Sheilaz Posted October 4, 2011 Share Posted October 4, 2011 People use Facebook in different ways, and I joined thinking it may be useful, my daughters use it all the time and it works well for them. However, I've decided it's really not for me, other than as a link to people who know me well. So, I've decided to downsize my list of friends there, for no other reason than to simplify my use of it. I'm posting to emphasize that "Ooops, word censored!"ody has offended me, so please don't be upset if I've deleted you, it isn't that anyone has done anything wrong, and I still like you all! I realised this week that I love the forum, and have some great friends here, but can just scroll past anything I don't want to read because it's an open forum and I'd expect to need to skip parts. Facebook feels closer and more personal, but I found myself reading things that friends would not say in front of me, and far more of other people's chat than I ever intended, it's just not for me. But as I say, I'm not dropping anyone, just downsizing on Facebook. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yvonne Posted October 4, 2011 Share Posted October 4, 2011 I've been thinking of doing the same myself, good for you. I'm amazed about the trivial and on the other hand personal nature of the comments some people post there - useful for tracking down old friends, but otherwise a bit too intrusive for me too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cinnamon Posted October 4, 2011 Share Posted October 4, 2011 I did the same myself a few months ago,losing some virtual friends,but keeping those who I actually know or who I interact with regularly. I have had a couple of comments,but there you go. Its easy for Facebook to become a 'people I have spoken to once in my life' list, & I wanted it to be a bit more personal than that Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted October 4, 2011 Share Posted October 4, 2011 I don't blame you Sheila and Sarah; never seen the point of it myself Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cinnamon Posted October 4, 2011 Share Posted October 4, 2011 Don't get me wrong....I LOVE Facebook & spend time on there every day. But it got a bit out of hand & needed controlling (a bit like the dog!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snowberry Posted October 4, 2011 Share Posted October 4, 2011 Now that all the settings haved changed on there, I am getting friends posts on THEIR friends posts. A friend said she knew every post of mine even though my settings are to friends only. It's become so complicated & I may be downsizing too Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lizinsa Posted October 4, 2011 Share Posted October 4, 2011 It is quite how much you can find out about people and vice versa. My 'rule' is that if I passed you in the street and would stop to say a 'hello and how are you?' then I'm friends on fb if not then I don't accept the friend request. It's my friends 30th in a few weeks and we've used fb to get lots of photos of her but it really is quite scary that I can download pictures from her life and store them on my computer forever more! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
squiffs Posted October 4, 2011 Share Posted October 4, 2011 I don't blame you, since these new settings have come in and I can see private conversations between my friends and their friends I've never met in a bitesize ticker newsfeed, I have to wonder if it's worth it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snowberry Posted October 4, 2011 Share Posted October 4, 2011 If I've changed all my setting to friends only then what am I doing wrong for all my friends to see conversations I'm having with other people? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sam Posted October 4, 2011 Share Posted October 4, 2011 I downsized a while back, I read through posts of people that tbh I would never speak to so whats the point of having them as friends on fb. I then hid my friends. Really annoys me when people have hundreds/thousands of friends when clearly they don't know half of them! And yes, the mini facebook in the corner annoys me too, what's the point of it?! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
squiffs Posted October 4, 2011 Share Posted October 4, 2011 I posted this status a while ago, I suggest anyone who has the 'ticker privacy issue' does the same! "To ALL of my FB friends: please hover over my name here, wait for the box to load and then hover over the "Subscribe" link. Then uncheck the "Comments and likes" choice. Then 'Like' this status. I would rather my comments on friends' posts not be made public. Then repost if you don't want your EVERY MOVE posted on the right for everyone to see! When the Likes are there, you can just go down the line, no need to go to each site and do it from your page. I'm doing this for everyone that shows up on my news feed! Please do this for me! Thanks!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
