Seagazer Posted March 24, 2010 Share Posted March 24, 2010 Goodness, has it really been 10 months? I really hope that you get some answers from this research. I'll keep everything crossed for you and am sending positive thoughts for you all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theherd123 Posted March 24, 2010 Share Posted March 24, 2010 That is good news Shirl, and I do hope the results are positive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Helly Welly Posted March 24, 2010 Share Posted March 24, 2010 It's great that there is some positive action regarding Tom. Whatever the outcome, you'll know one way or the other. It's hard to believe it's been 10 months, how are you all coping now? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patricia W Posted March 24, 2010 Share Posted March 24, 2010 That's really good news. I hope it all goes well, even if all it does is end the uncertainty. Tricia Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chook n Boo Mum Posted March 24, 2010 Share Posted March 24, 2010 Shirl, I've often wondered how Tom has been getting on, it's good to know that he's going to be part of this programme, hopefully giving you more of the much needed information that has not been accessible in the past 10 months......and I echo the "has it really been that long" sentiment {{{hugs}}} to you all Sha x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reikiranf Posted March 24, 2010 Share Posted March 24, 2010 That's good to hear and it will be good for you to have a conclusive answer, it gives you hope too that they haven't given up on Tom. Sending you and your family ((((HUGS)))) and positive thoughts. Amanda xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A chickychickychick-ENN!! Posted March 24, 2010 Share Posted March 24, 2010 That's excellent. Love and strength to you all. xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shirl Posted March 24, 2010 Author Share Posted March 24, 2010 It's great that there is some positive action regarding Tom. Whatever the outcome, you'll know one way or the other. It's hard to believe it's been 10 months, how are you all coping now? I don't think we are coping. I still cry about it almost every day, often at the most inappropriate times. Our mum cries at his bedside every visit. My brother won't discuss Tom and refuses to visit because he knows Tom would not want to be like he is. It's as if he blames us for keeping Tom alive. Short of depriving him of antibiotics there's nothing we could do anyway. My mum, sis and I make sure Tom has a visitor (one of us) everyday and will do as long as he is still with us. Knowing how aware Tom is will help us massively. At the moment I equate it to Tom being a missing person. We don't know if he's alive (in mind) or not . The not knowing is almost as bad as the situation itself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chook n Boo Mum Posted March 24, 2010 Share Posted March 24, 2010 You can only do what you feel is best in the circumstances...yes Tom wouldn't be like this if he had the choice, but also I'd have thought he wouldn't want to be on his own especially if he is aware of his surroundings. People deal with trauma & stress in different ways, your other brother's way is not right nor wrong, it's just his way It's been said before Shirl, we are always here to "listen" when you need us.... we have a broad collective shoulder and boxes & boxes of virtual choccies & tissues as needed More {{{hugs}}} Sha x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Valkyrie Posted March 24, 2010 Share Posted March 24, 2010 It doesn't seem that long. But it does sound like good news at long last. Still lots of hugs to everyone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lesley Posted March 24, 2010 Share Posted March 24, 2010 I do hope you get some positive news. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lewis Posted March 24, 2010 Share Posted March 24, 2010 Good news I was thinking about Tom the other day when you posted, I can't believe its been 10 months either. Hopefully some helpful news for you soon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chickencam Posted March 24, 2010 Share Posted March 24, 2010 I hope that the testing is done soon, and that it means that he gets the best possible treatment. Thinking of you all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Willow Posted March 25, 2010 Share Posted March 25, 2010 Shirl saidI don't think we are coping. I still cry about it almost every day, often at the most inappropriate times. Our mum cries at his bedside every visit. My brother won't discuss Tom and refuses to visit because he knows Tom would not want to be like he is. It's as if he blames us for keeping Tom alive. Short of depriving him of antibiotics there's nothing we could do anyway. My mum, sis and I make sure Tom has a visitor (one of us) everyday and will do as long as he is still with us. Knowing how aware Tom is will help us massively. At the moment I equate it to Tom being a missing person. We don't know if he's alive (in mind) or not . The not knowing is almost as bad as the situation itself. You are being a wonderful sister to Tom and your ability to continue to to organise visits so he has a visitor every day shows you are coping. It's not surprising you cry, it must be heart-breaking . I'm sure everyone you know understands how terribly difficult this is for all of you. I hope you get good news from the tests, although even if it is bad news it will help to at least have an idea what he can perceive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ain't Nobody Here Posted March 25, 2010 Share Posted March 25, 2010 I can't believe it's been 10 months either. Good news about the testing and it must be great to have something positive after all this time. I'm so sorry you're still finding it so difficult - totally understandably . