Poorly chicken

[BeckyBoo]

.....help. my son who is four, (5 in August) is going through a phase of bad eating. I say a phase but it's been about 6 months, maybe longer and all he now eats is, apples, grapes, cheesestrings (not cheese very often) processed ham and pasta (but no sauce). He'll eat plain bread but no butter and yorkshire puddings

He doesn't eat : sausages, fish fingers, spaghetti bolognese, any kind of pasta sauce, bacon, eggs, any salad (although he used to eat cucumber) meat of any description unless it's a mcDonald nugget or processed ham, cake (but he will eat icing) any puddings except ice cream, no fish, no potatoes of any kind not even chips

 

I've gone along with it because a fight seemed counter-productive, but I'm now getting so fed up and tired with it, MD eats roast potatoes but no mash or boiled, ED eats mash and jackets but not roast, mealtimes are becoming a nightmare. It doesn't help that I'm not often home in time to eat with them i guess but I can't do anything about it.

 

Any suggestions? When they were babies they all had homecooked baby food and loved it. Don't suggest letting them cook it because that doesn't work, they won't eat eggs, any of them, they don't like home made bread. They're all growing ok so I guess they must be doing alright, it would just be nice to cook a meal we could all eat....

 

BeckyBoo

[freddie]

OOH, such fun!!

Dont run a restaurant, as it'll never end!

Apart from putting potatoes on the menu instead of pasta for DD, I refuse to get into the foods wars. she hates pasta, and thats a pain enough!

Kids wont starve, but will usefood as a weapon to bludgeon parents with!

Just put a meal on the table, and thats what there is. With water in a jug, and loaf bread on the side! Be brave brace yrself, and it'll all be over in a week(ish)

Good Luck!!

Look up whats in a chees string............

[SarahJo]

???? baby new spuds with pots of butter to dip - or fave dips if they like them ????

 

I have to do roast and mash - easier if you par-boil the roasts and reserve and continue to boil ones for mash. Then mash as usual and re-heat in microwave when needed.

 

What about raw pepper and carrot sticks - cucumber too - make a pick and mix tea, with pizza, little suasages, nuggets and sausage rolls ????

 

YS used to be a 'mare when suffering from recurrent ear infections - went off just about everything. Now happily tucks into pasta (*used to be only plain with cheese and ham on side) with tomato sauce. Loves steak med/rare best tho - typical !!!!!!!

[Snowy]

Aaaaaaaaah Becky have you got my son?? Mt 5 year old will only eat, you guessed it: apples, grapes, 'clean'pasta, bread (no butter) and 's"Ooops, word censored!"ed' (grated) cheese. Although he will also eat carrots and broccoli until it comes out of his ears. The 7 year old is almost as bad with a long list of likes and dislikes. I try to serve meals in dishes in the middle of the table. I don't care who eats what, as long as it all goes! There are some good all rounders - pizza, add your topping before cooking, roast dinners - there's something for everyone there! As long as they are eating, I wouldn't worry too much. My oldest was fussy when little - now he eats everything and anything, and they were all weaned on lovingly pureed, home cooked sweet potato and lentil dishes

[debbier]

If it's any solace, my son was a terrible eater from around the age of 15 months. Up until then he had eaten anything he was given, but overnight he developed an aversion to eggs, pasta, rice, cheese and tomatoes, and lots of other things.

When at school, his lunchbox every day was a ham sandwich, for several years. I gave up trying to make it more interesting.

 

He now has a slightly more varied diet and will happily munch down most meats as long as they are very plain. He still won't eat any of the things above (so pizza is definitely out!), though will eat eggs if they are in cakes

 

He is now 17 and around 6' tall, and, although skinny(ish), is definitely not undernourished. So I wouldn't worry: it's not worth trying to use your tastes as a yardstick for what they "should" be eating. I'd definitely try to ration the cheese strings though!

 

My daughter, who would eat most things, has recently turned vegetarian I support her in her choice, but, oh, it would be nice to just cook one meal for everyone!

[Cinnamon]

I am with Freddie - apart from a few concessions to fit around my veggie daughter,they are given a meal & that is that.

 

If I listed,thought about or considered everyones likes & dislikes I would be grey

 

As the cook in the house,I always get to eat what I like - one small bonus for all that work!

