Sooo much pooping

[Chucky Mama]

I had mine yesterday We are decorating our bathroom at home and I had the tricky task of picking the paint to go with the tiles & floor etc. I went into homebase and picked a plum colour but phoned OH for a second opinion as it was quite a bold colour...he approved. Still unsure, I phoned MIL, whilst discussing it with her, I dropped the tin - it exploded all over the floor I was horrified, thankfully the only witness was a member of staff who just told me that it happens all the time and didn't seem that worried. MIL was on the end of the phone and said 'well what does it look like now it's on the floor" Good point, it looked rather revolting so I picked a different colour and scuttled out of the store

[Alis girls]

Probably not my most embarrassing as I have so many. Some years back my friend and I decided to join PTA of our 2 sons new secondary school and muggins volunteered to run the grotto! Well we were in this decorated gazebo in Santa hats and dressed in red with a Santa (aka caretaker) who kept nipping off to feed the reindeer (to have a crafty fag) when the headmaster and his wife appeared. We had been given this rickety arm chair for santa and the headmasters wife decided to try it out (she wasnt what you call slim - rather portly) so muggins here said loudly "be careful its not that strong" without thinking that I am implying that shes er fat. My friend no help at all nudged me and sniggered and the headmaster glared at me. I made it worse by telling her I wasnt implying she was heavy - needless to say ES was mortified when we told him and my friend didnt help as she had a fit of the giggles when I was telling the family about my faux pas.

[Cinnamon]

That would be when I bounced up to a man whose face I recognised & gave him a great big hug........................only to realise upon releasing him that the reason I recognised him was that he was Kenny Lynch (it was the '80s,he lived in Henley)

 

Never lived that one down

 

Or it could have been when aged 16 in my first interview at a well known department store,I trumped loudly

I didn't get the job.

[ClaireG]

I have quite a few of these but i think this is my most embarrassing one!

 

I had only been going out with hubby for a few weeks, when i took him to meet a friend of mine. Said friend lives in Birmingham, so knowing we all liked curry, we decided to go for a balti. The restaurant we went to was quite basic and you had to take your own booze, so we popped to the offie before going in. It was really busy, so we were told we could have a table upstairs. Several hours and drinks later, we went to leave. I was leading the way and got to nearly the bottom of the stairs where there was a small landing and then a tricky two further steps. I turned to tell the other two to be careful and went flying and ended up sprawled on the floor with my chin resting on a table very narrowly missing someones meal The poor chap quite quite a shock and hubby and friend were very quiet for a few seconds until they realised i wasn't hurt and burst out laughing.

 

It's a standing joke with my friend now even after nearly 14 years and every time i go near stairs she still tells me to mind the bottom step

[patsylabrador]

I apologise because I am reposting this sorry tale I posted last year, but it must be my most embarrassing moment. It was in response to Chucky Mama then.

 

 

'I don't know if this is the kind of thing you mean, but about 25 years ago, I was in Oberammagau, visiting the Passion Play theatre with my husband and we thought we'd go on a tour. Our german isn't very good so we just tagged onto what we thought was a tourist group. Eventually the group climbed up onto the stage, arranged itself into a semi-circle and started to sing 'Oh Tannenbaum'. We were on the very end and didn't know what to do, so we just mimed along. They were filming what I guess was a choir and when they watched it they must have wondered who on earth we were.

It was weird because no one challenged us or even seemed to notice us. After the song we slipped off the stage and ran out the back door into a yard and surprised a man working there and found the nearest bar. I still can't believe it actually happened, it was all so surreal. '

[Chucky Mama]

I apologise because I am reposting this sorry tale I posted last year, but it must be my most embarrassing moment. It was in response to Chucky Mama then.

oops, have I asked this before

Worth hearing your story again though would be great if you could get the recording

[snowberry]

Jeeeez...where to start!

 

I went for a job interview in a department store franchise in my best outfit, a dark blue satin shirt & long black skirt(it was the 80's). When I turned up I was mortified to see the assistants all wearing identical outfits to mine. I didn't get the job

 

A few years later I was in a nightclub & a girl came up to me & said 'Hi Emma'....blimey how do you know my name I asked...she gave me a very strange look & said 'It's me, Paivi, your flatmate' & she was wearing one of my dresses

[snowberry]

This is going to be a very popular thread methinks! I just thought of another!

 

Years ago I was waiting at the lights at the end of Carnaby street in London. I thought it strange that we were waiting for AGES. Then I thought it odder that I was amongst a large group of screaming girls....then I realised that the lights were a way off & I was in a crowd of girls waiting to get a glimpse of Jason Donovan as he was in Joseph at the time. You must understand that this was mortifying for an UltraGoth

[patsylabrador]

No, ChuckyMama, you asked 'what are the chances?', it was a fun thread as well.

[Olly]

So many, and most of them I have successfully blotted out of my memory - I don't think I posted about this at the time though, it happened only a couple of months ago.

 

I was having a new patio laid, and the builders/landscape gardeners were working late. I was going out for the evening so I said cheerio, and went round the corner to get in my car which I'd had to move off the driveway. I realised almost immediately that I'd left my mobile phone in the kitchen, and I drove round the block so I could pop back in and get it. The builder's van was parked just before my driveway, and a truck parked just the other side, and as I approached I thought 'there's no room to pull in - oh yes, I can just do it'. Yes - I managed to s"Ooops, word censored!"e my car down the side of the builder's van while he and his mate stood there watching!

Mortified doesn't express it - I wanted to disappear from view! They were really nice about it.

