Sil-El Posted November 1, 2017 Share Posted November 1, 2017 One of the things that really annoys me about Christmas is this whole idea that everyone has to have a wonderful, happy, joyous time, with a house full of friends and family and every one getting along and lots of gorgeous food and a tree stuffed with presents. The reality for an awful lot of people is something a lot different and there's never any acknowledgement that for many, Christmas can be an incredibly difficult time of year. After such a stressful few years I think it's time you looked after yourself and just do what you want to do, spend it where you want to, with whom you want and anyone else can either like it or lump it. I think if we all stopped expecting too much of the festive season and stepped back and chilled out a bit we'd all be a lot happier. Sorry to hear about your little cat, there's never a good time to lose a pet but this close to Christmas and on top of everything else, you could do without it couldn't you? All said, roll on 2018 and let's hope it's a vast improvement on 2017 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alis girls Posted November 1, 2017 Share Posted November 1, 2017 Thank you Sil-el you always talk a lot of sense. I am sure I am not alone in taking advice from other forum members. I agree Christmas is overrated. OH hates it. Hopefully spent with friends it will be fun and a laugh. Thank you for the good wishes on our lovely lad. I see you have kitties too. Anyway as I say have several outings to look forward to so onwards and upwards. Xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted November 1, 2017 Share Posted November 1, 2017 Hear hear! I love having everyone together at Christmas, but it's increasingly difficult as my mother is in the late stages of dementia/strokes. I also don't get the emphasis on consumerism and lots of massive gifts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sil-El Posted November 2, 2017 Share Posted November 2, 2017 This evening I have the place to myself for a few hours so I have treated myself to a couple of Christmas food and lifestyle magazines which I am going to enjoy reading with a healthy dose of cynicism. (And Pinot ) I love to look at all the ideas for recipes I'll never cook and decorations I'll never put up. Every year I think I must "Do Something Interesting With Sprouts" but every year all I do is steam them! While I like reading these mags at this time of year, I do think they help perpetuate the myth of the "perfect Christmas" where all the crockery, cutlery, glassware, table linen and curtains match and that your happiness at Christmas can only be judged on how much money you have spent buying tat for people you don't like and receiving an equal amount of tat you have no use for in return. Bah Humbug to it all Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted November 2, 2017 Share Posted November 2, 2017 We have a family policy to to buy 'tat'; useful, practical presents only. Got a massive axe one year - just the job Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cat tails Posted November 2, 2017 Share Posted November 2, 2017 I know the feeling! Although I have to say: I looooove Christmas! Can't help it... I was leafing through the Christmas cook book of Jamie Oliver. A gazillion page giant. All recipes look incredible and doable... but I know I can't be bothered... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geoid Posted November 2, 2017 Share Posted November 2, 2017 We have a family policy to to buy 'tat'; useful, practical presents only. Got a massive axe one year - just the job I bought my dad a double glazed window last year Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soapdragon Posted November 3, 2017 Share Posted November 3, 2017 I hate, hate, hate how commercialised Christmas is (like Halloween) and the fact that the media bombard us all with images of total perfection. This is just setting 99% of the population up for a fall; who pre cooks the sprouts before flambeing them in brandy and serving them with free range organic bacon lovingly hand salted by rosy cheeked farmer's wives in their rural kitchens complete with aga and Belfast sink? Who spends hours and hours wrapping presents so that every single fold is at a precise angle then decorates them with pom poms handcrafted by disadvantaged people from Indo China using eco yak hair leftover from producing something else very expensive, sold in Harrods? How many of us really float around in something floral from Boden at 10 to 1.00pm on Christmas Day cheerfully topping up the Champagne glasses of our totally delightful family having just taken the 34lb Norfolk bronze out of the oven and left it to rest (where the cat can't get it) for half an hour just prior to throwing together a floral table decoration worthy of Alan Titchmarsh? You get my drift; off for a lie down and its not even Bonfire Night yet - gah! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daphne Posted November 3, 2017 Share Posted November 3, 2017 to both of you Our 3 decorations produced by disadvantaged people in Vietnam read Peace, Joy, .......and Hove I have to say there are Xmas decs for sale here in Portugal, which i haven't seen before, including in the agricultural merchants Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cat tails Posted November 3, 2017 Share Posted November 3, 2017 Just had a fall with my motorcycle because a pizza delivery boy drove past me on his bicycle on the wrong side of the road. Wanted to turn into a parking spot when he just flew by on my right (which should have been my left ). So slammed on the breaks, but went too slow to find my balance again so toppled over. I'm not hurt, apart from a slightly sore shoulder, but my break handle is completely bend. Boy said he thought I was stopping for him to let him pass... whilst I was turning into the parking