magamamma Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 Now i am most of the time proud of my kids for thier good behaviour but today was a different matter. Got to sainsburys and my 3 yr old grace decided we needed OJ. I brought out the exact money for what we needed and so couldn't get it. She decided to throw a mammoth tantrum right there and then and all the way to the checkout where i told her that i'd not talk to her until she was calm. Well she carried on screaming like a banshee and as i was walking out a middle aged guy came over to my daughter and told her to 'shut up' and that she 'deserved a slap' I told him to keep quiet and to pass judgement on his own kids and not mine. she has honestly never done it before and she picked the most embarrassing time to do it. quite upset actually Maggie.P 07 lily bluebelle henrietta Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chickencam Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 Most children do this once or twice in their life. It is not a problem if you can ignore them it is other people who are the problem Don't worry you did the right thing Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Helen&Lee Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 I told him to keep quiet and to pass judgement on his own kids and not miine. Good on you! If he has kids of his own he's obviously not played much part in their lives if he doesn't recognise a temper tantrum. Helen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egluntyne Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 Children throw wobblies from time to time....it is all part of growing up. That man had no right to speak to you the way he did. Any decent person would completely ignore the child's behaviour, especially if they have had children themselves as they know the child's parent would feel that all eyes were upon them. If you believe in karma....he'll get his payback. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snowy Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 Oh Maggie you poor thing You did do exactly the right thing, but it is so upsetting when outsiders butt in isn't it? Someone did it to me a few weeks ago, and my 3 year old wasn't even playing up! He was sat in the trolley chattering away ten to the dozen, and a woman walked past, turned to him and said 'oh for goodness sake, shut up will you?' I shouted at her to come back and explain herself but she scooted off PDQ. I was blazing! Even though I knew her comment was unjustified it upset me for ages. She, like your chap, was bang out of order and you have every right to be angry. Unfortunately, it is one of those things that you have to let go rather than stew on it - take some deep breaths and try to feel sorry for him for being such a sad, uptight individual. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chelsea Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 That man had no right to speak to you the way he did. . Too right! I would have told him to mind his own business No wonder you are upset. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
magamamma Posted March 12, 2008 Author Share Posted March 12, 2008 thankyou for your replies. It annoyed me because i was dealing with it. Might not have looked that way to them but she is back to her normal crazy self now. To be fair before that i was smiling because it was so funny listening to her screaming away saying ' i just want orange juice' but after that i wanted to beat him up . I've had a cuddle now from grace and a lovely bit of pizza. She got toast Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ain't Nobody Here Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 What a creep . How dare he pass judgement . You did the right thing - don't worry about it. Snowy, I can't believe someone said that to your child . Lucky for her she managed to scarper . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ziggy Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 That's so shocking!!! A friend of mine had a similar experience with her child screaming and a stranger actually grabbed the child by the shoulders and told her to be quiet!!!! It really goes to show that some people know nothing about tantrums yet decide they are qualified to interfere, cause tantrums are best ignored as much as possible!!! And slapping a child who is screaming would only result in ..... more screaming!!! That kind of things makes me so angry!!! Why do idiots always think themselves right and clever?? After all the child is a child, that's a good excuse for behaving inappropriately from time to time, what's the interfering adult's excuse for lack of manners and nice behaviour?? The only nice way to deal with other people's kids' tantrums anywhere, in my opinion, is a discreet, sympathetic smile to the parents... the kind of 'don't worry, we've all been there' smile... I know it's easier said than done, and I'd be boiling with rage too, but try not to worry about it... some people are just not nice, nothing much can be done about it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
baby bears mum Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 You handled things beautifully. He is the one with the problem and trust me it will take more than growing up to solve his!!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 Of course, if you were the type to 'give her a slap', I'm pretty sure the same gent would have had plenty to say about you abusing your child.... You can never win when a child has a tantrum in public - smack their bum and you're a child abuser, ignore them and you're a terrible mother. All parents have been put in that position at some point, and should really have a huge amount of sympathy for you - I can only imagine thaat this gent has never been shopping with a 3 year old. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