[meezers]

Well I found my most embarrassing moment shamefully amusing. It was back in the early 90's and I was out with my workmates and our other halves for our Christmas do at a reasonably posh hotel. This hotel had a big wide staircase leading up from the foyer, the dining room was to the left of the staircase with glass doors. My friend and I had just visited the ladies , which was upstairs. I missed my footing on the very top stair and went head over heels all the way down, I actually thought to myself as I was falling ' it's ok, I'll stop at the flat bit halfway', but I didn't, I carried on tumbling and when I realised I wasn't stopping I swore very loudly . I landed in a heap at the bottom and opened my eyes to see the vicar and a group of carol singers peering worriedly at me -I should have been mortified but I just burst out laughing, the staff were running around finding me a chair and wondering whether to phone for an ambulance, my friend didn't know where to put herself and I was in stitches on the floor . Completely unhurt I picked myself up, brushed myself down and we sneaked back into the dining room pretending nothing had happened.Everyone was tucking into their main course. No one said a word so I whispered to OH 'I've just fallen down the stairs' he replied ' we know, we saw you' I didn't know whether to be insulted by his lack of concern or embarrassed that everyone had witnessed it

[Alis girls]

One thing a lot of us have in common is we are gigglers and once I start I cant stop. I loved all these stories - the image of Patsy and OH singing away had me sniggering - please get a copy of it for us to see. the other thing I regularly do is dig myself a hole by trying to make the situation better and actually making it worse.

 

Open mouth - insert foot

[Tutti Frutti]

Too embarrassing to leave online!

Edited April 8, 2016 by Guest

[Willow]

Before my eyes were fixed I was very short sighted and used to be quite a keen swimmer as I travelled a lot for work and most hotels had a pool. So many of my embarrassing moments relate to my difficulties getting from unfamiliar pools to changing room.

 

One hotel (Holland I think) I found myself wandering through the mens changing room and realised either all the men had uniform darkish trunks (all I could see was a blur) or they were all naked

 

I got out of one pool and realised I had no idea where the changing rooms were and all the walls were uniform colour so I had to get to a wall and walk around beside the wall until I found a gap and hope for the best (that was the ladies that time).

 

Another time a work friend and I went to a different pool one lunchtime in London and we realised neither of us could see and the third friend who could see wasn't with us. We got changed walked out and no sign of the pool or anyone helpful. We wandered all over looking for the pool. At ne point we were one each side of the stairs feeling our way down gripping the banister. Eventually we found the pool had our swim and returned to the office. Whereupon all the blokes in the office fell around laughing and asked hadn't we noticed we were the only women as it was a well known gay pool - that did explain why the ladies changing room was deserted and no where near the pool

[Alis girls]

Blimey I am so naive - didnt know they had er gay pools. Even thou I can see (except for reading) I probably wouldnt have noticed. Hearing the wrong thing is my problem - this am ES said "wheres my Nivea?" - I was on Omlet so wasnt really concentrating so said "on your desk" - long silence and his reply " no I asked where Namibia is?" oops

[Ain't Nobody Here]

I've probably posted this before but here goes ....

 

There was building work was going on at my work. One of the builders came in to tell us not to use the loo as it wasn't plumbed in and any contents would just fall out of the waste pipe (from the 3rd floor onto the carpark/building site below).

 

Pity he hadn't mentioned it before I'd gone to the loo. And pity I had an upset tummy that morning . I never owned up .

[Chucky Mama]

[Redwing]

.....this am ES said "wheres my Nivea?" - I was on Omlet so wasnt really concentrating so said "on your desk" - long silence and his reply " no I asked where Namibia is?" oops

 

 

I remember my husband telling me that Lord Lichfield had died and I asked 'How did all of Litchfield die?!'

[Space Chick]

Ahhhhh so many to choose from

 

This is a recent one....

 

I'd gone for a bath and had forgotten that Sainsburys were coming to deliver a shopping order.

 

I'd got dried and dressed putting my jammies on.

 

Then Sainsburys came... Young lad.... First time he'd driven the van (so I discovered from our chat at the door, me in my night wear... OH nowhere to be seen )

 

Well id been leaning forward to pick up the boxes, On the very last crate I realised that the delivery guy could see down my top and see my boobs

 

He was rather friendly though

 

I was mortified

[Tutti Frutti]

He was rather friendly though

 

I'm not surprised!

[Looney]

Aaaah, you've made my cry with laughter!

 

For some reason I can't think of any embarrassing moments to write down.....yet I know that there have been plenty! Must have blocked them out....

[snowberry]

I've been sniggering & spluttering at all your posts so much that my kids know all your embarressing bits

[meezers]

I'm sitting here chuckling away with OH tutting loudly behind me - grump! patricia - I love the 'uniform darkish trunks'- were there no red heads or blondes ? being very short sighted myself I can well imagine it.

[The Dogmother]

.....this am ES said "wheres my Nivea?" - I was on Omlet so wasnt really concentrating so said "on your desk" - long silence and his reply " no I asked where Namibia is?" oops

 

 

I remember my husband telling me that Lord Lichfield had died and I asked 'How did all of Litchfield die?!'

 

sort of thing I'd do, being pretty deaf in one ear

 

Can't remember a lot so mine and I have a high embarrassment threshold so not much worries me. However, when Rosie was toddling she grabbed onto my elasticated skirt then fell over pulling it down... let's just say that I'm not known for wearing much underwear

[Alis girls]

And the conclusion reached is that we are all barking totally barking - woof