spot with my indicator out. He tried to make it my fault! Drove to the pizza place to talk to his manager. But the boss wasn't there so I have to call him tomorrow. But the guy in charge agreed with me that the kid was cycling on the wrong side of the road! I'll let the insurance companies sort it out, but I just hate the hassle! And having to get myself to the garage... AGAIN Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sil-El Posted November 3, 2017 Share Posted November 3, 2017 While I am very Bah Humbug about a lot of the festive season, I do love Christmas decorations, especially fairy lights I've got so many sets it's ridiculous and right now I'm having to be very strict with myself and avoiding The Range and John Lewis etc because I know if I venture in, I will come away with another set, or two. When I was little (a long time ago!), we only had one set of lights on the tree and that was it and I always wanted more. I was very envious of one of my aunties who had 2 sets on her tree and another one round the front window. My mother thought it was a ridiculous extravagance and wouldn't hear of such a thing. I used to love it that as we got closer to Christmas, more and more houses would have their decorations up and trees in the window and I could compare them all as I was walking past. I still like having a nose at what everyone else does although gawping at people's xmas decorations while driving is not to be recommended! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alis girls Posted November 3, 2017 Share Posted November 3, 2017 I love looking at the pictures of the Xmas table covered in flowers and candles that you see in magazines. Where do you put the food ? And all those candle burns got reaching over for the sprouts. Every season we have people at work coming in for suture removal sustained carving the turkey and burn dressings. Today had our cat PTS. RIP Sandy. Will miss him patrolling the back garden. The vet told us to let the other cats see his body for closure. His sister a pretty dippy tabby walked over his body. Basil the baby of 4 years looked at him and ran off..so much for closure. OH,YS and myself have cried buckets. The vet was lovely. So patient. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sjp Posted November 4, 2017 Share Posted November 4, 2017 I love looking at the pictures of the Xmas table covered in flowers and candles that you see in magazines. Where do you put the food ? And all those candle burns got reaching over for the sprouts. Every season we have people at work coming in for suture removal sustained carving the turkey and burn dressings.Today had our cat PTS. RIP Sandy. Will miss him patrolling the back garden. The vet told us to let the other cats see his body for closure. His sister a pretty dippy tabby walked over his body. Basil the baby of 4 years looked at him and ran off..so much for closure. OH,YS and myself have cried buckets. The vet was lovely. So patient. people that design these photo shoots don't put food out on the dinner table the get waited on plus all that foliage acts as a barrier so they can put guests that don't get on with one another on opposite sides of the table and not be able to see each other Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Olly Posted November 4, 2017 Share Posted November 4, 2017 Oh Ali, so sorry to hear it. I'm expecting to have this with Claudette at any point, she has got so many things wrong with her, but it never gets any easier, does it. And Cat Tails, sorry to hear about your accident - glad you're not hurt. I like spending Christmas with family, I like fairy lights, I like giving presents but I am soooo sick of the 'happy families' aspect of it and the consumerism. I am more and more conscious of not buying stuff that will go to landfill, and we always exchange 'wish lists' in my family so we're mostly getting stuff we actually want. This year I've struggled to come up with a list, I don't really need anything. I have such happy memories of childhood Christmases and they did not involve table centrepieces, fancy ways with sprouts (my dad would have had a fit!) or even lots of presents. A stocking, one main present, and playing board games and charades are the things I recall with pleasure. For my birthday I got a cinema trip, yet to be redeemed (I'm waiting for Paddington to open!), a ticket to a concert in a couple of weeks and an 'Escape Room' which I'm doing tomorrow. Perfect presents. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sil-El Posted November 4, 2017 Share Posted November 4, 2017 Ali, so sorry to hear about your little cat I do think the worst part of having pets is having to say goodbye to them. But it's the price we pay for having them in our lives and I wouldn't want to be without any of my animals, they bring such fun and joy into our lives don't they? I always think these gorgeous table decorations look amazing until everyone sits down to eat, and then within minutes the whole thing is ruined because things get moved, fiddled with, broken. And then someone knocks over a glass of red wine on the pristine white table cloth, and then someone else drips gravy, or cranberry sauce. And by the time you've done with the pudding, what was once a beautiful and festive scene looks more like a war zone and you wonder why you went to all that effort and spent all that money I do like the idea of sitting unpopular rellies behind huge flower arrangement and foliage though, I should have thought of that when the in-laws were still alive......................... