A heavy heart

[Chicken on a mission]

Thanks everyone for making me cry

 

I'm just desparate to get myself sorted out. I have had a picture of myself as a size 10-12 (12 years ago) on my fridge in the vain hope that this is what would motivate me but it hasn't.

 

One of my friends gave up smoking 6 weeks ago by having a big sign on the fridge door 'Do you want the children to be motherless?' Hard hitting and I think it might just work because I'd do anything for my daughter.

 

Our family GP retired earlier this year and he had been the doctor for 4 generations of our family.

 

I never thought that anyone could replace him but my new doctor was fantastic. He listened, didn't rush me and empathised. He was everything I could hope for because he is actually interested and is offering me help at last.

 

Every 6 months when I have trapsed back to the doctor for the pill I have been almost in tears at how my weight has stuck or gone up. I lost loads after I had my daughter but when she suddenly stopped feeding at 9 1/2 months for no reason what-so-ever it all started to pile back on again.

 

It's funny how I am looking forward to such difficult times with such relish

 

But I will need the help when the good intentions start wearing thin

[Guest]

Good luck Thalia! I am so sorry you have had this shock to deal with. I really understand what you mean about following a strict diet. It's so much easier than just 'cutting down' because you know the rules.

 

I did a low-carb diet a few years ago and impressed myself by losing 3 1/2 stone in 5 months. However, it was so strict that I was frightened to come off it and didn't know how to eat normally. It also made me binge in a far worse way than ever before and it has taken me 2-3 years to adjust to normal eating again. It took 3 years, but I have put all the weight back on and more! So, a sensible eating plan is far better but only if it works! I will binge on anything, however healthy and the result of course is that I don't lose weight.

 

I am trying to return to the days when I was more restrained over what I ate. I want to change my bingeing/ snacking foods into carrots, celery, cucumber etc so that I'm not struggling not to eat anything between meals, just changing what I eat.

 

A food addiction is the hardest sort to control in a way because we all have to eat. I'm not saying other addictions are easy to deal with, but the problem with food is that we can't say 'that's it, I'm not eating any more'. We have to control it. I suspect that smokers and drinkers would find it even harder if they had to have a cigarette or drink 3 times a day.

 

I wish I could get motivated to lose weight again. I dread the summer!

 

Keep posting Thalia. We're all supporting you!

 

xx

[The Dogmother]

COAM, so sorry to hear that you've been in pain and poorly. But it sounds like you're taking charge and determined to make a new start. Try PMing Buffie, she counsels people about dietary habits and she has made some brilliant suggestions on the forum in the past.

Edited May 3, 2006 by Guest

[Hellcat]

Thalia,

 

About Lighter Life.

 

I have a friend who, December 2004 came to a very posh do with me. She is normally a great woman and the life and soul of the party. This night, she sat in a corner and din't dance, circulate or anything.

 

January 2005 she told me she was going to do Lighter Life and explained it. I was VERY sceptical, but she explained that she was over 15 stone and had had to buy a new dress in a size 20 for the do. I backed her up and she started the programme. We had no social functions that involved food, she drank bottled water etc and did the 12 weeks 'no food' the weight fell off. She then did 12 weeks 'maintenance' where they re-introduce food groups one at a time. We had social functions geared around her eating habit that week, and the weight still came off. She bought new clothes, and became gaunt.

 

The upshot if this story is that she now has a normal life, has completely changed the way she eats for the better and, whilst she has not kept all the weight off, she has stabilised at about 11.5 stone and a size 12/14. Still going strong 16 months after starting the programme.

 

I personally don't really like the sound of these programme but this one really worked for her (and, it turns out, my hairdresser, too!). You go girl and I will give you all the cyber support you need, as I know how hard it was for her.

[buffie]

Hi there just wanted to say a little something.

 

COAM just to say you're not alone. I see many women with different eating problems, from yo yo dieters to eating disorders. I myself have been anorexic, bulimic and a compulsive/binge eater and dieter! All over 16 years ago. I worry about diet plans and programmes for many reasons and often see the results of promises but do understand why they appeal.

 

I will offer this advice to anyone who may be interested. Re learning to eat a normal diet (used in the food sense) is vital, no fads but regular meals and snacks and no missed meals, combined with regular consistant exercise, no marathons required.

 

Often people are ashamed or embarrassed that they don't know how to eat so they join a club or programme where they feel comfortable.I want to shout from the roof tops that actually you're not odd to have problems it's not unusual you don't need to hide away.

