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little chickadee

How do children learn tact?!!!

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My son (undergoing autism assessment) always makes some tactless comment about my (easily offended) father in law being fat. We've managed to stop him asking him why is so fat and telling him that if he didn't eat as much food and drink as much beer he wouldn't be so fat :D

 

but............ He keeps coming out with other little comments.

 

In Early December "Why is Grandpa so big and round like a ball?"

 

Late December " Augustus Gloop (Charlie and the Chocolate Factory) is even fatter than you Grandpa"

 

Yesterday - He (my son) was talking about how he's glad he's a boy human and not a boy chicken because he would have been made into chicken pie , then he saie

"If you were a chicken Grandpa, you would be a very fat one!"

(Grandpa walks out of room!) :lol:

 

what have your children said which made you want to curl up and die? and any ideas how I stop him offending my Father in law?!!

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You've just gotta love kids with the things they come out with...

 

They say what everyone else is thinking, often with no regard for feelings!!

 

Perhaps your father in law should see this as a positive and use this wake up call to try and watch his diet and exercise etc before it's too late?

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TO be honest I would prefer a child who was bluntly honest rather than one who lied. I would just say its not good to tell people they are fat as you may upset them and leave it at that. As someone said Grandpa may use it as a wakeup call. Hard though because if your son is autistic he really won't understand tact at all and may be not even understand what it means to hurt someones feeling because of their lack of theory of mind and all that gubbins. Maybe thats where Grandpa need to learn some tact too and not show he is hurt as it'll upset you each time and there is nothing you can do about it.

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Maybe Grandad could do with learning a bit about your son's "condition" for want of a better word.

 

He should know by now that children are learning learning where they fit in the world, and that saying blunt (and usually truthful) things is something that they learn not to do. Eventually.

 

It must be so confusing to be told "always tell the truth"" and then another time "don't say anything about Aunty Monica's moustache scratching when she kisses you".

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I have two stories for you one is from my mouth when I was about 4 and the other is my two cousins :lol:

 

I was staying with my great aunt in Motherwell and we were going downstairs past a little window with a vase of flowers on it, I asked some question about the flowers and was told they were artificial to which I announced (I can remember so clearly as well) 'My mother thinks plastic flowers are rubbish' :oops::oops::oops:

 

I wondered why everyone had gone quiet :lol:

 

The other is my two cousins who are now 25 and 22 I think :?

 

They used to stay with my mum alot at weekends when they were little and their mother used to insist they used correct words for things no slang was allowed :roll:

 

The youngest one came running into the room one day in floods of tears and said 'Aunty Pam Jamie just kicked me in the P*n*s :lol::lol::lol:

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:lol::lol::lol: Those are so funny! Stop it I'm trying to be all serious and work like today :lol::lol:

 

I'm afraid Grandad will have to stop taking himself so seriously and learn to laugh at himself! My 3 year old is determined to find out the answer to his most pressing question as he asks everyone we meet - "why do Mummys have dangly boobs?" :oops::lol::lol:

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my eldest who's nearly 7 now, once asked me in the bathroom if one day she would have boobies like mine, to which I replied yes, so she said, "what, great big ones?" so I said yes again, so she said, "What, like yours, right down to the floor?" :oops: Thank goodness for Wonderbra is all I can say :shock:

Her best friend when she was just 5, having had a bath with daddy the night before, told her reception year teacher that her daddy had a big w****, to which her teacher apparently replied, without batting an eyelid, "Lucky mummy"

And another one, when eldest was in the drs surgery waiting patiently for our turn the lady before us went int, she was quite elderly with one of those stiff whiteish / purpleish perms, and when she came back out eldest said at the top of her voice "Goodness me, what HAVE they done to her hair" :oops: The whole surgery had to look at the floor and all you could see was shoulders shaking silently whilst this woman slunk out the door!

 

Mrs Bertie

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Two summers ago we rented a lovely holiday cottage in the Conway valley in North Wales. On the first day of our hols I drove the family to a little National Trust cottage on the banks of the river that sold lovely welsh teas. I always remember visiting this cottage as a child. As the waitress brought out the multitude of cake stands, plates, teapots, etc. my son (also autistic) said, 'Wow, nice jugs.' Husband and I just looked at each other and wanted the ground to swallow us up. Thankfully the waitress found it funny. We then had to explain to a rather confused 9 year old why all the adults were laughing.

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standing in the saturday shopping queue Andy then age 6 started scratching his head, when I asked him to stop he shouted as loudly as he could WELL I'VE GOT HEAD LICE HAVEN'T I it was like the parting of the waves as all the moms grabbed their kids to let us to the tills. outside when I said you haven't got nits he replied well I just got fed up of standing there Good Kid!!!

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I was talking about this with a friend today and she said the other day, her three year old was walking behind an old man with a walking stick in the village and she said very loudly " He'll be dead soon won't he mummy!!"

 

My son is also very curious about my dad, as he died when I was 11. He has started saying to me at the moment "I'm so sorry that your daddy died and has rotted down and turned into compost" Despite myself I had to stiffle a laugh. He's such a sweet heart.

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