[Chicktastic]

Kids wont starve, but will usefood as a weapon to bludgeon parents with!

Just put a meal on the table, and thats what there is. With water in a jug, and loaf bread on the side! Be brave brace yrself, and it'll all be over in a week(ish)

 

Really sorry but I have to agree. I cook 1 meal for everyone, they either eat it or go without till the next meal!!! If mine go through a spate of not eating properly, they get nothing between meals whatsoever, when they start eating again, it's fruit between meals for a short while before I reinstate treats! OMG It sounds like I'm such an evil mother But on the upside, I now have 2 very unfussy eaters who I can take anywhere in the world and I know they won't starve!!

 

Good Luck!! xxx

[Happy chickens!]

Patience.... easier said than done, but it is very very rare for children to starve themselves. Use vitamin drops if you are worried about nutrition, but as they are growing it's probably not as bad as you think!

 

Is the main problem for you the serving of the different meals or are you worried about their diet in general? Who feeds the children and is it an issue for them? (I'm assuming as you don't eat with them that you don't cook it too!).

 

What has worked with mine when they were younger was taking it in turns to choose meals from a selection offered (that would be MY selection ) so one night it would be DS1's choice, the next DS2's with the agreement that they would each eat the other's choice (and I have never offered 2 choices on one night!!). When fussy friends come around the baked potato with toppings to choose comes in very handy, of if I'm feeling very generous pizzas with toppings!

 

I still ask for meal ideas when I am doing the shopping, and we do discuss what is a good option and what is not and why (Domino's each night anyone?! )

 

As the others say, these fazes do pass in time, frustrating though they are.

[Christian]

When I was a lad, things were put in front of me and I ate it or went hungry. Not much help to you though!

 

how about doing a taster day? Lots of work for you in the short term, but might kick up some more options?

 

Lay out the table and make it a 'special game', lots of different foods, in small quantities, fruits, veg, pasta in sauce in little containers etc. Salads made into faces etc to try and make it fun - focusing on that rather that the food itself?

 

I think it is a game of patience and they will eventually come round.

[ladyjulian]

Do they eat at other people's houses?

 

I don't have kids, but I do remember being totally amazed when I was about 8, round at our next door neighbours house for tea, and their mum came and asked each of us what we wanted - and then cooked four different meals!

 

I told my mum (who was singularly unimpressed with the idea) and she ended up chatting to our neighbours' mum and 'just mentioning' that their kids had never had a problem eating round at ours - lasagna, pitta bread & dip, salad, all the things they flatly refused to eat at home - and after my mum grassed on their lack of pickiness at ours they didn't get a choice at home any more either!

[Cinnamon]

lots of different foods, in small quantities, fruits, veg, pasta in sauce in little containers etc.

 

Obviously Christian has picked this idea up from work

[Snowy]

lots of different foods, in small quantities, fruits, veg, pasta in sauce in little containers etc.

 

Obviously Christian has picked this idea up from work

Nice one Sarah!

[Christian]

lots of different foods, in small quantities, fruits, veg, pasta in sauce in little containers etc.

 

Obviously Christian has picked this idea up from work

and a very fussy niece and nephew - not anymore

[BeckyBoo]

Thanks guys, it normally doesn't bother me, and I don't cook three different meals. My advice to everyone else has always been to look at what they eat over a week instead of a day, but I'm tired and fed up today and this was the straw that broke the camels back. I've told him (and MD) that once or twice a week there will be new food for them to try and they HAVE to try it. If they don't like it then fine, but I am going to stamp my feet and get them to try. For goodness sakes, spaghetti bolognese isn't THAT scary?

 

BeckyBoo

[TheGirlsMum]

Neither of my girls will eat pasta in sauce or pizza but wiil eat salads and veg until it comes out of their ears.

I tend to put alsorts in bowls in the middle of the table as suggested elsewhere.

One daughter eats roast with gravy and the other one eats it plain but they both love roasts.

I'm hoping they will grow out of their phases but they are gradually eating more.

Don't beat yourself up about it.

My two are here now eating raw carrots for supper

[Chucky Mama]

How funny I was having the same conversation with a friend tonight. She visited with her 4 year old who 'doesn't eat'. We plonked her down at the table with us where she scoffed a huge bowl of pasta with chirozo & tomato sauce with chilli. Mum was , when she slowed down, I bet her I could finish before she did and off she went again.

