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The Dogmother

The truth about getting older

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A friend sent these to me in an email today and I thought they'd bear sharing, especially as I identified with a couple of them!

 

1. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was

younger.

 

2. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

 

3. Nothing sucks more than the moment during an argument when you

realize you’re wrong.

 

4. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I’m pretty

sure I know how to get out of my neighbourhood.

 

5. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the

person died.

 

6. I can’t remember the last time I wasn’t at least kind of tired.

 

7. Bad decisions make good stories.

 

8. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work

when you know that you just aren’t going to do anything productive for

the rest of the day.

 

9. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I

don’t want to have to restart my collection…again.

 

10. I’m always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me

if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I

swear I did not make any changes to.

 

11. I keep some people’s phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to

answer when they call.

 

12. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

 

13. I wish Google Maps had an “Avoid Ghetto” routing option.

 

14. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and

hunger.

 

15. How many times is it appropriate to say “What?” before you just nod

and smile because you still didn’t hear or understand a word they said?

 

16. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up

to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers

and sisters!

 

17. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get

dirty, and you can wear them forever. (this is American, I think they mean 'trousers' :roll: )

 

18. Sometimes I’ll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still

not know what time it is.

 

19. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car

keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the

Donkey – but I’d bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3

feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.

 

20. People who forward e- mail without deleting the tons of previous

recipients should be shot and then tarred and feathered.

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I would also add a few more positives

 

I no longer care obsessively whether people like me - if they do, great, if they don't, also fine

 

If a book has not grabbed me after 50 pages or so then I don't soldier on till the end to get my money's worth !

 

And for us of the female kind (look away any males of a sensitive disposition) - no more periods :lol:

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I would also add a few more positives

 

I no longer care obsessively whether people like me - if they do, great, if they don't, also fine

 

If a book has not grabbed me after 50 pages or so then I don't soldier on till the end to get my money's worth !

 

And for us of the female kind (look away any males of a sensitive disposition) - no more periods :lol:

 

I'll second all of those, the book one applies to most things for me... if it isn't working for me then I try not to waste time on it.

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I would add the following....

 

All those things you saw your mother do and said you never would - you'll do most of them.

 

Reading glasses are your new best friends. Buy lots and leave them everywhere.

 

It's OK not to know or care what's in the charts - don't look, you won't have heard of 95% of them and this is depressing.

 

Growing a beard and moustache is normal - just because no-one tells you this or talks about it does not mean it's untrue.

 

Do not wear the high fashion thingy you saved from last time round - it will not look cool and vintage, it will look like 1970s/80s fancy dress.

 

Your feet get bigger. You will never get back into those shoes.

 

And my favourite quote "you don't stop playing because you get old; you get old because you stop playing" - so find time to do something daft/fun/silly on a regular basis!

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i have turned into my mum even though she drove me mad when I was young (sorry Mum RIP - wherever you are now you are having a good laugh) - a faddy 11 year old eater - ring any bells mum? Always saying remember to say thank you - I hate rude ill mannered people and get seriously hacked off.

Many of those ring true - home for the bewildered beckons and I'm only 51!!! :boohoo::boohoo::boohoo:

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