 

The first place to start is to address the dieting thinking....this is bad, can't have that etc. Then understanding triggers and what makes you tick. Acceptance of self is vital.

 

I worked on my mind to change me, the body wasn't controlling this problem but my head was and I could control my head!

 

I help others change their thinking and lifestyle.

 

Don't be too proud to ask for help and if it dosn't work try a different approach.

 

Take care and look to the future

 

BBxx

[Linda]

Buffie, thank you so much for your post. It certainly hit a chord with me! I have had an uncomfortable relationship with food over the years and it's only in the last few years that I have to come to terms with a lot of things and am now much more relaxed about it. This has been the major factor in me being able to keep my weight fairly stable. I eat pretty healthily anyway, but I really enjoy my food and virtually eat whatever I like knowing that I'm not going to cause any damage. In the past I had sometimes turned down social occasions if they involved eating (wouldn't dream of doing that now! ) and have attended various slimming clubs. You're totally right that the problem is all in the mind and that is what has to be tackled first.

 

I do feel for anyone who struggles with this because it seems so difficult before you really accept that you can educate your brain, take some control, enjoy life, and enjoy food!! It makes the world of difference.

[buffie]

Thank you Linda

 

BBx

[Mel (& Paul)]

Hi Thalia

Sorry I missed this earlier. I do hope you are feeling a bit better now? What a great GP you have - and dont forget we are always here for you on the forum - from people like me who specialise in cyber hugs to professionals like Buffie who REALLY know what they are talking about!

Lots of love and positive thoughts!

Mel

[Martin B]

I hope you are feeling better too!

[buffie]

Thought this may be useful.

 

http://www.weightlossresources.co.uk/diet/lighter_life_diet.htm

 

A dietitians review of lighter life, thought it was informative. I think it's important to understand the implications and costs and that medical supervision is vital. I also noted that if suitable for this 500 cal a day diet, very low calorie, no more than 4 months is recommended.

 

Information is power and you could also ask to see a dietitian and seek counselling. The British Dietetic Association have information

 

LINK: www.bda.uk.com

 

Hope it's useful for you,

 

BBx

[red]

Hi COAM - only just caught up with your posting. Sorry to hear about your health problems. I don't know anything about Lighter Life so can't comment (although I think a lady at my work did it when she had to lose weight for an operation) - anyway, you are doing the right thing by researching the programme to see if it's right for you.

 

As you know from my earlier posts I have been healthy eating since christmas and have reduced from 17 st 4 lb to a much healthier 14 st 13 lb (a loss of 2 st 5 lb) but still need to lose another 4 st 10 lb to reach a BMI of 22. It's steady progress but really rewarding especially when you drop that extra lb needed to bring you below each stone (I'm chuffed to be 14 s 13 instead of 15 It sounds so much less!) I feel healthier too and have had to start raiding my old wardrobe which makes me feel much more confident.

 

I always thought I ate healthily but if I'm honest I was kidding myself a bit. Sure, my table would not have looked anything like as unhealthy as the You Are What You Eat subjects BUT I did eat too many bad things alongside all the good things and at the wrong times of day etc.

 

Just like you my weight just crept up over the years. Fortunetly it was the sound of wedding bells that really spurred me on to do something rather than a health scare. I'm sure your health is a big incentive for you but try to give yourself a happy target or event to aim for too. Arrange to have a party in the Autumn or Winter and you'll be amazed at how much progress you can make.

[Hellcat]

Red, you are an inspiration to us all!

 

Keep it up. I think I eat healthily but i will be keeping a food diary over the next few weeks to see just exactly what I am really eating, and I suspect too much chocolate, cake and crisps will feature. Also, I'm going to log what time I eat things, as I am the worlds worst evening snacker.

[red]

Thanks HelenG - I did the food diary thing but only kept it up for a couple of days - no matter what method people use to achieve their goals I'm a great believer in not being obsessed by the whole thing - I know that if I did a deprivation diet I'd never sustain anything in the long term wheread I cannot imagine eating in a different way now - so long as the luxuries are occasional rather than frequent I'm okay (I had something called "chocolate lumpy bumpy cake" when I went for a meal last night - the exact opposite of what I want my new figure to be

[Hellcat]

 

We shall see. From previous postings it is fair to say I am good at the talk, but fail to walk the walk.

 

I think the food diary will be a good place to start. The thing is. I am only about a stone overweight AT THE MOMENT, but as I get older and when I stop feeding 5 of 5 i know it can only get worse so its time to start. I am actually doing 50 sit ups on the ab exerciser pretty much every morning and every evening now, so that will take care of the toning up (a bit).