 

I think that the food thing is one of the few areas where children feel they have control over you as they know that it will push your buttons and there is little you can do. We have always eaten the same meals -curries, chilli, thai, you name it we eat it. The heat has been gently increased with spicy food as they have got older. If there is something that they don't like, they are allowed to eat a smaller amount (eg mushrooms) but they have to have a mouthful. Tastes change and if they are not willing to keep trying, they will never know. DD stopped liking potatoes when she was 4 but still had to have a forkfull when we had them. If we tried serving a roast now without roasties she would go crazy. We had a very fussy child to supper once and I said to his mother that he could come but we were having a spicy homemade curry. She said 'that's ok he can just have rice'. I served up the same for him as everyone else and didn't say a word. He ate up and asked for seconds.

 

I would perhaps tell the children that there is going to be one meal and that they can help draw up a menu for the week. Each meal has to be balanced and perhaps go through a recipe book together. I would say that each one has to eat some of everything and if they don't like it they will have to lump it. Plus no snacking etc between meals - I have a French friend who is a fantastic cook but her son 'doesn't eat' but she allows him to eat chocolate and cake in between meals as she is worried he will go hungry

[bluekarin]

For goodness sakes, spaghetti bolognese isn't THAT scary?

 

BeckyBoo

 

well you say that, but a few years ago my ED was in floods of tears because she didn't want to eat the lasagne I cooked. It was the first time she'd had it and I guess it looked far to alien for her. She loves lasagne now, but doesn't like spag bol - even though its essentially the same thing

 

Its quite difficult when little ones decide they aren't going to eat things, especially things they previously loved. I think its their way of asserting their own ideas and part of growing up.

My SIL has been having problems with her ES who is about the same age as your little one. He would eat Weetabix, toast with Marmite, cocktail sausages, cheese, baby pots of apple purée, ham and I think that was basically it. He'd eat this sort of thing three times a day every day for months. I am hoping he is better now, but I haven't spoken to her for a while. I personally think that she and her hubby gave in far to easily when DS complained and asked him far too much, like don't you like it? Oh have an apple pot then, rather than this is dinner, eat or go hungry.

We were quite strict with our three and they aren't too fussy, but have their definite dislikes (DS does not like tomatoes, or anything red really - he will eat spag bol sauce but not tomato pieces)

I think really, to save your sanity, do the other suggestions (new foods each week which he must try). Its always the little things they do that tip you over the edge ((hugs))

[sunshinesupernova]

My 17month old has literally been driving me to tears with food. Until today, he has eaten NOTHING in the last 12 days. He's had milk, but that's it.

 

He's been waking every hour or so through the night and screaming with tummy pains because he's so hungry....

 

He's very underweight. When he feels well (like today) he'll eat like a horse and try anything you put in front of him... and sleep through the night. Generally, he'll eat for 3 or 4 days and not eat for 10 > 14 days. It started around September time and he's really not been a well boy since. He's prone to infections (ear infections specifically) and it makes him very ill.

 

We've got a visit with the consultant at the hospital tomorrow and have been waiting for months.Hopefully there is something they can do....................

[Guest]

Hi

 

Both of mine ate really healthily (homecooked baby food and I hardly bought baby food it was all our own).

My friends youngster lived on crisps(I was appalled and thought how awful)

 

The tables soon turned on me, I had one skinny beanpole son who ate meat galore , no vegetables

& one chubby sturdy son who lived on oranges and any fruit he could get, would eat lemons!.

 

This went on for quite a few years, my friends crisp eating daughter then hit about 4 years and ate so healthily, I always had to make extra coleslaw as she would eat the lot! Salads tomatoes fish etc etc etc

 

They all survived and I dont think its worth getting into a battle with them over it. I had many miserable dinners as a child being unable to leave the table until I had finished it, in tears(hiding it in mash potatoe mound or lodging it in my mouth to go to the loo). I just wouldnt get upset, cut out any biscuits etc and agree they wont starve themselves.

 

Good luck indie

[Egluntyne]

I agree. Don't stress over it. A soon as he has a growth spurt, he'll start eating for Britain.

