Nacktschnecken omlet Cube

[Chicken deficient]

I took my little boy to nursery for a trial session this morning. I found it quite a traumatic experience - I feel quite guilty, like I am about to dump him in kennels and I've never even done that to the dogs!

 

Did your children go to nursery, or did you wait until they went to primary school?

[bluekarin]

Mine didn't go to nursery, but the did go to pre school from about the age of 2 1/2 to 3. They loved it as they got to plays with lots of toys and made lots of new friends, and also learnt a lot. Their preschool was also linked to their primary school so they got to stay with the friends theyd already made and it wasnt quite so scary.

 

My friends who have young kids now send theirs to nursery and their kids love it too. One goes to a nursery who advocates outdoor activities pretty much all year round.

 

I would say don't feel bad, but I felt bad when I left mine for the first time. Just think of it being the first stages of the apron strings getting longer before they are finally cut when they leave home. It really helps with their independence. I am sure he will love it.

[sage]

My DD has been going to nursery 2 days a week from the age of 9 months she will be 5 in October. She loves it, cannot wait to get there. I get told to wait in the car if I go to pick her up early.

 

Sage

[Grandmashazzie]

Yes I agree it is good to begin their socialisation with their peers especially if this group will go on up to school together and also it's good for you to get to know these mums whose children will be sharing your child's life with for the next few years.Also I am sure you are not letting him know your a bit anxious and enjoy having a coffee in peace,much as I love my little darlings (they're big now) and we have fostered about 20 children I loved that couple of hours to myself when nursery started.Enjoy.

[Chicken deficient]

Thanks, that helps. I'm sure he will enjoy the experience more than I will. I kept thinking how nice it would be to have some time to myself, but now the reality is a bit closer, I just keep thinking how much I'm going to miss him - even if it will only be 3 hours twice a week. They may as well have not cut the umbilical cord up until now!

 

We've got another settling in session tomorrow morning, so I'm steeling myself for that.

 

Thanks again.

[C&T]

My LO has been going for nearly a year, since she was 12months old, for 3 days a week.

 

She gains so much from going. Apart from getting used to different people, she also experiences different food, and also does a lot of activities that I am unlikely to do at home. Things like stripped to nappy and rolling around in paint on the floor! I also think the socialisation is really important - learning how to interact with others her own age. I'm back on mat leave soon - but we've worked hard to ensure LO can continue nursery for a couple of days a week, as she really seems to love it - running in without a backwards glance.

 

The down side - the bugs. Nurseries are breeding grounds for bugs! And the washing... The mess she comes home in!! Primark clothes are a must...

 

But the first few days is hard on you the mum. After all, no-one can look after them as well as us can they!! But time apart can really enhance your relationship too.

 

So embrace, enjoy your "time off" and at least at the beginning plan some nice treats - even if just a long hot bath and a good book!

[freddie]

Mine are now 14 and 17. The 17 year old didn't like nursery much, so I withdrew him till he was nearly three. The 14 yr old hated the whole thing, so we didn't bother! Both are pretty balanced, bright kids, with friends. I found they socialized enough with other kids around at home and friends houses, who they are actually still friends with, even though they've all gone to different schools/colleges throughout, so follow your instinct, and see how your little one likes the idea!!

Good luck with it all!! They are only little for such a short time... my boy is now 6 foot 3!!

[Chicken deficient]

Thank you again for your helpful words!

I think a trip to Primark is a good idea - I can see he'll only get a few hours of wear out of his clothing and I even though he'll only be there for 3 hours, he still needs to take 2 sets of clothes!

 

Apparently half of them are off with chicken pox at the moment, so that'll be the first bug to look forward to. Poor chap!

 

We did try this settling at nursery procedure before, when he was 12 months old and I was supposed to be going back to my job, which I loved, but it REALLY didn't work! He really wasn't ready for being left. I miss my job, which I had to give up, but it was the only option.

 

We talked about it at bed time and he is looking forward to going again tomorrow morning, which makes me feel a bit happier. He has just turned 3, so if I leave it much longer, he'll be going to school anyway.

[Willow]

It does get easier And both of mine appeared to enjoy nursery.