 

When the weather gets warmer the lighter clothes come out and we all suddenly feel fatter than we want to be. You have a great reason to lose the weight and I know you will look fabulous on your big day.

[Chicken on a mission]

Red I am so pleased that you are so successful. The fact that you feel so good about yourself will certainly shine through for your big day

 

I have lost 1 stone since the last time I weighed myself which I am pleased with but with another 6 stone to go I need something to knock a large proportion of this on the head because it will take me 84 weeks at a pound a week to get there.

 

Lighter Life is only for people with loads of weight to shift for their health and not for the causual dieter with 1 or 2 stone to shift.

 

I went to the LL intro meeting tonight. There was nothing there I didn't already know and it wasn't the 'time-share' hard sell I was expecting.

 

This morning I made an appointment to see my doctor as I knew from research that I would need to get a certificate to get into the plan.

 

Unfortunately the first non-urgent appointment available for my doc was on 22nd May!!!

 

Hubby has just been very assertive in telling me to call them again and tell them that I need an urgent appointment given that my doctor was the one that suggested me doing this. I'll miss the next start date of 20th if I can't get an earlier appointment.

 

Despite my enthusiam, I am loathe to do this as I might be taking an appointment away from somebody that really needs it

 

I think I'll call in, explain the problem and let them decide.

 

My big concern was what would happen after the initial plan rather than sticking to the first bit. I'm not so worried now because we talked about management and reintroduction of food a few a week so that we can think about how each thing makes us feel and think and when we eat them. It will give me a tailored plan for me on what trigger foods I need to avoid to prevent me falling off the wagon.

 

Given that I have been steadily losing weight before going on the plan, I know that I have a better chance of it all staying off especially given the counselling and examination of various foods.

 

Doing this I get the chance to examine why I have a problem with food and confront it head on which will give me the best chance of beating this in the long term.

 

 

In the meantime, I look forward to Red's next installment because you truly are an inspiration

[Sheilaz]

 

......Unfortunately the first non-urgent appointment available for my doc was on 22nd May!!!

 

Hubby has just been very assertive in telling me to call them again and tell them that I need an urgent appointment given that my doctor was the one that suggested me doing this. I'll miss the next start date of 20th if I can't get an earlier appointment.

 

Despite my enthusiam, I am loathe to do this as I might be taking an appointment away from somebody that really needs it

 

I think I'll call in, explain the problem and let them decide.

 

Thalia, if you let them decide, you may be at the back of the queue. I'm with OH on this one. Be assertive & go for an earlier appointment. The terms "urgent" and "non urgent" are their terms, and not helpful to your situation.

You have just as much need to be seen quickly as many other people with earlier appts. You won't be taking the place of someone with an acute life threatening condition, they'll get seen somehow.

OH is right, the GP has suggested this, so don't wait 17 days to see a GP again. It's urgent!

Best wishes with it all, xx

[red]

Good for you COAM - it sounds like you have found something that could work for you Don't be disheartened by timescales though - I had 7st to lose originally and already that's down to 4st 10lb which sounds much better! The sooner you take the plunge the sooner it will happen - thus re: the doctors appointment - I'm with Sheila and OH on this one.

[AnnieP]

So am I. Ring up and insist its a follow up appointmet from your last one and URGENT!

[Lesley-Jean]

This morning I made an appointment to see my doctor as I knew from research that I would need to get a certificate to get into the plan.

 

Unfortunately the first non-urgent appointment available for my doc was on 22nd May!!!

 

Hubby has just been very assertive in telling me to call them again and tell them that I need an urgent appointment given that my doctor was the one that suggested me doing this. I'll miss the next start date of 20th if I can't get an earlier appointment.

 

Despite my enthusiam, I am loathe to do this as I might be taking an appointment away from somebody that really needs it

 

Well CoaM, I think there is someone who needs that appointment

 

It's YOU Stop putting others (especially strangers) first, you deserve to be first this time

[Lesley]

COAM - I do feel sorry for you, I know what pain you are in. I had the same problem last year and a scan revealed 3 gall stones. So in January I underwent keyhole surgery and they took my gall bladder out.

 

If you have to go down that route - let me know and I will PM you with some advice. On the up side - I don't have any of the problems some people do have once their gall bladders have been removed - there isn't anything I can't eat now, including chocolate (unfortunately - for all the reasons you mentioned in your post). You have reminded me why I should be trying to stick to eating better,

 

Jackie, beware!