 

When he is a teenager, her will eat you out of house and home. Nothing prepared me for the amount of food that teenage boys can put away.

 

One of mine was a bit picky for a while. I sneaked vitamin drops into his orange juice for a few months, to make myself feel better.

 

For your own sanity, it might be worth not offering too many options at meal times, otherwise you will never be out of the kitchen.

 

I eventually took the 'this is what's on offer....take it or leave it' attitude, and after a couple of grumbly mealtimes, he got stuck in.

 

Good luck.

[Purplemaniacs]

What does he eat at school?

 

I only ask as I know a child (4 year old) who doesn't eat and has been a problem eater from being tiny, she has a packed lunch each day, very limited what she likes and not very much. When it was Christmas lunch at school which all the children have her parents did not want her to have it but they were persuaded that she would be the odd one out if she had her lunch box. Well the child tucked in and ate more than the other 4 year olds, perhaps she ate it because her friends were or no one was fussing just keeping an eye on what she ate or that she knew it was that or nothing who knows but it amazed her parents.

 

Good luck.

 

Chrissie

[Seagazer]

All of mine have certain things that they are not keen on but I always dish them up anyway. Their tastes change so quickly.

 

A relatives child is an extremely fussy eater and refuses to sit at the table if we are all eating. We had a big meal for everyone, we had chicken casserole & mash, chilli & rice and a pasta dish. So plenty of choice and we thought she might have eaten some of it. What did she eat? A packet of crisps. Her mum doesn't eat much and we think she's just got into the habit of copying. She somehow managed to eat the chocolate cake that was for dessert.

 

Most kids grow out of their funny eating habits.

 

There is one food that none of mine will eat and thats fish pie - which OH and I love. I've cooked it so many times and they always refuse to eat it. I get really upset then

[Guest]

I also remember all the pasta etc I cooked mine at home that they would leave and it ended up in the bin, when they went to school I soon found out they were eating all these dishes at school!! Apparently mine didnt taste the same, the school was different?

 

Same if they went to other peoples houses for tea they came back telling me they had eaten food they wouldnt touch at home. This all went on for years.

 

They really wont starve indie

 

ps or perhaps I am a rubbish cook

[fluffyknickers]

I know exactly how you feel.

 

My now 5 year old has been like this for about 3 years. He is better now since he started school and he (reluctantly) eats school dinners each week (although says he has jacket potato which he wont touch at home?!). I have always cooked all their food and no jars when they were babies.

 

He wont eat any potato apart from chips (hope made!), no pasta, no rice, no cous cous - in fact carbs are a problem. he likes some meat but would choose sausages and chicken not beef/lamb etc. Used to only eat babycorn but will now chew up carrots quickly to get them out the way. Fruit he tolerates but just apples and grapes although I know at school they have tried lots of things that he wont at home - says he didnt like them.

 

I have been in tears MANY times at dinner where he would refuse and cry and shout and it caused many rows. The problem I had was he was also a bad sleeper so I was desperate for him to eat so I could rule out hunger for a reason for waking.

 

So, suppose what i am trying to say is if your son does sleep at night no problem then I would just do a dinner and if he doesnt want it he goes without - up to you if he still has to sit up at the table and wait for others. It will work. It is also said it takes lots of times of serving the same thing before a child will happily eat it.

 

My 3 year old daughter is a good eater and will try things but she is allergic to wheat, dairy, egg and soya!

 

Cant wait to have a teenager that says "i am starving" and I an present him with a big dinner and he asks for more.

 

Michelle

[BarbaraJ]

I was brought up that you ate what you were served up or you didn't leave the table. I was similar with mine except after a bit it was eat it or go without and get down when we had all finished. Any battle with food, crying, shouting, cajooling the child gets attention and learns how to tweak your buttons A child will eat if they are hungry and they know they will have nothing until the next meal, what child will bother when they know they will get crisps, biscuits etc in between !

A child i look after doesn't eat alot here but its not helped that at home he demands daddy gets him sausage and chips from the fish and chip shop he's 3!! which he gets 2-3 times a week. His diet is appalling at home but he gets no junk here so probably is hungry when he gets home but its something i can't change while he gets junk at home every night and weekends because he demands it!