squiffs Posted October 4, 2011 Share Posted October 4, 2011 If I've changed all my setting to friends only then what am I doing wrong for all my friends to see conversations I'm having with other people? Facebook has decided to make subscribing to friends' posts an 'opt out' policy - so you need to manually unsubscribe from someone else's feed yourself in order for their comments to stop coming up. Unless other people unsubscribe from your comments and likes, that will always be there for them. It's mindblowingly repulsive in terms of privacy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Angie Posted October 4, 2011 Share Posted October 4, 2011 I did the same a while back , a few posts were not always what i wanted to be faced with and it went on so i had a clean out so to speak ,even stopped the games, my smaller community of friends are real treasures and i love them all . I quite understand where you are coming from, it is a network but we are in charge of our little part of it and no one else will clean it up for you . The firends i kept when it is a tadge personal pm me and we also chat, much nicer this way . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seagazer Posted October 5, 2011 Share Posted October 5, 2011 Can I just ask a question? The message bit, that doesn't come through to everyone else does it? I've always thought that just goes between you and the person you've messaged (I hope this is true as I've told my mum that - she needed to 'talk' to someone privately). I must admit I don't understand much of what has changed etc on Fb. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cinnamon Posted October 5, 2011 Share Posted October 5, 2011 Messaging is personal - a bit like PM'ing on here. But if you write on someones wall,it could be put on that new & annoying sidebar feed. I think you can set it each time you wall post so that only the recipient sees it. Thats sidebar feed also now shows people who are on your friends lists wall posts to people on their lists,who may not be on yours (hope that makes sense?) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bramble Posted October 5, 2011 Share Posted October 5, 2011 Facebook scares me a bit. I do have a page (and have all of 9 friends on there - but they are all real FRIENDS who I'm genuinely keen to keep in touch with - though I don't need Facebook to do it) but my young nephew has just asked me to be his friend (and of course I said yes), he's only had a page for a week or so, but already he has more than 200 "friends". I know that there is no doubt pressure at school to have the most friends (anything less than 100 would obviously make him a social outcast ) but trying to explain to him that it's "quality not quantity" that counts with friends seems to go completely over his head. Very worrying Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seagazer Posted October 5, 2011 Share Posted October 5, 2011 Thanks Cinnamon - that's what I thought. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGirlsMum Posted October 5, 2011 Share Posted October 5, 2011 I knew there was a reason why I have avoided FB Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chucky Mama Posted October 5, 2011 Share Posted October 5, 2011 I have just seen that my brother in law is doing this. There is a sort of tick box thing asking if you want to stay friends, yes, no or don't care. He is the most boring Facebook friend as keeps posting mindless clips of bands. I would dearly love to say 'no' but I think that he would be mortally offended Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chickencam Posted October 5, 2011 Share Posted October 5, 2011 I have been doing a bit of trimming too, I am not sure that facebook is really for me. I will check in from time to time to see what my offspring are up to but apart from that I will stick with the forum. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Olly Posted October 5, 2011 Share Posted October 5, 2011 You've raised a good topic here, Sheila! I have only a few friends on FB, and I am very reluctant to add any more unless they are people I really know. I use it mainly to keep in touch with extended family, I love seeing what my niece at Uni has been up to (I'm honour bound not to tell her mum! ) and I get pictures of my great-niece and so on. We even had a private family group page, but haven't used it much lately. I do get fed up with constant clips of bands etc, and the banal 'Hurrah - it's Friday again' type of posts, but it is a great way to keep in touch with people whom you wouldn't necessarily phone or email frequently. I might 'drop' a few of my friends too - there's one in particular who uses extremely foul language, and I'm always worried he'll post something rude on my wall - I'm not easily offended but my friends might be. Love it or hate it, I think it's here to stay. I draw the line at Twitter though! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yvonne Posted October 5, 2011 Share Posted October 5, 2011 Twitter is FAB - you can follow genuinely witty people or topics that interest you rather than whether the bloke down the road has a new tractor on Farmville. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cinnamon Posted October 5, 2011 Share Posted October 5, 2011 I am afraid that I just don't get Twitter at all,& I have really tried with it Everyone says how great it is,but I just don't see the appeal,whereas Facebook works for me (maybe I don't understand Twitter,or am not using it properly?) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted October 5, 2011 Share Posted October 5, 2011 Another one that I really don't get either; I wouldn't bother Sarah. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egluntyne Posted October 5, 2011 Share Posted October 5, 2011 I don't get twitter at all, especially all this @ and # business. I use fb, mostly to keep in touch with far flung family, but am not keen on the recent changes. I don't blame you, Sheila, for 'downsizing'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
