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Birthdays - how do you celebrate (or just ignore...?)

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It's my birthday tomorrow and I am feeling less than excited...not a biggie (52!!) but in any case decidedly flat! The boy's still have to be got out of bed and to school, I still have to work in the morning and now the car needs an MOT in the afternoon ... deep joy! Maybe we will go out at the weekend somewhere for something but can't summon the enthusiasm :whistle:

 

This made me think...how do others on the forum feel about their own 'big days' and how do you celebrate or, indeed, otherwise?

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Good question :D It depends how I'm feeling for big birthdays. On my 21st my friend organised a huge surprise birthday meal in a restaurant which I loved. On my 30th I made the mistake of saying I didn't want a fuss so I didn't get one :( OH took me to Lisbon when I was 40 which was brilliant :D But my 50th was miserable :( Roll on 60!

 

This year I was with all my family, which is very unusual and the best bit was that my SIL had bought me a cake, with a horse on it, I felt like a child all over again :lol: Ideally we'd go somewhere nice for the day, or if at work, then have dinner out in the evening, or a special meal at home. OH's sister has decided she isn't celebrating her birthday anymore, or anybody elses, and I feel that's quite sad, I'm glad it doesn't apply to me!

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Celebrate it if you can you don't know how many more are left! That's my motto. I prefer all my close family for day and then different days for different friend sets. This year I was big 6 0 can hardly believe it. So I set a goal of visiting somewhere every month. I am currently in Canada to see my sister, Nov is Halloween break so going to Jersey and myself and two friends are going to Düsseldorf for Christmas markets in Dec. The only month I missed was Sept when plans didn't work out. Thankfully I have an excellent husband who seems to be doing ok without me. Though he was left extensive lists .

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I'm usually at Uni so spend the day with friends and have a class meat and then celebrate with family a week later when I'm home for Christmas.

For my 21st all of my uni friends came to Birmingham for the weekend, we went out and cleared the fridge when we got back at 4am :lol:

 

Visiting a new place every month sounds great! :D

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My birthday has never really been celebrated. As a child it always got lost in the chaos of going back to school after the summer hols, and now it gets lost in Little Miss Webmuppet going back to school after the summer hols. You can see a pattern :lol:

 

And to add to the chaos of back to school this year Mr W ended up in hospital so my birthday got completely forgotten.

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Wow, that's all a bit of a mix! It seems, in the main, people celebrate the biggies and ignore the inbetweeners! But I think AndyRoo has it about right.....must Google local restaurants :wink: !

 

OH has baked me a cake (you should SEE the state of the kitchen :roll: ) and I have some cards to open but I am miffed that, through my own stupidity (I took my eye off the ball and realised today that the MOT ran out.... on 9th :shock: ) I will spend half my birthday sitting in some grimy,oily garage whilst someone peers at my car then tells me it's going to cost a fortune :boohoo:

 

Heyho, there is fizz in the 'fridge!

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Happy Birthday!!!

 

Quite apt for me - was my birthday last Thursday. I actually find this a bit (probably childishly) upsetting. In my family we try to make a bit of a fuss over whoevers birthday it is....make sure they have a nice day, cards, presents, homemade birthday cake with candles and singing and (usually home cooked) birthday dinner with the family (until recently my mum, dad, sister and I).

 

However, OH and his family don't celebrate birthdays for adults at all, so he doesn't get it, isn't interested and thinks the way my family do things is weird and not necessary. Add to this he doesn't really like social occasions full stop.

 

So, he never makes any effort to organise anything for my birthday (he does get me a card and a present but I think he'd be quite happy not to) which to be honest makes me sad. Thus year I organised for he and I, my mum, and my dad and his girlfriend to go out to a local pub for dinner. It was lovely and my mum made me the traditional family birthday cake (chocolate sponge with Delia's chocolate fudge filling and topping) which we had back at our house (OH carried the cake with lit candles but didn't sing with everyone else), but I just would live it if I felt he wanted to do something special for me.

 

Sorry - just read that back - sound like a right whinger! I know he loves me - we just have different ideas about some things :roll:

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Happy Birthday for tomorrow x

 

If I'm in work I might go for lunch with colleagues. I'll make or buy cakes. Dress up and generally make a fuss, and make everyone join in! Then at the weekend go for a meal with my OH.

 

If my birthday is at the weekend we would try and go away for a night, evening meal and a night in a hotel, bit of sightseeing, nowhere too far away.

 

My last significant birthday was my 40th. I organised to go out for the day with my sisters, into town, all got our nails done then went for tapas and cocktails. In the evening my whole family went for a Chinese. I'd asked for a charm bracelet and charms. They all brought me one and I opened them in the restaurant. It was a really special day.

 

I like to make my own plans, I'm not big on surprises!

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My ED's boyfriend and his family don't really do birthdays or Christmas to any great extent. Whereas we go a bit overboard at Christmas and OH does the same with birthdays. I would rather have somewhere in between, I have no desire to add more stuff to my life at this stage, a few days away or nice meal and evening out is fine by me.