 

One of the wonderful things about nursery is you get to know a group of women locally who are all trying to balance work and childcare and if you keep in touch with them as they grow up your children are all going through the same stages together so you can compare notes and get advice.

 

The group of friends I made there have also been my safety net (and I have been their's) for when something comes up at work when I really need help. Once when I'd timed a return flight so I could do the school pickup and the airport was evacuated it was one of these friends I rang as I was stood outside the airport to ask to do that pickup for me as it was easier than getting my OH's boss to accept he sometimes had to be dad

[soapdragon]

Both my boys went to a lovely Montessori nursery and YS is still there - only just as he starts school after Easter (sob, sob!)

ES was reading extremely well when he left having loved it - he went for three mornings from the age of 3 increasing a bit just before he started school to build up his stamina.

 

YS goes a full day on a Wed, Thues am and Fri am plus lunch and has really come out of his shell! He, too, is reading very well and looking forward to 'big' school (tho I am NOT!)

 

I am very fortunate in that I did not HAVE to return to work after maternity leave - financially it has been a big struggle and we have no luxuries/foreign hols etc (Devon is beautiful ) but I have been very grateful to have that time at home with them. That said, tho, once the boys reached about 3 they did seem to need more input than I could provide-as has already been pointed out on this thread, nurseries can set up some activities that would be difficult at home. Equally I found it helpful from a discipline point of view and good for them to have others set boundaries etc;a good grounding for big school.

[Looney]

Both my bogwoppits went to nursery 3 days per week from 9 months old. Daughter still goes, son is now at school.

 

It is hard leaving them to begin with but I had no alternative so just had to get on with it. Apart from a few minor gripes I have been really happy with the care they get/got and they enjoyed going, somewhere that does different things to what they can do at home...really messy things!

 

But yes, the clothes get totally trashed!

[patsylabrador]

All mine went to playschool, nursery and infants. That was alright and they seemed happy. Schooling didn't work out so well as they got older so I home-schooled them. The friends they made in those early years though remained rocksolid and now in their twenties some are almost like cousins.

So I think for forming relationships those early years at playschool etc are pretty important.

[iar fach goch]

As a mum of 3 boys who all went to pre-school and now a pre-school leader, I have experienced this from both sides. I hated it when my boys started aged between 2 1/1 and 3, I wanted to keep them at home with me for ever, but at a certain point they needed more than Mum. I cried, but they were fine. All 3 of mine loved pre-school, it helped prepare them for school and they got to socialize and experience a wider range of activities than they would have done with me. At the pre-school where I now work, we take children from 2 1/2 until they reach full time education. It is a gentle introduction to leaving mum, it is much less structured than school, but it does start to prepare them for the routine of school. Not only does it help the children to make friends, but it also helps mums make new friends/contacts who they will know for many years, and can help each other out.

From my experience it is much more traumatic for mum to begin with, but it is really important that mum does not pass this on to her child. Yes, some children do shed a few tears when mum leaves, but usually stop within minutes. The children are having a whale of a time whilst mum is at home with visions of a tearful child, which is why we always text mum to let her know that the tears had stopped before she left the car park! We have only ever had to call mum once when a child had not settled, but even he came in happily by day 3. As other have said don't dress them in their best clothes and send them with a spare set of clothes just in case. They tend to pick up all sorts of bugs, but a plus point is that they tend to be healthier when they start school as they have already encountered lots of germs.

[Chicken deficient]

Thanks all again.

 

We went in to nursery this morning at 9am. I stayed about 5 minutes and then, after talking to him about it, left, with him happily playing.

 

I got home, made a cup of tea, sat down, (with a hankie), and then got called back again before I could drink it, as he was crying his eyes out too and would not let them comfort him or even touch him.

So, I stayed with him for the rest of the 3 hours and by the end of it, he was talking to some of the staff and seeming a bit more relaxed.

As we left, he was saying he wanted to go back to school.

FIngers crossed he'll manage a little longer on his own on Monday.

 

I saw the state of the children coming back from Forest School. There cannot be much mud left in the forest!

I think we may go to Primark later...!