craftyhunnypie Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 You did the right thing by ignoring her. If you'd given in to her, she will do it even more for the attention! So well done for being strong! The man had no right to tell her to shut up etc. He's probably got very unruly children at home because of his approach. When I was little I used to pull faces & throw tantrums. My mum once asked a stranger to tell me that I was a pretty girl & pretty girls don't pull faces & throw tantrums..& to tell me how silly I looked! I soon snapped out of it! All children have tantrums! Don't let it get you down - I bet she's an angel now she's home? Emma.x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egluntyne Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 (edited) When I was little I used to pull faces & throw tantrums. Never! Edited March 12, 2008 by Guest Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paola Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 I am shocked at the bare face cheek of people Have had to mod myself I always ignore mine if they throw a wobbly, I find it is the best way and they soon run out of steam I will never forget the times in Bluewater with my DD1 She would be in full flow of throwing herself about the floor and screaming and I would either just step over her or just stand and wait for her to finish Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ajm200 Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 Children can really pick their moments to play up and can really make you cringe with embarassment sometimes but that's part of being a parent. Usually after you've just told someone how good they are No-one has the right to interfere so i don't blame you for being mad. That guy should learn to keep his mouth shut. He may be middle aged but obviously he still hasn't learnt how to behave appropriately in public At the age of 3 your daughter has an excuse. You may find that he reacted like that because he has children that are absolute horrors Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
craftyhunnypie Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 Watch it! I can throw a good tantrum these days too if I have too! Emma.x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
superjules Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 Oooh, people like him make my blood boil. What a nasty piece of work. DD is very determined when she has a tantrum - she has gone on for over 40 mins in public before now. I've had comments and looks from people but my view is: she's the child and I'm the parent; she's lost control and it doesn't mean I should do the same. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chelsea Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 but my view is: she's the child and I'm the parent; she's lost control and it doesn't mean I should do the same. Very good way of thinking! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
superjules Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 but my view is: she's the child and I'm the parent; she's lost control and it doesn't mean I should do the same. Very good way of thinking! It has saved me going over the edge many a time. She's a challenge, bless her. If I'd have had her 1st there'd be a MUCH longer age gap between my kids! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
little chickadee Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 You poor thing. That makes me so cross on your behalf ! Glad to hear you've calmed down. People can be so rude Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hillfamily Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 I can't believe someone would have the cheek to tell your child to be quiet. All children have tantrums and the best way to deal with them is to ignore the child because anything you say or try to do will make it worse. They'll stop soon enough when you don't react I can still vividly remember DS lying on the floor in Boots screaming hysterically and DD screaming blue murder in Argos because she couldn't have another Barbie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theherd123 Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 DD screaming blue murder in Argos because she couldn't have another Barbie I think i would scream blue murder if someone tried to buy me a Barbie! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hillfamily Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 DD screaming blue murder in Argos because she couldn't have another Barbie I think i would scream blue murder if someone tried to buy me a Barbie! I scream blue murder and stamp my feet if I have to go anywhere near Argos now Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 Rosie used to do that when we were shopping, I used to walk to the end of the aisle wheer I could still see her, but it wasn't so deafening, and just ignore her until she'd finished. I once had my legs slapped in Sainsburys for having a tantrum (and no, that wasn't last year, Em! ) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fairy&cake Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 Oh Maggie you poor thing You did do exactly the right thing, but it is so upsetting when outsiders butt in isn't it? Someone did it to me a few weeks ago, and my 3 year old wasn't even playing up! He was sat in the trolley chattering away ten to the dozen, and a woman walked past, turned to him and said 'oh for goodness sake, shut up will you?' I shouted at her to come back and explain herself but she scooted off PDQ. I was blazing! Even though I knew her comment was unjustified it upset me for ages. She, like your chap, was bang out of order and you have every right to be angry. Unfortunately, it is one of those things that you have to let go rather than stew on it - take some deep breaths and try to feel sorry for him for being such a sad, uptight individual. OMG, i cannot believe that Megamama And Snowy, what an idiot she was. I am a reasonable, easy going person, but if ANYONE was like that to Seth, i would litterally grab them and throw them against the shopping aisle wall. I have an evil temper when someone insults my family, you did well not to go mental at her. Trouble is, KNOW loosing my temper isn't the right thing to do, as its a bad example to Seth, but i cant litterally help it. [hope nothing like this happens to me] When he was critically ill in intensive care, and had extreme jaundice and nurse walked past and said: 'He looks like hes been Tangoed Luv' I went mad. I was already really upset anyway. Anyway- just ignore them. Youll be ok tomorrow and they should be ashamed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