I feel that birthdays sort of set people up for disappointment, that sounds cynical and probably is, but so often they don't quite live up to expectations.

My next birthday is my 50th in six months time and my family are already asking me what I want and what I would like to do. ED wants to make a big thing of it which is very thoughtful but my ideal would be to sneak off somewhere and just be able to to do my own thing. She painted my OH a lovely picture for his 50th and feels that she needs to do something for mine. She has had to get used to her boyfriend not really knowing how to mark her birthday.

I sound ungrateful, I don't mean to be but it is just another number to me. Some people know how to do the right thing, buy the right present etc and some people don't. I struggle and feel bad when I don't make the right fuss :(

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I agree - when you're a child birthdays are exciting, when you're older they somehow never quite live up to expectations.

 

I'm single, my family don't live nearby, and waking up on your own on your birthday isn't fun, even if you've got presents and cards to open. I'd really rather ignore the whole thing but my friends (who are lovely) usually insist on a get-together. I organised a group trip away for my 50th and it was a nightmare as far as I was concerned - trying to make sure everyone was having a good time, checking all the bookings etc. It's meant to be my day but it always seems to end up being me doing what other people want! That sounds ungrateful, I am lucky to have a good group of friends but I could do without the fuss.

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Happy Birthday! Hope you have a lovely day :D

 

I've always made a fuss of other peoples birthdays because that's how things were when I was growing up. Special meal, cake, a few presents and maybe a day out.

My OH is useless at these things and is totally uninterested in birthdays or Christmas.

 

It's always wound me up. He'd be so much happier if I didn't have any expectations of him! He gets into a flap when it comes to buying me a present or taking me out and tends to find it all an unnecessary effort and pressure. I have to practically tell him what I would like, so no surprises here. I've given up dropping hints- they fall on deaf ears! I don't crave lots of gifts but a little thoughtfulness would be nice. We've been together for such a long time though, that I'm sort of used to it :roll::lol:

I made some 'birthday bunting' a few years ago and put it up every time someone has a birthday. I always have to put it up for myself which makes me feel ridiculously cross and self absorbed! I shouldn't bother really but if "Ooops, word censored!"ody else is going to make the effort, I'll darn well do it myself! :lol:

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I prefer them to be quiet, I would hate a party but we do try to mark birthdays and have fun according to the wishes of the person involved. They're usually just my close family, a board game, take away food and some laughter.

My last birthday was extraordinary and perfect. We were in Japan with ES and his girlfriend who is Japanese and completely delightful. ES is a canyoning guide, first we walked along a river where he is also a rafting guide and watched that for a bit and then he took us to his workplace which was a hidden series of waterfalls in a misty mountain woodland. Then for lunch we went to a very traditional Japanese restaurant somewhere in the mountains but I didn't really know where, it was idyllic, we had to remove our shoes before entering and we sat on tatami mats and there was this perfect Japanese garden outside the screens. It was everything you imagine about Japan. Then we went up a mountain, partly by funicular to visit a shrine. It was silent and misty. I think we all forgot it was my birthday but I think it was unbeatable for me.

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I love Birthdays oh and Christmas of course...

So we do celebrate. it was mine last Thursday I was 58.

Wednesday, out with OH and sister and brother in law ( his is the same day)

Birthday, out for dinner with Daughter and then boyfriend!! OH at golf do.

Friday, girlfriends to mine for fizz and natter... hope you are keeping up.

Saturday, Greenwich for lunch with sons, girlfriend and grandson, daughter and FIANCE ... yes they had just got engaged that morning, so big party as all family arrived.

Sunday down to Chistlehurst for lunch with close friends.

Phew, off to Scotland tomorrow for a rest. xx

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I hate my birthday.

 

I don't mind the getting older, I just find the actual day is (nearly) always a disappointment, despite the low expectations I have to start with.

 

The week before my 18th birthday, I went out to the pictures with my then boyfriends best friend (I know, it *was* a terrible thing to do.) My parents were really angry, and cancelled my birthday. No presents allowed. My dad had bought me a car.

 

Literally *every* day from then - until they moved house 250 miles away 6 months later - I woke up believeing that today would be the day they gave me my present. When my Dad drove off in the removal van, I realised that was it.

 

On my 19th birthday, my parents sent me an 18th Birthday card. I was living in a horrible room in a horrible part of town, and this really upset me. It took me all day before I could swallow my upset enough to phone them and thank them. I mentioned that it wasn't actually my 18th. My lovely mother said "Oh that's OK then, we didn't like to think of you being on your own on your 18th". (If they were that bothered, they would have come to see me, surely! )

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Oh goodness, what a mixed response...some positive and some less so but all interesting!

 

Thank you for all the good wishes; car failed the MOT so back tomorrow for a new tyre (which they didn't have in stock) and then a big bill and I am legal again!

 

OH made a lovely nutmeg cake ..... and we didn't have candles due to the fact that the resultant glow may have affected passing air traffic.

 

I have fizz and some wine..an early night with a good book!

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