abwsco Posted October 1, 2010 Author Share Posted October 1, 2010 Thanks again. It really does help us. Still not heard from the Matron of the nursing home. I'm sure I was told that she would be contacting me. At least Dad's had some water today. He's being a stubborn so and so though. He's told me he can't hear me and then told me off for shouting. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daphne Posted October 1, 2010 Share Posted October 1, 2010 I'm very sorry to hear about your father. I'd call the matron - time could be of the essence. We have found with 4 family members over a period of years that a strong advocate is needed from the family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abwsco Posted October 1, 2010 Author Share Posted October 1, 2010 Thanks Daphne. The hopsice nurse rang within minutes of me having done that update to tell me she knew Dad was going to the home tomorrow. Told her we didn't know anything and she got the Sister on Duty at the home to ring me to confirm. He's going in some time tomorrow but no transport had been arranged They're trying to sort that out now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarkBevBen Posted October 2, 2010 Share Posted October 2, 2010 Hi Anne, just wanted to say you're all in my thoughts and hope the move to the nursing home goes well today. I'm a nurse, but a paediatric nurse so only care for children aged 0-16/17. On of my best friends is a Sister in a hospice xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abwsco Posted October 2, 2010 Author Share Posted October 2, 2010 Thank you. He's going in about an hour DH will have to carry him downstairs as no-one else can do it. I am just so grateful that everything has been sorted out quickly and that battling with SS isn't a regular occurrence for us. How people cope when it is I don't know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abwsco Posted October 2, 2010 Author Share Posted October 2, 2010 Well he's in and settled. Home and staff seem lovely. He was complaining at having to be washed and the horror of a bath tomorrow so he's still got some fight in him Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daphne Posted October 2, 2010 Share Posted October 2, 2010 Pleased to hear that Anne As you say, being annoyed is a good sign! Its a huge weight off the mind when the care works out isn't it. Do try to take some time for yourself, doing whatever relaxes; its going to be draining for you. Y Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charlottechicken Posted October 2, 2010 Share Posted October 2, 2010 So sorry to read about your dad. I hope he now gets the care he needs. Please take care of yourself as well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poachedegg Posted October 2, 2010 Share Posted October 2, 2010 Glad you managed to sort out your Dad's care without too much problem - take care xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sheilaz Posted October 2, 2010 Share Posted October 2, 2010 Anne, I think you've been marvellous, I don't know how some people manage if there is "Ooops, word censored!"ody to speak up for them. Hard times ahead, but your Father will now receive proper care, well done for making these arrangements. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Purplemaniacs Posted October 3, 2010 Share Posted October 3, 2010 Glad to hear that your Dad has settled. I hope he gets the care that he needs. Chrissie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chucky Mama Posted October 3, 2010 Share Posted October 3, 2010 That really is good news Anne. Well done, thinking of you at this stressful time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sari Posted October 3, 2010 Share Posted October 3, 2010 Adding you to my positive thoughts list, if thats ok....not a christian, so don't pray. I worked on a Palliative Care ward, and hope Dad, and you get the support you need. I loved my time on the PC ward, and have some good memories of the lovely ladies and gentlemen I cared for. I cannot add anything to the above posts, but hope your Dad gets the care he requires, and hope you get the support too. Sari x x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egluntyne Posted October 3, 2010 Share Posted October 3, 2010 Thinking of you. xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Olly Posted October 3, 2010 Share Posted October 3, 2010 So glad to hear your Dad is now getting the care he deserves, and it will be easier for you at what is inevitably going to be a very hard time. Do look after yourself, you will need all your resources so make sure you are eating well and having some time out. I'm sad to hear that things are no better (and probably not likely to get better with impending cuts in funding ) than they were seven years ago when my family went through all this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plum Posted October 3, 2010 Share Posted October 3, 2010 Sorry to hear of your troubles and hope that your dad gets the care and support he needs now. xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abwsco Posted October 3, 2010 Author Share Posted October 3, 2010 Wasn't sure whether to post this but my stress levels have gone through the roof. Been to see him this morning and since yesterday afternoon he's been getting up and out of the bed easily to get to the comode, took himself off for a walk been drinking and taken his meds. All of this was impossible at ours. They also found him alseep on the floor with his pillow on one check as he'd decided this was more comfy than the bed. Am worried sick now that there is going to be some comeback on the hospice nurse that assessed him as needing emergency respite care and got us the funding. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plum Posted October 3, 2010 Share Posted October 3, 2010 No, it just means you have done the right thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daphne Posted October 3, 2010 Share Posted October 3, 2010 Dear Anne - Plum is right; you've obviously helped him loads Please don't expend extra energies worrying about another person unless you can solve the worry, you won't get any resolution and it will just eat at you. You need to try to keep your energies for your family. I'm sure the hospice nurse is experienced, the rest of the staff certainly will be and I bet this isn't the first time this has happened! When we looked after him, my FIL (who didn't have cancer) was the very devil with his own daughter, taking to his bed and refusing to do anything (and I mean anything), much better behaved with me, and sweetness and light and unbelievably lucid with medical professionals; my own father when in terminal stages of cancer and in hospital was also much perkier around medical staff. In both case they behaved differently to what they had been like at home. Kind thoughts are with you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abwsco Posted October 3, 2010 Author Share Posted October 3, 2010 Thank you both loads I feel so much calmer after reading your replies. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ain't Nobody Here Posted October 3, 2010 Share Posted October 3, 2010 So sorry to hear about the difficult time you've been having . It sounds like he's doing well there so I'm sure you did the right thing . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abwsco Posted October 5, 2010 Author Share Posted October 5, 2010 My daddy has died tonight He'd deteriotated rapidly today but it still wasn't expected so I wasn't with him. He was painfree and asleep. Feeling very numb. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bronze Posted October 5, 2010 Share Posted October 5, 2010 I'm so sorry I'm glad he went pain free Look after yourself xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chucky Mama Posted October 5, 2010 Share Posted October 5, 2010 Oh you poor thing. I am so sorry to hear your news. He is a peace now. How lovely to have had such a loving, caring daughter in his life. Take care. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pipichick Posted October 5, 2010 Share Posted October 5, 2010 I am so very sorry to read of your loss, I know it is little comfort, but now your dad is free from the pain and at rest. My thoughts are with you and your family x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...