alih Posted January 16, 2010 Share Posted January 16, 2010 Jue, i too think about you every single day and ache so much for you whenever you come to mind. I hope somehow you got through the holiday period and that the good memories are beginning to become more bearable and comforting, despite this being early days. Sending you lots of love, every day, ] Ali Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChrisP Posted January 17, 2010 Share Posted January 17, 2010 Still thinking of you and your family and hope that you are all ok. I still cannot imagine how you must be feeling, but do hope that by knowing there are so many people out there thinking of you and sending you wishes helps just that little bit. xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seagazer Posted January 17, 2010 Share Posted January 17, 2010 Thinking of you Joojoo. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ain't Nobody Here Posted January 17, 2010 Share Posted January 17, 2010 There's not a day goes by that I don't think of you, Jue. I truly hope it becomes easier to bear. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CluckyBucks Posted January 17, 2010 Share Posted January 17, 2010 How terrible, i hope you can stay strong Jue. Your in my thoughts. xx xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joojoo Posted January 17, 2010 Share Posted January 17, 2010 Hi everyone. I know I'm repeating myself but thank you again so very much for your lovely messages and unbelievably kind donations. I'm not very good at the moment. I seem to flit between completely numb or in floods of tears. I suppose it is to be expected, but I still can't believe or accept that it's happened, never mind that he's never coming back. Because his Dad and I were divorced and he used to spend a day each week with him, I keep imagining that's where he is now. Then it hits me all over again That feeling is the worst feeling in the world. It's like seeing a really awful accident happening right in front of you and you knowing that you are watching the most terrible terrible tragedy and there is nothing you can do about it. The doctor has given me some diazepam to try and stop the panics that I've been having (but they don't seem to be doing anything) and I'm seeing a dedicated Child Bereavement Counsellor in the morning as I've got so much stuff going round in my head at the mo. I keep seeing the accident and the few minutes after it, over and over again in slow motion, usually when I've eventually dragged myself to bed. How I will ever come back from this, I really don't know I know that only a couple of you on here have actually met Ashley and myself but PLEASE believe me when I say he WAS one in a lifetime, nevermind one in a million. He was absolutely my life. My best friend. My world. He was the most amazing, caring, intelligent, funny, wonderful young man I have ever met and now he's gone for ever. His and my life ended in a split second on that Sunday night. I'm sorry for everything above but I've got to get it out. I feel like I'm going completely round the bend. x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bluekarin Posted January 18, 2010 Share Posted January 18, 2010 Oh Jue I really wish I had some magic words that would help you. But there aren't any. I really hope the counsellor finds some way to help you tomorrow. But I think its one of those things that only time can help. And it will never go away. I try to imagine what you are going through but I just can't. I can only say we are all here for you. If you need to vent, then we will all listen. Lots of ((((hugs)))) Karin xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mostin Posted January 18, 2010 Share Posted January 18, 2010 I don't think you ever have to appologise for how you feel after loosing a child . I am up at silly o'clock because I feel pretty rough, but I bet you are up at this time every night thinking of him . I am still thinking of you and yours every day, and how horribly unfair this world is sometimes. I hope the councilling can stop your mind spinning long enough to give you a few moments peace xxxxxxxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egluntyne Posted January 18, 2010 Author Share Posted January 18, 2010 Thinking of you and sending love. xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seagazer Posted January 18, 2010 Share Posted January 18, 2010 Jue, its really hard to know what to say as anything I put down just feels so inadequate to what you are going through. I hope that you find the counselling some comfort and the thought that we are all thinking of you going through this terrible time. Take care Annx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chook n Boo Mum Posted January 18, 2010 Share Posted January 18, 2010 Jue, I can't put into words any kind of peace for you, just send more {{{hugs}}} and prayers. As has already been said, on here you can "vent" if you like and not be judged just supported, and as I know from personal experience now it really does help. Lots of love & more {{{hugs}} Sha x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ain't Nobody Here Posted January 18, 2010 Share Posted January 18, 2010 Jue, I'm so glad you feel able to post on here. Don't ever feel you can't let out how you feel. You know you have so many people feeling devastated for you and feeling so helpless. We would all take away your pain if we knew how. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Plum Posted January 18, 2010 Share Posted January 18, 2010 Hugs for you xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chickvic Posted January 18, 2010 Share Posted January 18, 2010 Sending hugs and love xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChrisP Posted January 18, 2010 Share Posted January 18, 2010 Jue, never apolagize for anything. Let out all your feelings here if you want, there are so many people constantly reading this who would offer friendly words to you. Take all the help on offer, and hope it goes ok today with the Child Bereavement Counsellor, or as well as can be expected. xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chickendoodle Posted January 18, 2010 Share Posted January 18, 2010 I don't know what to say other than I hope you find the strength somewhere to cope with this senseless tragedy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ClaireG Posted January 18, 2010 Share Posted January 18, 2010 Still thinking of you Jue and sending love and hugs. Like many of the others, i wish there was something i could do to take away some of the pain. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lesley Posted January 18, 2010 Share Posted January 18, 2010 I hope the counselling helps you to find some peace Jue. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goosey Lucy Posted January 18, 2010 Share Posted January 18, 2010 I hope you find the counsellor helpful today. Like many others I have no idea what to say that could help you at this time but wanted to let you know that I am thinking of you. I am just so sorry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chickencam Posted January 18, 2010 Share Posted January 18, 2010 I hope that the counselling helps in some way today. I do have some insight into how you feel, because my little brother died in a freak accident when he was only 5. I was only 8 at the time but it had a profound affect on my life. Only when I became a parent could I have any idea about how it affected my parents. The only thing that I can say, and this sounds so cliched, is that time will help. I won't claim that it will heal. We have just passed the aniversary of what would have been my brother's 40th birthday and tears were shed. We are also here for you day and night to vent your feelings to. Never feel that you have to apologise for the way you feel. Equally if you feel like a dose of normality we are always here for that too. Try writing your feelings down in the form of a diary or letters to you son. This was recommended to my parents and myself and we still do it from time to time, it has hepled us in small ways through some rocky times. My thoughts are with you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Helly Welly Posted January 18, 2010 Share Posted January 18, 2010 Oh Jue, i'm glad you fel able to vent on here, you know we'll always listen and provide any support we can. I really hope the bereavement counsellor helps. Maybe you could talk to Ashley. Either write it down or just chat to him during the day. It doesn't mean you are going mad but it might just get you through the day. See what the counsellor says. Never apologise for how you are feeling, there is no right and wrong way to deal with this. We are all here for you, whether we knew Ashley or not. I wish i had known him, he sounds like a wonderful young man xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
docsquid Posted January 18, 2010 Share Posted January 18, 2010 Jue, I am one who has met you both. I can't imagine what you are going through, but I hope the counselling helps you to make sense of how you are feeling right now. It won't be a miracle cure for you, but given a chance, I hope you can at least understand why you are feeling the way you are. We are thinking of you, and sending our love to you. Sarah and Steve Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chelsea Posted January 18, 2010 Share Posted January 18, 2010 Just to echo what everyone else has said really Jue. Don't ever feel like you have to post and there is no need to apologise. We all think of you and are sending you our love and thoughts. We are here to listen to you whenever you feel up to it. It was lovely to hear from you though, you take care of yourself.xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keyhole kate Posted January 18, 2010 Share Posted January 18, 2010 Jue, I have never met you or Ashley but my heart aches for you both. Nothing I can say will make life easier to bare. Ashley is and will be forever in your memories & heart. And you will both be forever be in my thoughts. From a mum to a mum xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sadietoo Posted January 19, 2010 Share Posted January 19, 2010 Hi Jue, I lost my first husband in a motorcycle accident, and so I do know enormous injustice of having your life turned upside down in an instant...however, he wasn't my child, and so it is still different and I just can't help feeling for you so much. I'm sure everyone has told you how in time the loss hurts less and that is true, but for now you have to get through each day the best way you can. Sending love and hugs and please feel free to pm me if you want xxxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
