Pro - Does anyone else's nest boxes get soaked in rain?

[welovemarmite]

is it me or has the spirit really gone out of xmas.

THe families send round lists of specific items that they want and sometimes even links to specfic items on the internet - even ebay. What happened to choosing presents for people (ok maybe getting a few clues for sort of things).

 

Its got to the stage where you might as well say don't buy presents and go and spend that money on yourself instead. Me and hubbie are rebelling this year and the only people we are buying for off lists are children and everyone else will get a gift we have chosen for them.

 

Am I truly becoming grumpy??

[Space Chick]

I like having lists, at least then you know you are getting the person something that they will really like

 

My MIL always buys us stuff we don't like, and as much as we appreciate the thought, it usually ends up in the charity shop which makes me feel bad, but I'd rather that someone else gets the benefit.

[Charlottechicken]

Hmm.

 

If the items people are asking for are within your price range then I suppose you know that they will truly appreciate the gift and will use it

[bluekarin]

I do understand what you are saying, but the amount of Christmases when I was young when I just didn't get the very thing I really wanted I sort of understand why people are so specific.But it does spoil the fun and surprise of Christmas. I think it's a much better idea to sort of know what someone is after ie a blue jug, and popping a gift receipt in with it. Then, if they really don't like it, or it doesn't go with their other things, they can then take it back.

 

It also solves the duplicate pressies scenario. One year I got two watches; one digital and one analogue, and two cameras

[Laura & CTB]

Sometimes I'll ask family members for a list of what they'd like then I choose one or two items from that if I'm really stuck for ideas but no one in my family or friends would send me a list without being asked for it first.

[welovemarmite]

i don't mind clues and hints. But when it gets to being emailed a list, pressing a button to by the item and being hassled to send the list on with your gift deducted pretty swiftly afterwards it just loses all the spirit of things.

 

I tend to 'take notes' throughout the year of what people are saying, liking etc and then base the present around those. If i get stuck then i will ask their partner for some hints. I still like the recipient to have some sort of surprise...

 

THe brest presents I have had have all been surprises..

 

should i change my name to 'Victoria Meldrew'

[BeckyBoo]

I always ask, because sometimes someone will say "oooh, I really REALLY want......" whatever it is that they can't justify spending out on themselves. Children I normally ask because disappointment at such a hugely anticipated time can be SO hard for a child and I love seeing their faces when they get something they really really like. I'm easy, so is my Mum, we're both of the "it's the thought that counts" frame of mind. Doesn't matter if it cost 20p from a charity shop or it's my favourite perfume that I normally get off someone once a year, if someone saw it and thought kindly of me, then I will love it. (even if it's the TRULY AWFUL earrings ED bought me for my birthday, even Bet Lynch would have blushed Bless her she really loved them, I've forced myself to wear them once, luckily I have lots of long hair to hide them!!

 

Everyone else I ask for a list of stuff, and if I can't find something myself then I hit the list!

 

BeckyBoo

[WarrensWorld]

 

[welovemarmite]

love it warrens world.............

[Alis girls]

OH and I get together each New year with 4 other couples and compare what the grandparents and outlaws got us for Xmas. My dad comes out on top as he gives us money : One friends MIL recyles stuff out of her house for friend and her kids. Another friend had a cake slice off her mum and she doesnt bake. usually after a few bottles of plonk a cake slice is seen as hilarious. I do agree its all consumerism gone mad.

[Lewis]

I know what you mean, I don't have anything I really want this year so find it hard when people ask, I think its a bit rude to ask for money but if its offered I'll ask to have it to put towards a car (if I get one ).

 

Last year I wanted a few little things so it was easy to think of things, but some were things I'd seen online so told people about websites.

[Valkyrie]

People always ask what I want - but I can never remember until it's too late. We will get something that is on a list for the children (hah, big children) and some things will be surprises and silly things that they look forward too, like the bag of choccy coins. OH is hopeless with regard to imagination - if it's in a garden centre then I must want it. No more watering cans for birthdays or Christmasses thank you. So now he isn't getting anything for me - I'll just get my own stuff. Yep, bah humbug from me. MMMMMM - humbugs!

[Seagazer]

It is a tricky one isn't it as you don't want to buy something that the person isn't going to like but it does take the surprise out of the gift.

 

I usually ask general questions about what the child is into at the time and then try and find something. My nephew started to tell me last week what he wanted but I had to tell him I'd already got the presents. I just hit the shops and the internet and got on with it this year.

 

My DD loves to have surprises whereas ES would much rather have things that he would have put on a list. YS is just happy to get a present!

[Cooks]

I like lists, but I wouldn't like the link to the item and the asking to send back business, blimey....

[Olly]

I was shocked at that one, too!

 

We do lists in my family, and always have done. I would much rather get someone what they want, than a random present that they don't want - the list is a general indicator, and "Ooops, word censored!"ody expects to get everything on it. I will buy a main present off the list, and we don't spend a lot in my family because there are so many of us, and then get some small surprises.

 

I'm not very good at choosing things for other people, and I'd far rather get something knowing it will be wanted. If I'm not sure, I get consumables (bath, food, drink) - so much waste is generated at Christmas.

[Happy-Mama]

I'm the same I like to know what people want (I find it awful when I don't have a clue what to get someone) but the emailed list and passing on thing sounds a bit extreme. Get around the surprises for kids thing by getting them to write a list to Santa then have a look at what they write before it gets sent.

[Busybird]

Present giving is a tough one when money is an issue.

 

I have asked all my friends if we can just exchange cards this year. I have also asked my sister and SIL if we can forgoe buying presents for each others children (the past few years we have just sent money so I have sent each of their children £10 and they have sent each of mine £10 - that seems just silly). We don't buy the adults anything anyway.

 

My mum always sends us money which is very welcome. That just left my in laws. In October I broached the idea of only buying the children presents or giving them money. They were not receptive to the idea. So, when they asked for ideas, I sent them internet links to exact items. If they buy these for the children then we don't have to, so save real money. I have asked them not to buy anything for OH and I - but if they must then to make it consumables (wine or something for the Christmas table).

 

It may take the joy out of present giving for the giver but it gives my kids what they want and we 'do' Christmas mainly for the kids. They have been great about making this a 'budget' Christmas.

 

I have bought OH a few small things and asked him not to do more than that for me. Christmas will still cost far too much but hopefully what is exchanged will be used and the kids will not be disappointed.

 

We are far from poor but this year has been tougher economically than we are used to and I don't believe in spending more than is coming in. I don't think my in laws understand that this is an issue and I would not wish to say anything to them if OH hasn't.

[docsquid]

We prefer to buy one or two larger gifts for both of us together - this year has been exceptional* thanks to the money from my Mum's estate being used to replace things that really needed replacing. On a normal year we still usually buy something large, or go on a ski holiday.

 

DH is very difficult to buy anything for. He likes tools but is picky about exactly which one. I usually end up buying polo shirts after pointing out the ones he is wearing have holes in them (he doesn't seem to notice). This year santa paws and santa chicken have bought him a few things that are secret He is quite clever at getting me things - last year I didn't get anything because we were skiing, but the year before I had a set of wood-turning tools (that I actually wanted!).

 

I never know what to ask for, and if people ask I simply can't think or can't remember what I had thought of. I prefer something like an iTunes voucher that I can redeem for something nice, or some plants or trees.

 

The family get charity presents as they really don't want or need anything, and I'd rather see money going to people who do need and can really benefit from the present. I top this up with some hand-made presents that are a bit more personal.