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bluekarin Posted March 25, 2010 Share Posted March 25, 2010 It must be so frustrating for all of you and for Tom, and I hope the tests show something one way or another. Thinking of you (((hugs))) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shirl Posted March 25, 2010 Author Share Posted March 25, 2010 All these lovely posts are making me cry again. See told you it doesn't take much nowadays. I do appreciate your support but I begin to drive myself mad when I keep talking and thinking about it-I pitty my friends. Honestly my friends (virtual and real) have been fantastic so thank you to everyone. Don't forget to eat some of those chocolates yourselves. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lesley Posted March 25, 2010 Share Posted March 25, 2010 Sometimes talking over and over is the only way to make any sense out of things - you can always come on here to just talk. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chicktastic Posted March 29, 2010 Share Posted March 29, 2010 Thinking of you and your family Shirl!!! I have just read the entire thread as I have not seen it before! I think you are one fantastically strong woman Good luck!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shirl Posted September 14, 2010 Author Share Posted September 14, 2010 It has been nearly 6 months since I last updated and I have some tentatively good news. Tom went To Addenbrookes last week to the research centre where they did lots of MRI, EEG and other cognative and auditory testing. We don't have the full results yet but they have told us he has fluid surrounding the brain which causes pressure and inhibits recovery. It is early days so far but they are going to look at getting his previous MRI scans and then potentially putting a shunt in to drain the fluid away. We get the full results in about 3 weeks but until then we have hope. It's a shame it has taken 15 months to get this far but at least we're there now. On the downside I crashed my car last night. I don't know what happened. My car is not badly damaged, although undriveable, but the other car was damaged right across the side so as it is a 7 year old picasso I assume it will be a write off. I wasn't concentrating at all, I had other things on my mind and I asumme it was my fault although looking at the damage it looks more like he hit the front of my car as he drove past too close. It is guess work though as I don't have a clue. I have had so many near misses because I'm just not with it but I have no option to drive. Without a car I can't get the kids to school 10 miles away or see Tom. I've just picked up a hire car which isn't covered by insurance but I managed to get a good deal so for 28 days hire it is costing me £330 which includes insurance etc. I just have to try and keep me and the kids safe. I'm thinking I may go and see the Dr but I don't want him to take my licence away (well report me to Swansea as unsafe) or put me on some sort of anti d that means I'm not allowed to drive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lewis Posted September 14, 2010 Share Posted September 14, 2010 Hopefully some good news Shirl Shame about the car Make sure you look after yourself and take some time to relax - could have been worse, so maybe its a wake up call. Sending some hugs + positive thoughts down to you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Space Chick Posted September 14, 2010 Share Posted September 14, 2010 Sorry about the car accident, but pleased to hear some encouraging news about Tom Please continue to keep us posted Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chickencam Posted September 14, 2010 Share Posted September 14, 2010 This sounds like a positive step, thanks for the update. Take care of yourself, perhaps it would be better not to drive, your family need you to stay fit and well. Maybe you could alternate driving with taxi journeys to the hospital, so that you can avoid driving when you are feeling the most vunerable? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ain't Nobody Here Posted September 14, 2010 Share Posted September 14, 2010 Can't believe it's been 15 months . Very pleased to hear positive news for Tom but sorry to hear about your accident . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A chickychickychick-ENN!! Posted September 14, 2010 Share Posted September 14, 2010 That is good news. So sorry that this is such a devastating strain on you. I second chickencam on driving. I do not wish too sound harsh, but if you are really having that many near misses, it sounds like driving is too dangerous for you at this time. If you did have an accident, and god forbid someone got seriously hurt in either vehicle, it would be so much harder for you to keep going physically and mentally for yourself and your family. Are there any support services in the area which could help you with transport? The council, or red cross or charities possibly? Don't schools have to help with transport for certain distances? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
