smuggled in under cover of darkness. Two of them are very odd looking with these feathers the likes of which we have never seen before. The third looks a bit like our sister Big Suze who died. We are going to keep eyeing them with caution of the time being.

 

Although the human female said that she bought us lots of presents at this big chicken show, so we are looking forward to them, although we are now feeling slightly annoyed that she went to a show without us.... Which had boys there and everything!!! In fact she said that her friends boy won the best looking bantam boy competition and won a cup with 3 handles. I can't believe she knows these hot men and has never introduced us. Hmmmph!!!

 

Bye for now the Cimla girls xxx

[gongladosh]

I'm sure I saw one of mine dressed as Batman, trying to hide a "hens for justice" banner the other day...

[House MD 221B]

lol that's lovely our little bantam Angua likes to go broody, I think she's only laid us around 10 or 12 eggs, the rest of the time she goes broody, we break her out of it within a week or 2, and then she won't lay for months on end

[brambles]

I am in love with Steven, for this is his name written on him. He is full of food and has tasty treats scattered on his feet. The hoo woman was jumping with joy. Maybe she loves him. I will deal with this by doing stealth poo on his lid, then he will be all mine for she will be ew Ed out by this.

[Chicken Mad]

Hey Ladies,

 

Be proud of me! My shehooman picked me up, I wresled with her and climbed on her shoulder (as per usual!). Then well aimed watery poop right down her! Hehooman saw it and aproved!! That was couple of months ago. She did not pick me up much after that and picked my sisters instead, they don't wresle with her just sit in her arms!

 

Kind regards,

Mabel

[Lavenders_Blue]

Mabel - you are a hen after my own heart!

Bella and I both like to climb onto our chambermaid's knee when we get the chance. To tell you the truth, Bella is a bit of a goody two shoes and settles down for a snooze...B*O*R*I*N*G! My way is much more fun, I stand up there for a bit, pretending to be all sweet and cuddly, then all of a sudden, when the maid least expects it, I deliver a big splatty poo! It really is fun to see whether or not she can dodge it in time.

Do you have any other tricks you could share with me?

Lots of love and mischief,

Dorothy x

[Valkyrie]

Yo Dudes, Tipsy here. My hooman gets fed up with me. I never like going back in our run for tea and have devised ways of dodging round all the trees and bushes so she can't get in. Sometimes it's even better because everyone else comes out (they might think they are better than me but they are so stupid that they think I'm being given treats hahaha) and then the hooman has to chase everyone indoors. Just lately I managed to persuade my friend Sadie - I say friend, she can be mean to me sometimes even if she is short - to stay out with me. Then we can both run in different directions. She has persuaded Mini to join us. Mini is short like her and looks like those hedgehog things that I'm frightened of. The other day the hooman made the run longer and it was sooooo far to get back into our house for the night that we just stood around the door with our tea once she'd got us all in of course. Then that nasty cold white stuff came back. We don't like that, so when she came out with our tea she couldn't see me. She looked everywhere round the garden calling us and grumping - I have to say Mini was with me inside the cube. Hooman looked so stupid and there we were in the warm. I could see her from the little gap. She found us eventually but she was sneaky - she opened up the door where the furball lays eggs and I like to sleep with Skye - and she grabbed my bottom. Hmmph!

The most annoying thing is that she has started opening up that little door at night and shoving us out of that comfy little hole back into the big hole with the rest of the fat stupid bossy mares. Sioux is mean and so is Apache. As for Sadie, you'd think she'd be my friend by now. Hmmph!