I didn't have any problems either, after my gall bladder was removed. I could eat anything - so I did! I put on a stone and a half! I stayed like that until I hurt my knee and since then have put on an extra two and a half stone so now have 4 stone to lose

 

Thalia - Good Luck with your plan. It seems there are quite a few of us here with a fair bit of weight to lose so we can all support each other.

[Chicken on a mission]

Cheers guys

 

I'm going to give the doctors a ring tomorrow because I suddenly thought last night that the results from my blood test must be in soon so I should get to see the doctor then. I just need it to be my own one as he was the one that started all of this and I realise that a very low calorie diet is definately controversial

 

Things have been good today. I have been out in the garden all day with hubby laying the new decking. The chooks have been looking on critically!

 

When the ice cream van came, monster and hubby had one and I didn't

 

Yesterday hubby wanted a McDonalds which I was not happy about but we had worked hard on the decking and I came back with a salad for me Unfortunately my daughter decided to eat most of it (at least I have set her tastes up for life) and left her nuggets and chips so I knicked a few

 

The sad bit is that I hated the taste of the nuggets but having taking 2, I couldn't put them back and so ate them both. I felt so asshamed knowing I couldn't stop

 

I am determined to still try to eat healthilly until the LL classes start so that I have less to use. The nuggets senario shows why just cutting everythin out will be the best option for me.

 

I trying to decide what my target weight should be

 

Do I set it to just fall under the 25 BMI at 11st4lbs or aim to be in the middle of the 20-25 range at about 10st 7lbs?

 

I'll see what the doctor and LL advises.

[Lesley]

Perhaps just think in terms of each next half-stone? Sometimes the whole picture can be a bit un-nerving and impossible.

[red]

COAM - don't feel bad or ashamed over the chicken nuggets - you need to be clear on how your going to tackle your weight issue and until you decide what approach you're taking it's hard to be strict with yourself because you don't know what boundaries you're working to.

 

As for BMI - all the info I have says that 19 - 24 is the "acceptable norm" range (with lower being underweight and higher being overweight and obese). My GI book suggest a target of "around 22".

 

If you are like me (I am 5' 7") I weighed 17s 4lb in January which isn't even on the scale !!! (My BMI chart only goes up to a BMI of 37.3 for someone of my height) I found that devastatingly disheartening at first - it seemed so unfair that my first aim had to be to get on the chart!! Once I got to 17 stone I was on the chart

 

I am now more than half way down the "RED" section and gradually getting closer to being in the ORANGE overweight category rather than plain old obese! Sunday weigh-in I was 14st 11 lb which means I have now reached a total weight loss so far of 2 and half stone (BMI = 32.3)

 

Lesley's advice is spot on I think - Aim for small steps and before you know it you'll look back and see how far you've walked You really can do this for yourself COAM - I'm just a normal gal - there's really nothing special about me It will be much easier for you if you can get hubby to help by not bringing temptation into the house - my OH has really got involved and has lost over a stone and a half himself and is feeling much better for it.

 

I have found that talking about it on here is also great because - although I know that "Ooops, word censored!"ody here would judge me if I failed - it does add an extra bit of motivation

[Chicken on a mission]

Hubby has lost over 2 stone since December. The trouble is that we both have our own food issues and if 1 goes off the wagon for the night then so does the other one so it is happening twice as often for both of us if you get my meaning.

 

The weight is steadily coming off. I nicked my mums scales again today and am now 16st 8 1/2 lbs

 

My main worry was putting weight back on again having post it. I am more confident that with the counciling and the intense examination of how diferent food make you feel when you start the management programme, I can keep the weight off.

 

Last year having practiced healthier eating and going to the gym 4 times a week I dropped down to 15st 2lbs. The problem is that I keep yo-yoing. healthy eating on its own hasn't worked for me. I need the complete programme.

 

I got my blood test results back and all is normal there with a couple slightly elevated. I now have an appointment in a weeks time to see the doctor which will allow me to start LL with the next group

 

I am going to email the blog people beccause they still haven't mailed me back to tell me where I am going wrong when trying to log in

 

I have been writing everyday and will update when I can work out how so I don't clutter up this thread with too much detail:!:

[Guest]

I agree, you need to be supported. The whole household needs to change its eating habits and suggesting a McDonalds is not being supportive. Not everyone needs to go on a diet, but you all need to eat good food. Otherwise you will never maintain your weight. Bad food is by its very nature addictive and cruelly tempting. If you stop eating eat, you really will stop craving it, I promise!

 

Incidentally, I think a McDonalds salad contains more fat than chicken nuggets!