Goosey Lucy Posted December 5, 2007 Share Posted December 5, 2007 Basset said Last week I forwarded the clocks 15mins, and as usual they weren't ready when the clock showed 8.30am. So I told them they were going to school as they were and put their coats over their PJs, opened the front door and set off down the driveway!! I've never seen them move so fast in all their lives, they were absolutely terror-striken !!! They raced upstairs and where dressed and ready within 2mins. Hee hee hee Just goes to show what happens when you really do follow through on your threats. I'm quite lucky with my two but the bin bag has been threatened since they were about 3 years old. We also have too many toys but both boys now understand that Father Christmas doesn't bring toys to boys with untidy bedrooms or if toy cupboards are full to bursting. This weekend we are doing our annual 'What can we give away?' weekend. We recycle toys to friends, family and charity shops. Good luck with the Lego jar, my son's school uses a similar strategy to promote good behaviour with some of the classes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popcorn Posted December 5, 2007 Share Posted December 5, 2007 Well, I must say this thread has given me something to think about. I will definately be putting some of your ways into practiuse when Stefan is a little older. Mrs B, I do hope you are feeling a little brighter this morning. Tiredness is an awful thing to deal with on it's own, nevermind having to run around after OH, children and work. I hope you have managed to hatch a plan to help lighten your load for the long term. You simply cannot carry on carrying all the responsibilites yourself, you'll make yourself poorly. Love to you x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 5, 2007 Share Posted December 5, 2007 Hindsight is a wonderful thing! Parenting is so much easier once you've done it!! Gina, why wait till Stefan is older? Start now! Only make it part of your routine and do it together. 'Have we tidied away all our toys before tea/bed?' If we have, then we'll put a sticker on the chart (or something). When we've got 10 stars we've earned ourselves . . .a bar of chocolate after dinner/a drink in a café/a trip to the farm/whatever suits. I know Stefan is really, really young but if you can establish good habits now, you won't have to work so hard later on, when you'll have more to cope with! Nor will things have to get unpleasant, it'll just be what you do! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chickencam Posted December 5, 2007 Share Posted December 5, 2007 I agree they must be put to work early. I didn't do it early enough with mine and now we are fighting an uphill battle. They have all got jobs - younger 2 set the table for meals & make drinks then clear the table afterwards with the youngest cleaning the mats and putting them away. The eldest has to load the dishwasher and wash any pans that are left, we are pretty good at clearing as we go, well hubby is I am still training The thing that we did wrong was not insisting on tidy bedrooms and folded cothes from an early age. Our youngest is the worst she has a very small room which we have tried to furnish to maximise her stoage and space but we had to help her sort it out a few weeks ago because it had just got beyond her and nearly us. Every box, drawer,shelf and cupboard was a jumble of allsorts including dirty socks tissues and other yucky things Everywhere we looked we found at least one playmobil person we didn't know we had that many. We now check her room every day and have a penalty point system which involves favourite things being confiscated or favourite programmes not being watched on tv and so far I think she is getting better but we daren't take our eye off the ball. Our son's worst sin his his dirty washing we have a big chest on the landing which is easy to throw things into but they all seem to find it difficult and will suddenly dump a weeks worth at a time which makes washing a nightmare but I now refuse to go and collect it so if they have to go to school in dirty clothes then that's their hard luck but it is sooo hard. Our son has now got his own pop up laundry bag on his wardrobe door and drop kicks his clothes into it each night and that seems to be working and I will empty that what I will not do is scrabble about under his bed for lost socks and undies. I was a horribly untidy child and my mother laughs every time I mention my kid's mess We keep the lounge free of child things as far as possible but they do have a habit of just sort of shedding things around the house. Parenting is a fairly repetative, relentless task but at least we can come on here and let it all out Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daywalker Posted December 5, 2007 Share Posted December 5, 2007 Our two 12 yo's have to tidy their room on Friday's or no pocket money. It's messy during the week but at least 1 day is nice. We find rewards work better than punishment, though there are still times when we have to punish obviously. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snowy Posted December 5, 2007 Share Posted December 5, 2007 I love that term 'shedding toys as they go'! It's exactly what happens isn't it? Every now and again I put all the toys I find downstairs into a tubtrug and cart them back upstairs. Within a couple of days, there are stray trains, bits of lego etc all over the place! I think they just pick things up and then carry them around until they need their hands, then it gets put down wherever they are standing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egluntyne Posted December 5, 2007 Share Posted December 5, 2007 Every now and again I put all the toys I find downstairs into a tubtrug and cart them back upstairs. Another use for a tubtrug!! What would we do without them? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jules. Posted December 5, 2007 Share Posted December 5, 2007 I have a red tub trug on my Christmas list Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeckyBoo Posted December 5, 2007 Author Share Posted December 5, 2007 Hi just to say thanks to everyone for the moral support! Normally I manage because, complain though I might, my kids are actually not bad children, they're just busy busy busy, far too busy to be doing boring things like clearing. And normally I cope with having to nag them, bribe them, reward / punish them, just Monday morning for some reason I snapped. And I don't think it did them any harm to be honest, they realised they had overstepped the mark and gone just that bit too far. Unfortunately I was at work until last night (last one for a week hooray! ) so wasn't able to reinforce the - no tv / story til bedrooms are tidy, but OH made a stirling effort and they, apparently, did more or less as they were told. Getting dressed has been better the last two mornings altho I think I'll always have to "encourage" eldest! Mostly it's my sleep deprivation that causes the problems, if they're messy, rude, noisy whatever I can usually manage to resolve it and get them round it but when I'm tired, and I mean REALLY tired I don't have the same patience. I have to manage on between 3 1/2 - 4 hours a night if I'm lucky for 6 nights every other week. I've just recovered and it's time to go back to work again! Still, I love being a hectic, chaotic, noisy Mum so I guess that's why I got three happy, healthy, argumentative, bright, chaotic noisy children! Thanks again Mrs Bertie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jules. Posted December 5, 2007 Share Posted December 5, 2007 Enjoy your time off Mrs B. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egluntyne Posted December 5, 2007 Share Posted December 5, 2007 And keep up the new resolve! It'll become second nature in a few weeks. Have a good break. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ain't Nobody Here Posted December 5, 2007 Share Posted December 5, 2007 Still, I love being a hectic, chaotic, noisy Mum so I guess that's why I got three happy, healthy, argumentative, bright, chaotic noisy children! Good for you - they're the best kind . I don't know how much difference it makes training our kids to be tidy. I did a pitiful job of it when mine were small but I now have a 15 yr old who was horribly messy but is getting a bit better (never makes his bed though - "I don't care if it's made or not so why should you?") and a 13 yr old who is so tidy he puts everything away every night, packs his bag the night before, makes his bed and puts away his clean clothes, all without being told to (even OH doesn't do that ). So, how much is nurture, how much nature . Who knows? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted December 5, 2007 Share Posted December 5, 2007 Rosie has a sticker on the door of her room; it says: 'Why should I tidy my room when the world's in such a mess?' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
feemcg Posted December 5, 2007 Share Posted December 5, 2007 Good point Claire My eldest daughter is 17 (and a half ) and was only doing the odd empty of the dishwasher. A few months ago I was standing ironing her clothes for almost 2 hours when I thought, what on earth am I doing - she's up at the boyfriend's and I'm standing here - that night I told her that if she's old enough to spend every other evening with her 'serious' boyfriend she's old enough to do her own ironing. I felt a bit mean but haven't backed down and she's doing it with no complaints (wish I'd told her sooner!). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egluntyne Posted December 5, 2007 Share Posted December 5, 2007 My son does his own ironing. I can't say his bedroom is the tidiest in the world...but at least you can see some of the floor. I will only clean it if he tidies it first. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted December 6, 2007 Share Posted December 6, 2007 Good point Claire My eldest daughter is 17 (and a half ) and was only doing the odd empty of the dishwasher. A few months ago I was standing ironing her clothes for almost 2 hours when I thought, what on earth am I doing - she's up at the boyfriend's and I'm standing here - that night I told her that if she's old enough to spend every other evening with her 'serious' boyfriend she's old enough to do her own ironing. I felt a bit mean but haven't backed down and she's doing it with no complaints (wish I'd told her sooner!). I did that - now her clothes are NEVER ironed! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lesley Posted December 6, 2007 Share Posted December 6, 2007 My son and daughter were the same - you get over the shame eventually Ginette I used to tell them that it reflects on me as a mother - but they said that was not their problem, they were quite happy They both ironed their clothes after a while though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laura & CTB Posted December 6, 2007 Share Posted December 6, 2007 I've just got an e-mail from DS who's coming home from uni on Sunday - it says " I have a suitcase full of stuff to bring back" I hope this means Christmas pressies and not washing Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted December 6, 2007 Share Posted December 6, 2007 It'll be washing Laura - you can be sure of that! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ain't Nobody Here Posted December 6, 2007 Share Posted December 6, 2007 I make both my boys iron their school shirts. It worked for a year or two, now 15 yr old is quite happy to go to school with creased shirts . They both have to do the dishes at least once a week and help put the rubbish out. Not much, if you ask me. I think they now need to learn how to clean toilets and baths . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