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alis girls Posted November 4, 2017 Share Posted November 4, 2017 Thanks today we buried him in the garden he loved. Put some plants round him and found a lovely poem called Four paws in heaven. We all cried buckets. They are with us such a short time , please cherish your animal family. On a lighter note we were finishing off the burial and glanced up to see the three girls watching the performance like three nosey old ladies at a funeral. Made us laugh. RIP Sandy. X Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted November 5, 2017 Share Posted November 5, 2017 So sorry to hear that Ali Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chickencam Posted November 5, 2017 Share Posted November 5, 2017 Sorry to hear about Sandy, Ali, it’s so sad saying goodbye even when you know it’s for the best. I will never forget the confusion in Scamp’s eyes as the sedative took affect. We had to have her PTS 4 days before Christmas in 2015, it broke my heart. Our vet was lovely and really took his time with us too. Sadly Ziggy has been a much more relaxed cat without her sister. On the subject of Christmas, I love the festive feel but hate the consumerism side. I love lots of lights and pretty festive things and great food which is a big part for us. You can keep the presents and the grumpy shoppers though. We had very simple Christmas celebration when I was a child, one of my fondest memories is if the jigsaw that we would do. It was only my parents and I and we would always stay up to finish it on New Year’s Eve. I loved the food even then, we would have a big chicken with sausage meat stuffing then Christmas pud and I loved the tangerines nuts and Christmas cake but hated the dates! This year I’m particularly looking forward to Christmas, all three of our adult children still want to be with us and it will be lovely to have them all back together and be a nice break from my treatment. I postponed my chemo for a week, cycle 5 should have been on the day after Boxing Day. My oncologist agreed that it made sense from their point of view too, to delay it until the following week because of the pressure that they’d be under and it will give me an extended period of feeling better over Christmas so win win Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dogmother Posted November 5, 2017 Share Posted November 5, 2017 Glad to hear that you'll have break this Christmas Liz, and have your family around you. I remember family Christmases, when we were little and the Italian family came over too - one year my grandfolks had 20-something people on Christmas day and had trestle tables down the hall! What a jolly affair that was, we all had a brisk walk afterwards and played board games all afternoon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grandmashazzie Posted November 7, 2017 Share Posted November 7, 2017 I love Christmas, the food, the lights, the decorations. I try to do as much beforehand,already got most of the presents in, With our family of 7 and another 7 due for four days I get absolutely knackered. I would wish for an energy cocktail every morning and a Valium induced tranquility the rest of the day. Sorry to hear of Sandy. RIP and chickencam enjoy your family, I too am pleased my older ones come home too,even if it means bedlam. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alis girls Posted November 7, 2017 Share Posted November 7, 2017 Thanks everyone. Glad you are having a break from treatment Liz to have family time. It's turned chilly again. Everyone moaning at work either too hot or cold. Hopefully going to see my lovely cousins - 2 ladies like me in their 50's for Sunday lunch. This was the one positive side from dad's death we are back in touch. They was some upset years ago when my cousin got pregnant and wasn't married. Granny had meltdown which was bizarre she wasn't even religious. At this time granny had moved from South to East Midlands. They are lovely ladies and we always got on as kids. But hardly saw them as the distance was a problem. Also my mum and theirs weren't that pally. I sometimes wish instead of being born I could just beam myself down into a nice looking family. On the kitty front Basil is mourning Sandy's loss. He's sleeping a lot and is clingy poor baby. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soapdragon Posted November 18, 2017 Share Posted November 18, 2017 Not having been to the cinema for eons I have just investigated Paddington tomorrow in Oxford, Vue Cinema, and Henley on Thames Regal.......YS aged 9, ES aged 13 and 2 adults and 1st price £44.56 (they have child and teen rate ) and 2nd, inc booking fee ( ), £42.20. I am in shock/out of touch! When did it all get so expensive? We are, thankfully, not exactly poverty stricken but no way can we justify this for a couple of hours entertainment! Am I being mean or is this a bit over the top? We'll wait for the DVD! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sil-El Posted November 18, 2017 Share Posted November 18, 2017 It is pricey isn't it? And if you want popcorn or other sweeties or drinks as well, then it gets even more expensive. We have a Showcase near us and full price for adults is over £10 a head which is ridiculous. We either use "Insider" cards which is a sort of free membership thingy that gets you cheaper rates on Sunday evenings and all day Monday and Tuesday, or we do 2 for 1 on Meerkat movies on Wednesdays. Even so, we only go now for something we really want to see on the big screen, everything else we wait for the DVD. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soapdragon Posted November 19, 2017 Share Posted November 19, 2017 Why is it that, when you have just bought something from Amazon/E Bay etc, they then bombard you with ads for almost identical items to the one that you have just bought If I have just bought a radio controlled clock then I am unlikely to need another one two days later Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cat tails Posted November 19, 2017 Share Posted November 19, 2017 I think you definitely should buy another one! A person cannot have too many radio controlled clocks! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