[majorbloodnock]

My kids have about five years between them, so have completely different circles of peers. My son went to a childminder and my daughter went to a nursery. Both moved on to respective preschools before starting school proper. When each did start "big" school, it was patently obvious which of their peers had been through a childcare system and which had been brought up by mum, dad or extended family, because the former group invaded the classroom en masse with nary a wave goodbye whilst the latter group almost unanimously stood at the door crying to keep parents from leaving.

 

Neither of my children is now in the reception year, and they and all their peers have become perfectly normal confident kids, with no tangible difference between the two aforementioned groups. IMHO, you'll have to deal with the "where have mum and dad gone?" tears sooner or later; childcare choices don't vary the whether, just the when.

 

Oh, and you'll almost certainly go through a second bout of anguish when you see your child leave you without getting upset. Been there, seen it, done it, got the t-shirt. Don't worry about it and just remember it's perfectly normal.

[PurpleTree]

All of mine have stayed home with me until they turned 3 and started at the school nursery, youngest will go in September. They go for 2& a half hours every morning. The older two loved it and I didn't have any problems with them at all, I'm pretty certain youngest will be the same. As the nursery is linked with the primary school they were very prepared for moving in to Reception, the teachers came in to see them and they spent time in the classrooms.

 

Keep at it, I'm sure your little one will settle in soon, I think some kids are just more confident than others.

[Minnie&Moose]

Mine is now in Year 8 but I still remember how upset I was the first time I left him in nursery - he was only 7 months. I felt the same way when he made the transition from nursery to Foundation and then primary school - and it wasn't much better when he moved to secondary school. He, on the other hand, took each transition in his stride. Yes, there were the occasional tears, and he did point out to me, on his way to his first day in Foundation that '4 year olds don't have to go to school so why am I going? I want to go back to nursery!' but it's taken me a long time to realise that I'm the one who finds these transitions most difficult

[Chicken deficient]

I went looking for some cheap nursery clothes. They were fairly cheap, but looked really cheap, so I came home with nothing!

I have ordered him one of these though, to wear over his existing clothes:

 

http://thesmockshop.com/product_info.php?cPath=28&products_id=43

 

Given that it was originally designed for keeping fish slime off nice woolly jumpers , I'm hoping it'll do the trick of keeping the worst of nursery off his clothes!

[charly1979]

Hi all my 3 have been to nursey, I think you tend to know if they are really happy or not but you need to give it time

 

With my ED we had a horrific expeience with her first nursery I knew something wasnt right and to cut a long story short ended up coming to blows with the manager over something else and pulled her out. We found a lovely place recommended to us and she loved it so much so that both my boys went there and my nephew, my YS finishes in August and I will be so sad to say good bye, the staff have become good firends. I since found out stuff about the 1st place and some incidents that happened to Lyds that had I known Ofsted would have been called.

 

Another thing that made me chuckle about the gulit we can feel over these issuses my dad was servicing a boiler at a pre school he said all the kiddlings were playing happily but the moment pick up time came a handful started acting as if they had been traumatised all day, so I suppose that proves that on the occassions I have left one of mine wailing like a banshee and the staff reassure me he will be fine and the moment I go they will stop crying and play with the others they really arent pulling my leg Mind you my YS is number 3 so I have toughened up and I know if there is a problem they will call me

 

Hope all goes well for yo in the future x (leaving them does get easier honest)

[sage]

I get my DD nursery clothes from eBay. Never pay more than £2.50 Including postage. She has some great next & mother care stuff & it washes well.

Sage

[C&T]

Another good place for clothes are NCT sales. Cheap - and often good brands - makes me feel better when the stains just will not shift!

[Chicken deficient]

We had a better morning today. It took a few attempts before he would let me leave, but he apparently settled into playing well. There were no tears and he managed the rest of the 3 hours on his own, though he seemed very tense and stressed when I went to get him. I think he was exhausted - he's having a nap now.

I really hope he starts to relax and enjoy it soon.

 

Thanks again for all your support.

[C&T]

Glad he is settling in slowly. It is a big change - but hopefully it is a positive step! And one that will make starting School a little easier down the line. Hopefully, once he finds his feet, he will be running around with the best of them.

 

Now just stock up on Calpol, Calprofen, Olbas Oil and any other cold remedy you can find, ready for the bugs he will bring home!