Chicken bald back

[patsylabrador]

I've been aware for a few years that I hadn't set myself a scary challenge. It's my belief that every now and then I should do something that it would be easier to not do.

So I'm trying something at present. In the grand scheme of things it's not that scary and all you working people would probably think I'm silly. But the point is that I found it very nerve-wracking.

I got more and more nervous as I got closer to the door and my mind told me to not go up but to just go home. I could feel my heart pounding and I felt dizzy, I was that nervous.

I did my two favourite fright-beaters.

First I invoked my Zombie apocalypse survival quiz. I distract myself by rating passers-by on their likelihood of surviving a Zombie Apocalypse. That weirdly calms me down.

Second I let my feet take over and become almost like an automaton. I didn't think about all the whatifs and let my body decide. I love that when my head is all over the place, my body knows what to do. That took me through all the awkward introductions and stuff until my adrenaline decided that "Ooops, word censored!"ody meant me any harm!!!!!!! It worked out and I had a very satisfying day, I'm very glad that I didn't listen to my head - that was telling me absolute nonsense.

I'm curious about how other people manage their scares.

[Olly]

I love the 'Zombie Apocalypse' idea, might have to try that one!

 

I agree that it's good to challenge yourself occasionally. I use breathing techniques to slow myself down, and just keep thinking 'you only have to do this once, and you can walk away if you want to'. That said, there isn't much that scares me these days apart from heights, and I'm definitely not going to force myself to climb ladders!

[Plum]

Wow zombies helping you!

 

I try and imagine myself doing the thing I'm anxious about beforehand and saying the words I'll need then when I'm in the situation it's not so bad. Our imaginations are worse than reality. Yours definitely is

[gavclojak]

I am terrified of heights and water so when I was last in Mexico I saw this from the main road and thought 'when in mexico....'

I was so scared my legs were like jelly!!! but it was amazing fun, I love the feeling if terror!!

 

http://www.xplor.travel/

[Valkyrie]

Well my scariest challenges are few and far between now as MIL doesn't invite me over any more!

 

But when it comes down to anything that makes me sick with worry, I just try not to think too much and crack on with it. The more I do things that I really don't want to do, the easier the next one becomes.

 

Worst one ever was knowing I'd broken my leg in the garden, trying to get a grip of myself as I was hyperventilating and crawled indoors. When the emergency service fellow asked if my leg was bleeding I said I didn't think so as there was no icky trail behind me - I was wearing trousers. He said have a look and I really didn't want to. Cue a bit of a panic attack with a lot of panting. Well all I saw was a swollen ankle and I was fine from then on. Oh it's only my ankle and not my leg. OK. I'm fine now. How will the ambulance guys get to you. Oh I'll just open the front door, so out I crawled again and this time the guy on the other end of the line got rather worried. Nah, I'm fine, no worries. And of course that was the adrenaline kicking in. And I think I remained on hyper mode throughout my hospital stay and back at home.

 

But that was physical and those are much easier. Like seeing your children dripping blood - you just sort it out as best you can and no time to let them see you panic - it helps them to keep calm too. The mental challenges are a little more unpleasant though. But when it's done it's over and mostly they go better than you anticipate. Last session with MIL was just after Christmas and she was actually pleasant for once and I enjoyed the evening. Plus letting her see that I'm a much stronger person now has stopped her from behaving like she used to.

 

It is interesting how different people react or take charge of themselves though.

[The Dogmother]

I am with Olly on the heights thing, and apart form avoiding that one, I address the others by mentally putting on my big girl knickers and getting on with it.

[Valkyrie]

Says the bikini girl with a chainsaw!!!

[chickencam]

 

I suffered badly with panic attacks as a teenager and had to find coping mechanisms. Silently having a word with myself to calm down and the big pants thing too

 

The best thing to do is face your fears because the feeling of satisfaction afterwards is great especially if you ended up enjoying whatever it was you made yourself do. My ED really struggled too and there were times when she begged me to let her hide at home, but I knew from personal experience that would be the route to long term misery and frustration.

 

YD & DS have also had difficulties. YD is awaiting GCSE results on Thursday and keeps having palpitations etc and so do I, the worst things are the ones which you have no control over. It is so hard to control panic when you aren't in a position to physically do something about it.

[Ain't Nobody Here]

I'll let you know if and when I get any interviews for the 3 jobs I've just applied for .

[Valkyrie]

 

Just remembered - I was always scared of thunderstorms. My mother is absolutely terrified and I think that instilled a fair amount in me although I wasn't as frightened as her. Even when we were out and my brother was in a push chair and lightning struck the ground some 50 feet away from us (she screamed and we ran). If we were at home she would close all doors that had windows and open up cupboard doors in the hallway so that when the light was turned on there was no seeing lightning. I remember us all sitting round a stool on the floor playing Frustration until the storm passed. When my two came along I did my best to let them sit and watch storms with me. I still like to watch from a safe distance - don't ever like being out in them, you should see me run when I'm at the bottom of the garden but I do leave it till the last possible minute or when I hear it getting a little too close for comfort. Usually that will be either grabbing the washing or more than likely the time when I have chosen to clean out the cube and I finish up at the speed of light. Well Thor is an absolute pest! And we are lucky because the storms go round instead of overhead (the odd wayward one now and then but mostly we are free).

 

Both my children grew up without any hangups regarding storms - even sleep through it. As you say, face your fears and they will diminish.

[soapdragon]

I tend to stay pretty much in my comfort zone these days...now I am not working but, when I was working I was not confident with people and so hated presentations, training sessions, finance meetings etc. If I knew I was going to have to 'address' people, in whatever capacity, and felt scared about it then my strategy was to spend some time prior to the meeting imagining them 'in the bathroom' (I am sure you get the gist....this being a family forum!)

 

That really took the fear away and reminded me that we are all equal in the end. I can't recall who first said they used this strategy but it was someone quite well known and successful so clearly its very effective!!!!

 

D&R

[percy049]

I like the idea of the zombie apocalypse survival quiz idea!

After having cbt and tried many relaxation techniques following guidance from my psychologist, I've found the only thing that properly helps me are tablets

[patsylabrador]

Plum, OH thinks I'm not quite normal.

Percy049, my zombies are always there for me! They are versatile, in any situation where I am surrounded by people, which is something I don't enjoy I can distract myself with them. I'm sometimes surprised by my conclusions.

At dull gatherings like weddings and such they help the day pass.

If I'm in a slow moving crowd, a busy time on the Tube for example, I use them to find the quickest and best route through the milling crowd. Therefore it is fun and also useful.

I've done some of those quizzes on-line, in the last one I had a 62% chance of survival. This was based partly on the following:

Tinned and dried foods in the cupboard

Some knowledge/experience of survival skills

Some knowledge /experience of weapons handling

The will to abandon my mother should she be infected by a Zombie, which given her recent behaviour to me is a no brainer.

I lost a lot of points because I live in a highly populated area.

It does sound crazy, but it is a fun way of dealing with situations and as I hope you can see it's quite adaptable. Plus of course, when the Zombie Apocalypse happens, you will be prepared!!!!!!!!